Green Eyes
by SevReed
Summary: Tori has a dilemma, and she turns to Jade. How long before Jade has a dilemma of her own?
1. Chapter 1 - Let's Talk About Sex, Baby

**Hi. I'm a little stalled on A Winter's Tale, so here something else. I have this one pretty much planned out, so hopefully we'll get through it fairly quickly.**

 **If you don't know 'Yakkity Sax', it's also the Benny Hill music. If that helps.**

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Jade was sitting alone at a table in the Asphalt Cafe, engrossed in her phone, when she heard a familiar sigh, and Tori dropped down into the seat opposite. "Hey."

"Hey," Jade said without looking up.

"What are you watching?"

"I posted the video of Robbie getting attacked by that dog. It's getting a lot of hits."

"Jade!"

"What?"

"That wasn't funny! It was awful. He had to go to the hospital and everything. "

"Yeah, you're right. It was awful."

"So why post it?"

"Because then I set it to 'Yakkity Sax', and now it's hilarious."

"Good grief." Tori shook her head. There was a long pause, broken only by the faint sound of a saxophone and Jade's sniggering, before she spoke.

"Can I ask you something?"

"Mmmm?"

"Are we friends?"

The question was so unexpected that Jade looked up. "What?"

"Are we friends?"

"In what way?"

"In the way," Tori said, patiently, "that two people sometimes are, when one of them isn't being a total gank."

"Oh, come on, Vega," Jade said. "You're not that big a gank."

"I'm not talking about me."

"Oh."

"So?"

"So what?"

"So, are we friends?"

Jade considered this. She looked back at the phone. "I guess so."

"Really?"

"You want it in writing?"

"No, but…"

"Wait," Jade said, suspiciously. "Are you expecting me to hang out with you? I think you should know that this doesn't oblige me to hang out with you."

"You already hang out with me."

"I know. But I don't have to."

"No, I'm not expecting you to hang out with me."

"Good."

Tori fell silent. There was a long period broken only by the sound of her fidgeting with her bag, until Jade couldn't stand the suspense. "So, are you asking for a reason?" she said. "Or did you just drop by for validation because no one's told you you're pretty for a couple of hours?"

"You think I'm pretty?"

"Don't push your luck, Vega. So?"

"Well," Tori said. "It's just…" She hesitated. "I need some advice."

"Advice?" Jade said, surprised. "From me?"

"Yes."

"Why can't you ask someone else?"

"Because you just said we were friends."

"Yeah, but I didn't know it was going to involve me having to _do_ stuff. And why would you trust me to give you advice, anyway?"

"Again, friends."

"Yeah," Jade said. "But you've got to balance being friends against the opportunity for me to watch you fail spectacularly. I'm not sure I can pass that up."

Tori sighed. "You know what?" she said. "Forget it." She started to get up. "I thought we might be able to have an adult conversation for once."

Jade relented. "Okay, fine," she said. "I'll help. But seriously, though, why me? Don't you usually go to Andre for this kind of thing?"

Tori sat back down and pulled a face. "I can't."

"Why?"

"It's not really something I can ask a guy."

"Trina, then. She's got to be good for something. Or Cat."

I can't ask Trina because she's a blabbermouth, and I can't ask Cat because it would make her brain explode."

"If Cat's brain was made of dynamite she wouldn't have enough to blow her hat off."

"The point is," Tori went on, ignoring her, "that I don't really know anyone else that has any…" She squirmed, uncomfortably. "Experience."

"Experience?" Jade echoed. "Experience of what?" She noticed that Tori was blushing furiously, and her eyes widened. "Ohhhhhh," she said. "Oh. My. God."

"What?"

"Please don't tell me this is about sex."

"Shhh!"

"Jeez, Tori, how old are you? Do you really need me to give you the whole 'birds and the bees' talk?"

"No!"

"You know, you can get books out of the library on this stuff, or just google it. I might be going out on a limb here, but I'm pretty sure there's something about sex on the internet."

"I know how to do it!" Tori hissed, glancing around furtively to see if anyone was listening. "At least, I know how to do it in _theory_ ," she conceded. "What I want to know is… when."

"When?" Jade said. She thought for a moment. "When your parents are out, I guess. Or there's always the back seat of the car on the way home from the movies if you're desperate."

"Not _that_ sort of 'when'," Tori said. "I mean… well, the thing is, I've been seeing this guy-"

"Ted."

"-Ted, and… Wait, you know about that?"

"Of course I know," Jade said. "Everybody knows."

"How?"

"Cat told us."

"What?" Tori said, horrified. "But I told her not to say anything!"

"Yeah, good luck with that. So go on. You're dating this boring guy, Ted…"

"He's not boring."

"He sounds boring."

"You've never even met him!"

"He's dating _you_ , Tori, how exciting can he be?"

"You do know how this friendship thing's supposed to work, right?"

"Not really, no."

"Well, anyway," Tori said, glaring at her, "we've been seeing each other for a little while now, and he's getting kind of keen to… move things along, if you know what I mean."

"Unfortunately, yes."

"And I was just wondering when it's the right time to… when it's appropriate for me to…" Tori was practically smoldering with embarrassment.

"To let him get past third base and score a home run," Jade supplied.

"Yes," Tori said, relieved.

"I see. And you're asking me why, exactly?"

"Because you've had a long-term boyfriend."

"Have I?"

"Beck," Tori said. "Remember? Tall guy, dark hair, Canadian. You're dating him."

"Oh." Jade pulled a face. "Yeah."

"I mean, how did you guys know when you were ready?"

"What makes you think we've done it?"

"Haven't you?"

"Well, yeah. But I don't like people making assumptions about me."

"So, how did you know?"

Jade shrugged. "We never really thought about it, we just got drunk one night and did it."

"That's not much help."

"Well, what do you want me to say?"

"I don't know," Tori said, in frustration. "It's just, I don't want people to think I'm… you know, _easy_ ," she said, "but on the other hand I don't want him to lose patience and dump me."

"Well if he does that, he wasn't worth dating in the first place."

"But what if he goes around telling everyone there's something wrong with me?"

"I've got to say, Vega, you don't sound like you have a very high opinion of Teddy-boy, considering you're thinking about losing it to him."

"I do," Tori said, wretchedly. "He's really sweet, and I like him. But you know what guys are like. They talk. I don't want people to think I'm weird."

"That ship sailed loooong ago."

"Very funny. Look, are you going to help me, or are you just going to sit there making smart remarks?"

"I don't know, yet. Do you actually _want_ to do this?"

There was a fraction of a second's hesitation. "Yes."

"I mean, with Ted, specifically. Because if this is just about popping your cherry without getting a bad reputation, I'm pretty sure you could find someone else. Hey, what about Andre? Give it up to him, he'd be pretty cool about it."

"Jade," Tori scolded. "Don't be gross. He's a friend. Anyway, he's seeing that weird girl from ballet class."

"Okay, what about Robbie? There's a kid who could use some action," Jade suggested with a straight face. "Plus it'd all be over in a couple of seconds, you wouldn't even have to break a sweat."

"I'm not looking for potential _candidates_ ," Tori said, exasperated. "I'm happy with Ted. I just need to know _when_."

"Okay, okay." Jade held up her hands. "Sorry. This is difficult for me. I'm not used to people wanting my opinion."

"You're always giving them your opinion."

"I know. I'm just not used to them wanting it."

Tori slumped dejectedly over the table, head on her hands, and Jade felt a pang of pity. She'd never thought about this kind of thing, because until Tori had started at school, her world had consisted of her and Beck, everything else was just background noise. The idea of other people's approval or disapproval had never crossed her mind. But Tori was different. Tori cared very much what other people thought. She reached out a hand and awkwardly patted her on the head.

"Tori, look, just… Just don't do anything you're not ready for, okay?" she said. "Don't worry about what it looks like, don't worry about what people think about you. Just go with what feels right, because that's what's going to count at the end of the day – whether you feel good about yourself or bad about yourself afterwards. And a lot of that's going to come down to whether you feel like he respects you or not. Whether you trust him. I trusted Beck, which is why it wasn't a big deal for us. If you don't trust Ted, then maybe you should wait until you do, or find someone else."

Tori looked up and blinked. "You think?"

"Yeah," Jade said. "But don't beat yourself up over it. Let's face it, in ten years' time it's not going to matter a damn who you lost it to, it'll just be something to laugh about at the class reunion. Unless you get yourself knocked up."

"You make it sound so romantic."

"There's nothing romantic about teenage sex, Tori. Trust me," Jade said. "Especially not the first time. It's all _wham, bam, thank you ma'am_ then he's wiping his dick on the curtains while you lie there wondering what all the fuss was about and whether you can risk putting your grandmother's heirloom quilt through a hot wash to get rid of the stains."

Tori shuddered. "Thanks. You know I'm never going to be able to look Beck in the eye again, don't you?"

"Just telling it like it is. And it serves you right for making _me_ think about _you_ having sex. Look, I'm not trying to put you off, okay?" Jade said. "I'm only trying to make sure you go into it with realistic expectations. I can't tell you when it's right because that's up to you guys." She looked down at the table and picked at a splinter. "I just don't want you to get hurt, that's all."

There was no reply, and she looked up to find that Tori was gazing at her with an odd expression. "What?" she said defensively. "I can care if I want to." She felt her face burning. "Anyway," she said quickly, looking away, "that's all I've got. Take it or leave it." The bell rang. "Right, gotta go."

She turned to leave, but found Tori's hand on her arm. "Jade?"

"What?"

Tori smiled genuinely, for the first time. "Thank you."

"Yeah, well." Jade shifted, uncomfortably. "Don't make a big deal out of it." She shouldered her bag, and made her way into school.

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 **So, Tori and Ted, don't they sound like a lovely couple? I'm sure we're all rooting for them to live happily ever after.**


	2. Chapter 2 - Toys In The Attic

**Hi, we're back. Not sure how people feel about this one, but we'll carry on anyway. Thanks to those of you who reviewed.**

 **And don't worry, this isn't the Tori and Ted story. Although I feel a little sorry for him. Maybe I should pair him up with Carla in something.**

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Jade spent a restless night. Tori's virginity had always been a source of comfort to her, not least because it was a clear line in the sand, a demarcation between her maturity and Tori's inexperience, a reminder that no matter how many times she was passed over for the lead role, no matter how many times Tori's rising star seemed to eclipse her own, there was still this - she'd done it, and Tori hadn't. But also because it stood for something, a little glimmer of innocence in an increasingly adult world, an untarnished spot on the mirror. Tori was hot - Jade was secure enough to admit that - and the fact that she never seemed to realize it, that she hadn't stepped into it, embraced it, used it to her own advantage, was oddly reassuring in an age when everyone else was racing to grow up.

And now all that was going to change. Tori was going to pack away her toys into the attic, and make her first foray into the world of sex and disappointment by getting laid. And for reasons Jade couldn't quite fathom, that thought twisted in her gut. Listening to Tori talk about sex was like hearing your grandmother using the 'c' word, it was all kinds of wrong. Tori still slept with her Cuddle-Me-Cathy doll, for Christ's sake. Although that wasn't necessarily a deal-breaker - Jade had felt like an adult for as long as she could remember, but still Sergeant Stuffly kept his secret, silent vigil in the bottom drawer of her closet, waiting for the call to arms, the moment when his thread-bare comfort might be needed once again.

And Tori wasn't even doing it for love, that was the worst thing - she didn't love Ted, that much was obvious, she was just going to go through the motions because that was what was expected of her, that was just the next thing, and her hesitation when Jade had asked whether she really wanted to had been noticeable. The thought of Tori undressing, reluctantly, hands trembling with nerves, waiting for a mauling at the hands of some teenage asshole made Jade's stomach churn. Added to that was a sense of guilt that she might have encouraged her to do it. She tried to replay the conversation in her head. She'd intended it to be a brush-off - _do what you want to do, play it by ear_. But maybe she'd blown it by telling her it was no big deal. Fuck, that wouldn't be good - to have Tori standing there in tears the morning after the big night, blaming her.

Maybe she'd got it all wrong. Maybe Tori really wanted this, maybe she was so overcome with lust at the very thought of Ted that she couldn't wait to throw caution to the wind, toss her underwear over the lampshade, and get on with the job. But somehow, that didn't make it seem any better - mentally, the thought that Tori wasn't an unwilling participant made her feel less guilty, but the idea of Tori romping around the bedroom with Ted, shrieking in delight, made the gnawing pain in her belly worse.

She groaned and rolled over. Tori was nothing to do with her, and what she got up to was her own business. She'd asked for Jade's advice and Jade had given it to her, to the best of her ability. If Tori chose to get jiggy with Ted that was her own decision, and it wasn't up to Jade. She'd already spend two hours more of her life thinking about Tori having sex than she'd ever budgeted for, and the cramps in her stomach were probably just the fact she was due on. At least she hoped she was. That niggling worry every month was a reminder that she was the last person to lecture anyone else about innocence.

Speaking of which...

She crawled out of bed towards the closet, opened the drawer and pulled out its scruffy inhabitant. "Just for tonight," she warned, waving a cautionary finger in its face, "and if you breathe a word of this to anyone, I'll rip your ears off and have you busted down to Private."

Satisfied that the stuffed bear understood the terms of his parole, she laid it on the pillow and curled up next to him, lost in the familiar smell of childhood.

It really was none of her business. Tori was a big girl, she could make her own decisions.

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"I don't think you should do it."

Tori had opened her locker door in an empty hallway, and closed it a second later to reveal a stern-faced Jade, stood stiffly upright, as though she'd been waiting there for days.

She blinked. "Er... what?"

"I don't think you should do it," Jade repeated. "You and Ted. I don't think you're ready."

Tori was lost for words for a moment, because unlike Jade she hadn't spent all night thinking about this, and most of her morning had been taken up by yelling at Trina. "Do what?"

"Have sex."

Realization dawned. "Jade!" she hissed. "Not here."

Jade was confused. "You were gonna do it here?"

"No! Just..." she grabbed Jade and hustled her into the janitor's closet, kicking it closed behind her. "I don't really want to talk about my love life in the hallway," she said, crossly.

"Oh. Sorry."

"Anyway, what do you mean I'm not ready?"

"You're not ready. I can tell."

"How? Yesterday you said it was all up to me, and how I felt."

"Yeah, but then I was thinking about it last night, and I changed my mind."

"But... wait, you were thinking about it last _night_?"

"What? No, of course not."

"You just said-"

"I mean, I gave it a moment's consideration, while I was doing something more interesting. Honestly, Vega, if you think I spend my nights thinking about your sex life then you are seriously deluded. I mean, seriously."

Tori gave up. "So, why?"

"Why what?"

"Why don't you think I'm ready?"

"You're just not."

"That's not an answer."

"Yes, it is. I know you, and this is too soon. You've barely even got out of dating kindergarten, and now you're pushing to graduate. You're not ready."

"But-"

"Sorry, Tori, but that's the way it is. I'm putting my foot down." Tori raised an eyebrow. "What?" Jade said. "You wanted my advice, I'm giving it to you."

"Advice, Jade. Not permission."

The look of defiance on Tori's face told Jade she'd better change tack, otherwise she risked pushing Tori into it just to spite her. "Come on," she said. "I'm just looking out for you." She decided to deploy her secret weapon. "That's what friends do."

It worked. After a moment Tori's shoulders sagged, and she sighed. "I guess."

"I'm not saying never, okay? But you've nothing to lose by waiting a while."

"And what if he doesn't want to wait?"

"Then he's an asshole, and you deserve better."

"Jade!"

"What?"

"Don't call him an asshole. That's not nice."

"Asshole is as asshole does, Vega. If he won't wait till your ready then he's an asshole." Tori still looked doubtful. "Come on, Tori," Jade said. "You're worth waiting for, aren't you?"

She hadn't meant it to come out so suggestively, and she felt her face reddening. "I mean…"

But Tori just grinned. "I know what you mean." The bell rang for class, and she picked up her bag. "I guess you're right, it wouldn't hurt to wait a while. We'd better go." She paused with her hand on the handle of the door. "Talk later?"

"Sure."

They wandered out of the closet, and Tori prepared to head off to her lesson. But just before she did, she bumped her hip playfully against Jade's. "And just for the record," she murmured, "yes I am."

"What?"

"Worth waiting for."

She winked and walked away down the hall wiggling her fingers in farewell, leaving Jade with a profound sense of relief and a strange weakness in her legs. A crisis had been averted, and yet somewhere, although she couldn't quite put her finger on it, a new crisis was forming.

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And so it went on for a week or two. On the surface, nothing had changed, they were still arguing, the snarky comments still flew across the table in the Asphalt Café. But an astute observer might have noticed that the snarky comments were less barbed, the arguments less intense, and the two of them could occasionally be found huddled together, or whispering in a corner.

 _"He bought me flowers yesterday."_

 _"Means nothing."_

 _"Jade!"_

 _"What? Flowers are just plants. They grow straight out of the ground."_

 _"He didn't pick them. They had a ribbon on."_

 _"Cemetery."_

 _"And a card."_

 _"So he got them at the store. Get back to me when he puts in more effort than it takes to buy a box of donuts."_

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 _"He wrote me a poem."_

 _"Let me see it."_

 _"No."_

 _"Why not?"_

 _"It's private."_

 _"You mean it's awful."_

 _"It's not awful."_

 _"So let me see it."_

 _"Okay, it's awful. But he really tried."_

 _._

 _._

 _._

 _"He got me a bracelet."_

 _"That's nice."_

 _"What, really?"_

 _"Yeah, really. Not 'come and get it, big boy' nice, but it's pretty. Maybe he's not so bad after all."_

 _._

 _._

 _._

 _"He wants to get me a puppy."_

 _"He's an idiot."_

 _._

 _._

 _._

"You want to go to Nozu's?"

"No."

"Oh."

"You ready to go?"

"What? Where are we going?"

"Nozu's. You're buying."

"I thought you said you didn't want to go?"

"You know me, Vega, I'm all about self-sacrifice."

"Yeah, right. So why am _I_ buying?"

"Because you're going to give me the rundown on your boyfriend's latest tedious attempt to get into your pants, and I'm going to tell you whether it's worth it or not."

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They sat in silence, Tori picking at her food, Jade resting her head on her hand, watching her. Despite the Damoclean sword hanging over her in the shape of Tori's _will-she-won't-she_ status, she was actually enjoying herself. Tori was surprisingly good company once they had something to talk about, and the fact that it was Tori's problem and not hers meant she didn't have to give anything up.

There was a strange intimacy to it, a bond she hadn't expected - Tori had presumed on a friendship that Jade hadn't really known existed, and now she felt compelled to keep up her end of the bargain. Tori had opened up and confided in her, and _only_ her - and even though it had been more by necessity than choice, and she wished to God that it had been about anything other than this, it still made her feel a little bit special. Trusted. She noticed that Tori's mouth had started moving again, and tuned back in.

"His parents are away this weekend," she sighed. "And he wants me to go over."

"Uh huh," Jade said, through a mouthful of food, "which you can't do, because you have that thing."

"And he hasn't said anything, and I'm not planning on... you know, but it's going to feel like... Wait, what thing?"

"That thing," Jade said. "The thing that you and I are doing this weekend."

"We have a thing?"

"Yes."

"This weekend?"

"Yeah. And it's very important," Jade added. "So you tell Ted you can't go because if you miss it, I'm going to rip your arms off."

"But..."

"Sorry. I'd love to let you go, but the thing comes first."

Tori stared at her pasta, brow knotted. "What kind of thing?"

"Big thing," Jade mumbled, spitting crumbs. "Very big thing."

The penny finally dropped, and Tori's face lit up in realization. "Of course! We have a thing!" she said, happily. "I can't go because we have a thing!" She paused. "Wait, do we actually..?"

Jade rolled her eyes. "No of course we don't, Tori."

"Right."

They ate for a moment, until Jade noticed the return of Tori's dejected look. "What is it now?"

"It's just…"

"What?"

"I'm going to have to lie to him," Tori said, glumly. "And it feels wrong."

"You'll soon get used to it. Lying is what makes a relationship work."

"No it isn't."

"Yes it is," Jade said. "Be honest, how many times have you said 'I love you' when you didn't really mean it?"

"Never."

"You've always meant it?"

"I've never said it."

"Oh."

"I don't want to start lying to him. I'm no good at it, for one thing."

"Well you're going to have to get good pretty quick, baby girl, otherwise you'll end up doing _your_ thing, if you catch my drift."

"Ugh." Tori stared at her plate for a moment, deep in thought. "Unless…"

"Unless what?" Jade said.

Tori looked up and bit her lip, and Jade saw the gleam in her eye. "Oh, no. No. no. no," she said, firmly. "No way."

"Oh, come on, Jade," Tori pleaded. "It'll be perfect. That way, if he calls I don't have to lie, because I really _will_ be doing something."

"I am not spending my weekend with you."

"It doesn't have to be the whole weekend, just Saturday night."

"No. I've got plans."

"Really?"

"Well, no, but I might make some."

"Who with? Beck's away."

"I didn't say it had to be with Beck."

"Who then?"

"Um..."

"Me, that's who."

"Look, just because we're friends – kind of – it doesn't mean I want to hang out with you."

"You're hanging out with me now."

"I know, but that's only because you offered to buy me food."

"I didn't offer, you made me."

"Yes, but-"

"Please?"

Jade hesitated. For all her protesting, she couldn't really think of a reason why not, and the look on Tori's face was irresistible. "Okay, fine," she said with a resigned huff. "We can do something."

"Yay! We could go out, maybe get something to eat, catch a band…"

"Okay. But you're paying."

"… or we could just stay home and watch a movie."

"Cheapskate."

"You're already eating what's left of my allowance."

"So are you going to call him?"

"Who?"

"Ted. Tell him the good news."

"Um…" Tori looked shifty. "Maybe later."

"No, now."

"Why?"

"Because I'm giving up my entire weekend to help you, and I want to make sure you're not going to bail on me for lover-boy."

"I wouldn't-"

"Plus, I want to hear you squirm."

Tori glared at her and reluctantly pulled out her phone. She dialed the number and then rearranged her face into an expression of breezy cheerfulness.

"Hey!" she cooed, when it picked up. "Hi. It's me. How are you? Yeah, I I'm okay. Yeah, I missed you, too." She looked up to see Jade sticking her fingers down her throat and flapped at her with her free hand. "Anyway," she said, "the thing is, I mean the reason I'm calling… apart from to say _I miss you_ , obviously, is that I know you said we might hang out this Saturday over at your place, but I just remembered that I already arranged to do something with a friend, and I really can't get out of it. Yeah, I know, what a drag." Jade raised her eyebrows as Tori mouthed an apology. The voice on the other end wasn't quite audible, but there was a tone of disappointment. "Who is it?" Tori glanced at Jade. "It's Jade, from school." The voice on the other suddenly because a lot more audible, and Tori clamped the phone to her chest guiltily. "No, not that Jade," she hissed into it, trying to avoid Jade's eye. "The… _other_ Jade. The much nicer one. The one that I'm sat next to _right now_."

The laughter on the other end of the line dies down, and Tori finished the call with a flurry of platitudes and promised to talk later. She put the phone down and looked up, blushing furiously.

"So," Jade said, sweetly. "There's another Jade?"

"Er…. Yes?"

"It's funny, I never heard of her."

"Um…"

"She sound pretty bad," Jade went on, smiling as she picked up a chopstick. "Is she mean to you? Is she a horrible person?"

"Well…"

"Is she the kind of girl that would stab you in the eye with a plastic eating implement just for badmouthing her to your boyfriend? Come on, Tori, you can tell me." She leaned dangerously close and wiggled the chopstick under Tori's nose. "I'm the _nice_ one."

"All right!" Tori said. "Okay. I may have told him a few things about you that might, _might_ , have made it sound like we were… not friends."

Jade leaned back and folded her arms. "For shame, Tori," she pouted. "I'm deeply hurt. "

"Really?"

"I dunno. It depends. Did you make me sound ganky, or terrifying?"

Tori licked her lips in indecision. "Is there a right answer to that?"

Jade sighed. "You know, sometimes I think you don't know me at all. Okay, I'll be over at your place at six."

"In the evening?"

"There's another six?"

"Great," Tori said, relieved. "You want pizza?"

"Fine."

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"As long as you're not making it. Your pizza sucks."

"That was your fault!"

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 **So, next up, sleepover at Tori's. Is anyone enjoying this? Or would you rather we went with 'A Winter's Tale' instead?**

 **Note - the 'thing' they're talking about here is in absolutely no way related to the 'Thing' from 'Power Play'. I'm pretty sure neither of them are ready for that ;)**


	3. Chapter 3 - Hey, Buddy

**Hi there. It's my birthday today. Where does the time go? Anyway, I'm sorry this is taking so long, I've been pretty busy, and this chapter seemed to take forever. I'm not entirely sure it's any good, I wasn't really expecting them to be having a sleepover at this point in the story but Tori insisted.**

 **Don't get excited, it won't be _that_ kind of sleepover, we've got a way to go yet. Many thanks for your comments, I really appreciate them.**

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Jade walked into the room. She'd been in Tori's room before, of course, usually without her permission, often without her knowledge. But this was the first time she'd even been invited. She hugged her bag to her, cautiously, in case it touched anything cute and was tarnished forever. In fairness, Tori's room was quite tasteful, a mile away from the explosion of frilly nonsense that constituted Cat's bedroom, but you couldn't be too careful. Tori spread her hands, awkwardly. "Hey," she said, brightly. "Welcome to..."

Jade tensed in anticipation of whatever terrible introduction Tori was going to make. _'...Vegaville, population us!'_ was tolerable, _'My Favorite Nightmare'_ would have been refreshing. If she said _'The Pleasuredome'_ it was all over.

The same thought obviously occurred to Tori. "… my room," she finished lamely.

"Yeah. Thanks." Jade looked around, still clutching her bag, while Tori hovered nervously. "Is Cat coming?"

"Um, no," Tori said. "I didn't think…." She hesitated. "Do you want me to call her?"

Jade considered this. On the one hand, there were no awkward silences when Cat was around, because she filled any available lull in the conversation with gibberish, but on the other hand…

"No," she said. "It's fine."

"Well, okay," Tori said, regaining her cheerfulness. "So I guess it's just the two of us.""

"Yes."

She poked Jade playfully on the shoulder. "Just you and me."

"Yes."

"Vega and West."

"Tori…"

"The Jadester and the Torimeister."

"I have a pair of very sharp scissors in my bag, Tori."

"Sorry."

"What are you so enthusiastic about, anyway?"

"I don't know it's just… I know we're kind of friends but I never thought we'd be… bed-buddies."

"First of all, Tori, never, ever refer to us as 'bed-buddies' again, and secondly, we're only doing because you're too much of a drip to tell your other potential 'bed-buddy' that you don't want to sleep with him."

"I am not," Tori protested. "I just don't want to feel like a liar."

"So I'm making this epic sacrifice just so that you feel better?"

"Well, that, and I thought it might be fun."

"Right."

Tori sighed. "You don't have to be here, Jade," she said. "If you really don't want to. You can always go home."

Jade looked at her for a moment. "Nah," she said. "I'm here, now." She pushed past Tori and flung herself on the bed, landing horizontally, legs already crossed, hands behind her head. "So entertain me, Vega. I want to be entertained."

.

.

.

"So what do you want to do?" Tori said. They were sat side-by-side on the bed, Jade having kicked off her shoes, Tori cross-legged in her pajamas.

"I dunno. What do you usually do at sleepovers?"

"Depends who I'm with."

"So I'm not the first?" Jade pouted. "I'm wounded, Tori. Deeply wounded."

"No you're not. Anyway, I know you have Cat over sometimes."

"Don't remind me."

"So?"

"So what?"

"So, what do you do when Cat stays over?"

"I close my eyes and count the precious seconds of my life slipping away until she shuts up and goes to sleep."

"That sounds like fun."

"I'm bigging it up. It's less exciting than that."

"Right. Well, at least I don't have much to compete with."

"One... two... three... four..."

"All right, all right. We could paint our nails?"

"Do girls really do that?"

Tori looked at Jade's nails, black and shiny. "Well I'm guessing you do," she said, doubtfully. "Otherwise you really need to start taking a bath more often."

"I mean, do they really do it for fun?"

"Well, not fun, exactly..."

"What else do you do? Brush your teeth together? Clean each other's ear wax?"

"Okay, how about... Truth or Dare?"

"No."

"Why not?"

"Because people always play Truth or Dare at sleepovers, and it never ends well. I don't want to end up running round the block in my underwear just because I don't want to tell you my favorite color."

"It's black."

"That was just an example."

"It was a terrible example."

"Okay, then, I don't want to end up running round the block in my underwear just because I don't want to tell you I cried when my goldfish died."

Tori's face crumpled in sympathy, and Jade rolled her eyes. "You see?" she said. "This is exactly what happens when we get into it. I'll end up telling you embarrassing stuff."

"It's not embarrassing to cry when your pet dies."

"It was a goldfish, Tori, not 'Old Shep'."

"I know, but when you're a kid these things are… wait," Tori frowned. "You _were_ a kid, right? This isn't, like, last week or something?"

"I was five."

"You see? It's only natural."

"Yeah," Jade conceded. "Although it wasn't so much the fact that he died, it was the _way_ he died."

"What happened?"

"My uncle choked to death on him at my birthday party."

"What?"

"He was pretty drunk. Said he'd seen it on 'Candid Camera'."

"Oh, God. That's awful."

"Tell me about it. " Jade sniffed. "I loved that fish."

"I meant about your uncle."

"Him? He was an asshole. He deserved it."

"Jade."

"Sometimes I think that taking him down was Buggles' last act of devotion to me, the ultimate sacrifice."

Tori struggled for something to say. "You know what," she said, "maybe we shouldn't play Truth or Dare."

"Suits me."

"You want to watch a movie?"

"Okay."

.

.

.

They sat together in the bed, watching movies, Jade keeping up a scathing one-woman 'Mystery Science Theater' commentary, Tori giggling along and occasionally offering up a half-hearted defense of whatever travesty was occurring on screen.

"Can I ask you something?"

"Sure."

"You remember a couple of weeks ago? When I asked you if we were friends?"

"And I lied and said we were, so I could get your dirty little secret out of you."

"No you didn't. You didn't even know I _had_ a secret."

"Everyone's got a secret."

"Do you?"

"Nice try. So what about it?"

"What would you have said if I'd asked you say, six months ago?"

""I don't know. Why?"

"I'm just curious. I guess I was just wondering whether we'd always been friends."

"This sound dangerously like 'touchy-feely' stuff to me."

"Go on. I'd like to know how you felt about me."

"Okay, well, I hated you when you started at school, then I tolerated you, then we hung out a little, and, you put on my play and everything, and I guess I thought maybe you were okay."

"Just okay?"

"In small doses."

"I'm flattered."

"Well what do you want me to say?" Jade said. "I'm here, aren't I? _And_ I paid for the pizza."

"What pizza?"

"The one that should be arriving right around…" She looked at her watch. "Now." They heard the door downstairs. Jade grinned. "He knows better than to be late."

"You ordered pizza?"

"Yeah." Jade leaped off the bed and headed downstairs, returning a few minutes later with a large box that filled the room with aroma of pepperoni. "Here we go."

"Thanks," Tori said, smiling. She opened the box and took a slice, hooking her hair behind her ear. "What do I owe you?"

"Your life, and the lives of everyone you know."

"What?"

"Nothing."

They ate in comfortable silence for a while. "So," Jade said, through a mouthful of pizza, "how did you meet him?"

"Who?"

"Ched, or whatever his name is."

"Ted." Tori shrugged. "I went to a party with Trina. He was there."

"You went to a party?"

"Yes," Tori said, affronted. "I do have a social life, you know."

"No you don't. You hang out with Andre and buy dog medicine with Beck."

"No I don't. Well I do, but I do other stuff, too."

"Right. So you were at some lame party, then what happened?"

"We got talking, and he asked me out."

"Why?"

"What do you mean, why?"

"Wasn't there anyone else there he could talk to?"

"Okay, that's it." Tori put her pizza down. "We're playing Truth or Dare."

"I really don't want to-"

"Your turn. Truth."

"What? Don't I get to decide that?"

"Not this time." Tori turned to her. "Do you think I'm attractive?"

Jade hesitated. "What kind of question is that?"

"One I want an answer to."

"Why?"

"Because you just implied that I was so awful that a guy would only talk to me if I was literally – _literally_ \- the last person on earth," Tori said. "And that kind of thing can upset some girls."

"That was a joke. Kind of."

"Was it?"

"Yes."

"So?"

"So?

"So, am I attractive? Yes or no?"

Jade's reddened slightly under Tori's thermal glare. "Well," she started, "I guess some people might…"

"Don't start that again," Tori said. " _You_ , Jade. What do _you_ think?"

Jade's mouth opened and closed a few times. "Ok, fine," she said. "Yes you are." Tori raised an eyebrow. "Not to me, obviously," she added hastily, "but objectively, you know, to a guy, then yes. You're attractive."

"Thank you," Tori said, satisfied.

There was a long pause. "You could say I'm-"

"You _are_ attractive, Jade," Tori said, rolling her eyes. "You know that. And I've never told you you're not. I've never said anything bad about you."

"Really?" Jade said, raising an eyebrow. "Okay, your turn. Truth."

"I thought you didn't-"

"Do you really think I'm 'a mean, vicious person with deep psychological problems'?"

Tori went white. "Who told you that?"

"Andre. He didn't want to, but he felt he had to."

"He felt he _had_ to?"

"… Eventually."

"Oh, God. What did you do to… wait, did he tell you _why_ I said that?"

"No, he had to go see the nurse after that. So? Is that what you think of me?"

"Well," she said, diplomatically, "it depends on your definition of-"

"The truth, Tori. That's the point of the game."

Tori, unable to lie convincingly, crumpled. "Yes," she muttered.

"Gee, thanks."

"Or at least I did," Tori said. "Sometimes. But not anymore."

"Right. So have I changed, or have you changed?"

"What do you mean?"

"I mean, am I a better person now, or do you just see me differently because I'm being nice to you?"

"I'm not sure this counts as being 'nice.'"

"Hey, you're the one flinging insults around."

"I was not!" Tori protested. "I only said that because…"

"Because?"

Tori reddened. "I can't really say."

"Because Andre had the hots for me and you were trying to put him off."

Tori stared at her. "You knew about that?"

"Of course I know about it," Jade said. "You think I can't tell when a guy's got a crush on me?"

"Why didn't you say anything?"

"Because that wouldn't have been very fair to him or Beck, would it?" Jade said. "So what else did you do to try to make him hate me?"

"I didn't try to make him _hate_ you," Tori said. "I just wanted him to see it… wouldn't work."

"So what else did you do?"

"Nothing."

"What else?"

"Nothing. Really."

"I'm going to put these chilies somewhere where they're really going to sting in a minute."

"All right," Tori said. "I dressed up as you and was… kind of mean to him."

"You role-played me?" Jade said, amazed. "Wow. You were lucky he didn't go for it."

"He nearly did," Tori muttered. "I had to fight him off."

Jade snorted with laughter. "I wish I could've seen that," she said. "Maybe next time we go to a fancy dress party, we'll swap and I'll go as you."

"What? No, thank you."

"Why not?"

"Because I know what you'll do."

"What do you mean?"

You'll put on some awful outfit and spend all your time flipping your hair around and saying, 'why, hi there, ah'm Tori Vega' in that stupid voice."

"Yeah. Like I said, I'll go as you."

"I do _not_ talk like that."

"But you're okay with the hair flipping and the awful outfit?"

"I don't flip my hair or wear awful outfits, either!"

"Right," Jade said. "I must be thinking of a different Tori Vega."

"Yes, you must."

They sat in silence for a moment, Tori fuming slightly, Jade smirking. After a moment, she leaned in and nudged Tori. "Go on," she said. "Put it on."

"What?"

"The outfit. The one you wore as me. I want to see it."

"No."

"Go on," Jade coaxed. "It's a sleepover. Dressing up's all part of the fun."

"No."

"Do it."

"No."

"Please?"

She turned, to see Jade's face a mask of puppy-dog pathos. "Ugh," she said. All right."

"Yay. Go, Vega. Blow me away with your acting talent. Make me come alive."

"But don't get mad at me, okay? It was for a good cause."

She disappeared into the closet while Jade sat, eyes wide in gleeful anticipation. A few minutes later she emerged, in a leather jacket, black jeans, and a long black wig, parted badly down the middle, giving her the impression of peeking out from behind a pair of curtains. She spread her hands, sheepishly. "This is it."

After a nod of encouragement from Jade, and face burning with embarrassment, she put one hand awkwardly on her hip in a pose that was supposed to exude 'attitude' but in reality made her look like a badly-made teapot. Jade had to bite her knuckles to keep from laughing.

"Do the voice," she said.

"No."

"Go on."

"You'll laugh."

"I won't laugh. I promise."

Tori sighed. She struck the pose again and took a deep breath as Jade watched expectantly. "Okay," she said, "you wanna…" She lowered the pitch of her voice. "You wanna go see a movie?" she snarled. "Yeah? Well how about 'Death of a Kitten'. Yeah, beef makes me barf, and if you don't like it, then why don't you just go lock yourself in the basement and _cry about it_."

That was too much for Jade, and she dissolved into laughter. "Hey," Tori said. "You said you wouldn't laugh."

There was no answer, as Jade sat with her face pressed against her knees, shoulders shaking. Tori pulled off the wig and threw it at her, but it only set her off all over again. She keeled over onto her side, giggling helplessly.

"Stop that." Tori took of the jacket, and sat down next to her.

"I'm sorry," Jade gasped. "It's just…."

"I thought it was pretty good."

"Really?" Jade sat up, wiping her eyes.

"Well, no, not really," Tori admitted. "But it was the best I could do."

"There's no wonder Andre was smitten."

"I'd like to see you do any better."

"At what? At being me?" Jade said. "I can be me all day long, no problem."

"You're not being very 'you' right now."

"What do you mean?"

Tori smiled a little. "I've never heard you laugh before."

"Hey, I laugh all the time."

"No you don't," Tori said. "You smile, but I've never seen you laugh. Not like that. You were… giggling."

"I was not."

"You were. Like a little girl."

"Yeah. At you."

"So what your saying is, I'm the only one who can make you laugh?"

"I…. Your pizza's going cold."

.

.

.

"So what's he like, old Ned?"

"Ted. He's nice."

"Boy, that really paints the picture, Tori. That really fixes him in my mind's eye. 'Nice'."

"What do you want me to say?"

"Is he tall, short, goofy-looking, handsome, drives a sports car, wears a hat. Has a wooden leg, what?"

"Er…"

"Is he a church-on-Sunday kind of guy, or is he a bad boy? Man, I'd love to see that," Jade grinned. "You on the back of a motorcycle, all in leather."

"You want to see me all in leather?" Tori said in surprise.

"No, I want to see you fall off the back of a motorcycle."

"Ha, ha," Tori said flatly. "No, he's not a bad boy. He's just…" Tori shrugged. "Kind of average, I guess."

"Kind of average," Jade repeated. "Wow, his ears must really be burning now. 'Kind of average'. You know, when you actually come to do the deed, try to come up with something a little more enthusiastic than that afterwards. Guys are kind of funny about that."

"Well, what do you want me to say?" Tori said. "He's just an ordinary guy."

"I want you to say that he drives you mad with passion, that he fills your stomach with butterflies, that you're overcome with lust at the very thought of him. That kind of thing."

The expression on Tori's face said that _'overcome with lust'_ wasn't really a feeling she was familiar with. "I guess I like him… a lot?" she managed.

"Wow," Jade said. "Truly, a love story for the ages."

"Don't mock me," Tori said, defensively. "So, you want to watch another movie?"

"Sure. How about a romance?"

"You like romances?" Tori got up enthusiastically, heading for her movie collection. "What do you want to watch?"

"Do you have… 'Like Story'?"

"What?"

"Or how about, 'P.S. I Like You'?"

"Oh, very funny."

"Like, Actually.'"

"Shut up."

"Eat, Pray, Like'?"

"I mean it."

"Dr Strangelike.'"

"Right, that's it."

"Oh, come on, Tori, can't you… Hey, what are you doing with that pillow? Don't you dare. Don't you dare, Vega, I'm warning you…"

.

.

.

It was two in the morning when Jade awoke, restless and uncertain where she was. It took a few seconds to filter through. Tori's. She was at Tori's house.

And not just in Tori's house. What had she called them? Bed-buddies. She felt an odd shiver at odd intimacy of it, that they gone from frenemies to sharing a bed in the space of a few weeks. She wasn't complaining, she'd had more fun last night with Tori than she could remember, but there was a feeling that something had changed, that they'd never be able to go back to how they were. Did she want to go back? Or was the hand of friendship a vice-like grip, were they now irrevocably 'friends', with all that entailed? With Cat it was different, Cat was, ironically, like a dog - you could do what you liked to her, but as soon as you patted her on the head and said 'Good girl!' she'd just come bouncing back, wagging her tail. It wouldn't be like that with Tori.

She turned her head to look at the sleeping girl beside her. She was on her side, facing away, the silhouette of her body forming gentle hills, rising to the shoulder, dropping to the waist, rising at the hip, falling away into the covers bunched around her feet. _Bed-buddies_. She wondered if she was the first person to ever see her like this, to be allowed to watch her sleep. It felt that way, as though this was some secret twilight world that she'd entered, that Tori had let her into.

But she wouldn't be the last. One day, and one day soon, someone else would be laying here, tracing the contours of her body not with their eyes but with clammy fingers, stroking the slope of her arm in lazy post-coital bliss, reaching for her, taking her by the shoulder, rolling her onto her back, pressing themselves on-

"Fuck." Jade sat bolt upright as a shiver of ice shot through her. Her palms were damp with perspiration, and there was a churning in her stomach that she couldn't identify, a nervous, gnawing sensation that only got worse as she thought about it. She had no idea what it meant, but she couldn't stay here. Not in this bed.

She stood up. She should get dressed, go home. Call Tori in the morning and tell her she'd got sick. But somehow she couldn't, couldn't leave her to wake up to an empty bed. She just have to...

 _Sleep on the floor_. That was it. She'd just sleep on the floor. She could use her bag as a pillow, and if she put her jacket down it would be - well, it would be every bit as comfortable as sleeping on a leather jacket on a hard floor usually was. But that was just the way it was going to have to be. And in the morning she'd say she-

"Jade?"

She froze. Tori was awake, propped up on one elbow, her face in darkness.

"Are you okay?"

"Er... Yeah. I just got too hot."

"Do you want me to open a window?"

"No, it's fine. I'm just going to sleep here."

Tori peered down at Jade's makeshift bed. "You can't sleep on the floor."

"Honestly, it's okay. It's good for your back."

"No it isn't. Come back to bed. I'll turn up the aircon."

"No, really."

"Is it me?" Tori said. "Do I wriggle, or something?"

"It's not you."

"Then what?"

"It's nothing."

"Come on, Jade. What is it? Is there... Oh. Oh, God, I'm sorry. I never thought."

"What?"

"I know you've shared with Cat, but… Look, why don't you take the bed, I'll sleep on the floor."

"No!" Jade's response was more emphatic than either of them had expected. "I mean, there's no need for you to do that."

"But if you're not comfortable sharing with me…"

"I am," Jade insisted. "I don't have a problem with you. Honestly."

"Then what is it?" Tori said. "Come on, Jade. What's wrong?"

There was so much concern in her voice that Jade caved in. "Okay, fine," she said, with a sigh. "It's just that it feels a little... weird, sleeping in the bed where I know you're going to... you know," She felt her jaw tightening. "Do it."

Tori's jaw dropped and she sat back in amazement. "What?"

"It just feels wrong, that's all," Jade said, squirming uncomfortably. "You know. Icky."

"But..." Tori was lost for words. "We haven't actually _done_ it, yet," she said. "How can it be 'icky'?"

"It just is."

"But-"

"Look, it's not you, okay?" Jade said. "I'm not saying there's anything gross about you. It's just… sometimes I have these… I don't know. I can't really explain it, but I'd feel more comfortable sleeping down here."

Tori looked at her for a moment. "No," she said, firmly. "No, no, no. That's not going to happen."

"But-"

"No. If it really bothers you that much, then I promise you that I will never, ever do it in this bed."

Jade stared at her. "What?"

"I mean it," Tori said. "Girl Scout's honor."

"But you can't do that," Jade objected.

"I can and I will."

"Why?"

"Because..." Tori paused. "Because I had a lot of fun tonight, and I'm kind of hoping that we might do it again, that this is that start of something. And if the thought of Ted being here makes you uncomfortable, then I won't do it. I don't want you to feel weird around me. Not now. It's taken a long time for us to get this far, I don't want to spoil it."

"You can't just put your love life on hold for me, Tori."

"I'm not," Tori said. "But I won't do it here. You're more important to me than sex." She frowned. "Heck, I haven't even done it yet, it might be awful. I might never do it again."

"But-"

"Just get yourself back to bed, and I swear to God you'll be the only person I'll ever share it with." Tori flipped back the sheets. "Promise."

Jade climbed back in, hesitantly. "I don't mind Cat," she offered.

"Nope," Tori said. "No one. You are my one and only bed-buddy from now on."

Jade laughed, despite herself. "I don't know what to say."

Tori shuffled back under the covers and turned on her side, her back to Jade. "Yes you do."

She wiggled her fingers, and Jade realized what was expected of her. "Oh, no," she said.

"Yes."

"I am not saying it."

"That's the price."

"No way."

"Say it."

"No."

"Go on, it's easy," Tori said. "I'll even start you off. It begins with 'B'."

Every fiber in Jade's body resisted, but it was no good. She clenched her teeth.

"Fine," she muttered. "We're bed-buddies." And she pulled the sheets over her head to block out the sound of Tori's triumphant giggling.

.

.

.

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	4. Chapter 4 - Beck & Jade & Ted & Tori

**Hi, we're back. For those of you wondering whether Ted is just a figment of Tori's imagination, sadly he isn't.**

 **Many thanks for your reviews, they make it all worthwhile.**

.

.

.

 _Dear Diary_

 _I have just had the strangest night. Guess what happened. You can't can you? No of course you can't, because you're a diary._

 _Jade was here._

 _And yes, I know she's been here before, and I know she's been in my room before, usually rooting through my stuff when I'm downstairs with the guys. But never on her own. Never voluntarily. All right, I know it wasn't exactly her choice, and I kind of persuaded her into it, but she could still have turned me down. But she didn't._

 _She's different on her own. Less spikey. I sometimes think that the fewer people are around us, the more normal she is with me. When it's just me, her and Cat, it's okay, we have this weird 'family' dynamic going on because Cat's like a little kid and we have to look after her, but once the rest of the guys turn up, it's all over. She goes full on, like she's got an act to keep up and the bigger the audience, the more she has to play to it, to stay in character. But that's all it is, a character, because close up, when she was sat next to me on the bed, picking at a scab on her knee, or rubbing at the faded ink on her hand where she's written a note about her homework, she seems so small, so human, that I just want to reach out and hug her._

 _That's not to say she's not still mean, and sarcastic, and demanding, but she's giving, too. She's been really supportive about the whole thing with Ted, and I never expected that. And I wonder if it's difficult for her – she was pretty weird about sleeping in the bed, and I had to promise her I'd never do you-know-what in it, but I don't mind that. I don't mind if I never share this bed with anyone but her. You have no idea what a relief it was to wake up this morning and find she was the one next to me._

 _Because the truth is, I'm terrified. Terrified of waking up one morning next to someone else._

.

.

.

"We're going on a date," Jade announced the following day. Tori blinked.

"What?"

"A date."

"We're dating now?"

"Not me and you, you doofus," Jade said. "Although that would probably be more fun. I mean the four of us. Me and Beck, you and Fred."

"Ted."

"Whatever. Dinner on Saturday night. We want to meet him."

"We?"

"Me."

"Oh. Okay." Tori reached for her phone. "I'll give him a call, see if he's free."

"No need. I already invited him. He's free."

"Wait, what? How?"

"I texted him."

"You don't have his number."

"No. But you do."

"What? But…" Tori's hand slid to her pocket, to find it empty. "You took my phone!"

Jade sighed. "Yeah." She held the offending device out, dangling between her fingers.

"But… Oh, God, what did you write?" Tori snatched it and scrolled frantically through her messages. She found Ted's response, _Sure Babe, let me know what time_ , and looked at the previous entry.

It was, to be fair, not a million miles away from her usual style, which wasn't surprising given that Jade had almost certainly read all her other messages. Except for the part at the end.

"'P.S. you'll like Jade, she's _sooooooooo_ cool'?" she quoted, raising an eyebrow. "Really?"

Jade shrugged. "Well, I am," she said.

"It wasn't the 'cool' bit I was disputing," Tori said, pointedly. "You know I've a good mind to text him back and tell him what you're really like."

"You do that, and you'll be wishing you'd bought a smaller phone."

"What?"

"With no sharp edges."

"Could we just establish, once and for all," Tori said, "that when you threaten to stick inanimate objects up my… into parts of my body, you're actually joking, right?"

"Ask me no questions and I'll tell you no lies."

" _Not_ really the answer I was looking for."

"Hey guys, what's up?" Beck appeared behind Jade, and slid an arm around her waist. She leaned back into him but didn't take her eyes off Tori.

"We're having dinner with Tori and her new boyfriend," she said. "Saturday."

"Her new..? Oh, yeah," Beck said. "Ted, right?"

Tori rolled her eyes. "Does _everyone_ know?"

"'Fraid so."

"Great," Jade said. "Well, that's all settled then."

"Actually," Beck said, "I kind of promised my dad that on Saturday I'd-"

"Well, that's all settled then," Jade repeated. She turned, treating Tori to a tight smile and Beck to a warning glare, and disappeared up the corridor.

"So... Ted," Beck said, eventually. "What's he like?"

"Hmm?" Tori was still staring after Jade. "Oh. He's great. He's just... great."

"Great?"

"Yeah. You know. Just a nice guy."

"Right."

"Don't you start."

"What?"

"I had Jade winding me up all night Saturday because I couldn't think of anything else to say about him."

"Saturday night?"

"At the sleepover."

"What sleepover?"

"Jade came over. She didn't tell you?"

"Er... no," Beck said. "She just said she was busy."

"Oh. Sorry." Tori pulled a face. "I feel kind of guilty now."

"What for?"

"Sleeping with your girlfriend behind your back."

There was a thud as a passing student walked into a door in astonishment. Beck laughed. "You might want to rephrase that."

.

.

.

"Why do you want to meet him so bad?" Tori asked, as they walked through the mall.

"I don't," Jade said. "I don't want to meet him at all."

"Then why are we going out on Saturday?"

"Because I _need_ to meet him," Jade said. "To check whether he's... suitable."

"Suitable?"

"As a boyfriend."

"You're not _actually_ my mom, you know."

"You're right," Jade said, stopping. "Maybe we should call her instead, ask her if you should let him _fmmmmmph ymmmph_." She was cut short by the hand clamped over her mouth.

"Shhh!"

"Do that again, Vega," Jade said, as the hand was removed, "and you'll lose a finger. We're not in school now. None of these people give a crap what you get up to."

"But-"

"Hey, lady!" Jade called to a middle-aged woman passing by. "Do you think she should sleep with her boyfriend?"

"Jade!"

The woman stopped, and looked Tori up and down critically. "I don't know," she said. "Do you love him?"

"Oh, for the love of..." Tori gritted her teeth. "Well, not yet," she started, "but he's a really nice, regular guy-"

"Then no," the woman said, sternly. She adjusted her glasses and peered at Jade. "And you should take all that metal out of your face." She sniffed disapprovingly, and moved on, leaving Tori fuming.

"What did you do that for?"

Jade just grinned broadly, and spread her hands. "What can I say, Tori?" she said. "The people have spoken. Vox Populei, Vox Dei."

"I hate you, Jade West."

"Man, if I had a dollar for every time I've heard that."

.

.

.

"How much?"

"Thirty-seven dollars."

"That's a lot less than I was expecting."

"It only counts if they make it to the end of the sentence."

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.

.

"Will you come over and help me get ready?"

Jade narrowed her eyes. "Why?" she said. "Do you have a problem dressing yourself?"

"No, I just thought it might be fun."

"Your life must be a rollercoaster of pleasure, Tori, considering how many of life's basic functions you count as 'fun'."

"Will you?"

"I guess so. I'll get Beck to pick us up from your house... what, half an hour later?"

"Half an hour?"

"Well how long does it take to get dressed?"

"I want to look my best."

"You've been dating him for months, Tori. It's too late to try and impress him now."

"It's not just for him."

"Oh." Jade raised an eyebrow. " _Ohhh_."

"What?"

"So this is for Beck's benefit, is it?"

"What? No!"

"Or is it for me?"

"It's not for anyone. I just want to look hot."

"Okay. Well in that case I'd better come over the night before, that's going to take at least twenty-four hours."

"Jade."

"I'm sorry, I just can't help myself. I think I must be suffering from some kind of… gank Tourette's."

"Yeah, that, or you're just looking for an excuse to snuggle with me again."

"In your dreams."

"Anyway," Tori said, "if you want to know the truth, I'm a little nervous."

Jade put down her coffee. "Tori," she said, "are you sure you've actually _met_ this guy? This isn't just some dude off the internet, is it?"

"Of course I've met him," Tori said, hotly. "We're dating."

"Are you sure? Because that would explain a lot."

"Like what?"

"Well, the fact you've never introduced him to us, for a start."

"The reason I've never introduced him," Tori said, "is because I know exactly what'll happen if I do."

"What?"

"You'll all stare at him like he's from outer space and make him feel really uncomfortable, and then you'll start making snarky comments about how he must be blind or mad, and then Robbie will make Rex say something really inappropriate, and Cat will start babbling about her brother, and before you know it he'll think we're a bunch of freaks and never want to see me again."

Jade sat back, stunned. "So you're _ashamed_ of us?" she said.

"No," Tori said. "Well, not you and Beck, obviously, or Andre, but…"

"I am shocked, Tori Vega. Deeply shocked," Jade said. "I always thought you were Little Miss Tolerance. You know, each to his own, seeing the good in everyone."

"I am!" Tori protested. "I do."

"Yeah, right. As long as it doesn't interfere with you getting laid."

"It's not like that."

"I mean, _I'm_ embarrassed to be seen with you guys, obviously-"

"Gee, thanks."

"-but that's just me. I always thought you were different."

"You're not going to tell them, are you?"

"You mean the next time Robbie offers to help you out with your theater course, or Cat runs you up an outfit, or you flutter your eyelashes at Sinjin to get him to do something for you? No, I'm not going to mention it at all."

Tori breathed a sigh of relief.

"Thank you."

Jade rolled her eyes. "That was sarcasm, you dunce."

"Oh."

"But no I won't."

"Why not?"

Jade grinned. "Because sometimes, Tori, it's nice to know that you're not as sweet as you pretend to be."

.

.

.

"This one?"

"No."

"This one?"

"No."

"What about this? I think this one's pretty hot."

"Yeah, it is."

"Great!"

"So, no."

"What? Why not?"

"Because I am not taking you out to dinner looking like a hooker."

"I don't look like a hooker! Anyway, you're not taking me out, Ted's taking me out."

"Yeah. And Ted's already punching way above his weight, so he's not going to appreciate it if everyone in the place is drooling over you. Pick something else."

There was a long pause.

"He's punching above his weight?"

"Well, I'm guessing he is," Jade shrugged. "Because he sounds pretty average."

"Are you saying I'm… above average?"

"What? No."

"Yes you are."

"Okay, fine. You're above average."

"You do realize that's a compliment, right?"

"Don't get overexcited. I'm not going to make a habit of it."

"So, what do you think?" Tori maneuvered Jade towards the mirror and stood beside her. "Are we hot, or not?"

They stood together, Tori in an blue dress with a dropped shoulder, Jade in strapless black. Jade poked at a stray curl of hair and nodded. "I guess we are."

"Damn right we are."

"Although it'll be totally wasted on those two. They'd be more impressed if we turned up naked carrying a six-pack each."

"Jade."

"What?"

"That's my boyfriend you're talking about."

"Sorry."

"And yours."

"Meh."

.

.

.

"So, you must be Jade."

The bustle of the restaurant surrounded the four of them as they made their introductions, and she took her first look at Ted. She'd assumed Tori was being vague when she'd described him as 'nice', but it turned out she'd been bang on the money. Ted was a nice guy. That was what he was. A nice, ordinary, average, regular guy, and Jade hated him on sight. Not because he was unsuitable for Tori, but because he was way _too_ suitable, he was exactly the kind of inoffensive, bland boy that Tori's mom had probably always dreamed of. She could see them now, a long-distance but monogamous relationship through college, and then the wedding - a tasteful affair, Tori resplendent in white lace, Ted in a morning suit, toasting the bride's parents as Holly blushed and David looked proudly on - and then settling down, him in middle-management, probably in his dad's company, Tori would put her singing career on hold to have a couple of kids, and they'd all live happily ever after, sinking into the waters of history without a single ripple, just a stream of silver bubbles barely breaking the surface.

Ted was still waiting, hand outstretched. She took it. "Yes," she said.

"It's great to meet you," Ted said. "Tori's told me a lot about you."

There was a muffled groan from somewhere in Tori's direction. "Has she?"

"Oh, yeah," Ted said. He smiled. "Although not as much as she's told me about this _other_ girl called Jade, who-"

"Why don't we go and sit down?" Tori said, brightly. "With some drinks. And less talking."

The waiter appeared, to usher them towards their booth. The girls took the inside seats and sat facing each other, their respective dates next to them. Beck ordered some drinks without asking Jade what she wanted, which always annoyed her, and they settled down to the awful grind of small talk.

"So, Ted," Jade said. "What do you do?"

"Well," he began, and Jade switched off. She couldn't care less what he did, she just wanted to see Tori's reaction to it. She was nodding and smiling, and Jade expected her to break in at any moment with a particularly impressive aside - '... and Ted's won the Inter-School Award for Competitive Organ Donation, haven't you Ted?' - but she didn't, and it soon became clear that she wasn't really listening, either. In fact, judging by the way her eyes kept flickering towards the other side of the table, it looked as though she was more concerned with Jade's reaction.

"... heuristic business models at a molecular level," Ted was saying, setting off bullshit detectors all over the Greater Los Angeles area. He paused, as a waiter came over. "Ah, food!"

Ted was nothing if not observant, Jade mused. He'd manage to pick Jade out of a line-up of two potential candidates, one of which was a guy, and now he'd effortlessly identified 'food'. The man was a marvel.

The arrival of food took some of the pressure off conversation by giving them something else to occupy their mouths. Beck and Ted had both ordered steak, Tori had ordered the first date's worst nightmare, spaghetti, and Jade had ordered lobster. Not that she particularly like seafood, but it was expensive and Beck was paying, plus she was planning on saving the carcass in order to try out an escalation of the 'shrimp in the bra' trick on Tori.

She leaned back a little and studied the body language. There was none between Tori and Ted, or if there was, it was all one-sided - occasionally Ted would flash her a smile, and put his hand casually on her knee, at which point Tori would freeze and stare at her plate until it was removed again. She wasn't sure if it was because Tori had a phobia about showing public affection, or just a phobia about Ted. Or possibly knees. If anyone looked as though they were on a date, it was Ted and Beck. They were hunched toward each other over their food, laughing about something, possible speedway racing, which Jade had expressed a very brief interest in until Beck had assured her that there were actually very few accidents. Beck had an ability and willingness to talk to anyone about anything, a trait which Jade had initially secretly admired, but now secretly hated, and Ted for his part seemed relieved to have found an unexpected ally in a social situation that he must have been dreading. After a while it seemed to dawn on Beck that he was hogging their guest, but this only lead to a conversation _about_ Tori, rather than with her, while Tori just looked up occasionally when she heard her name and smiled politely.

Jade decided to alleviate the boredom. She waited until the two guys were deep in discussion, before she nudged Tori under the table. "Tori," she murmured. "Hey, Tori."

"Hmmm?" Tori said absent-mindedly, still trying to catch Beck and Ted's conversation.

"Do I have food on my face?"

Tori looked up to see Jade, wearing an expression of serious enquiry, with an entire lobster claw stuck to her forehead, and snorted with laughter, sending spaghetti sauce shooting out of her nose. Horrified, she grabbed at a napkin and clamped it to her face, looking around in panic. Jade let the claw fall back to her plate with a damp spat. "Oh, yeah, there it is." She dabbed at her face as the other two turned to stare at Tori in surprise. "Are you okay, babe?" Ted said, concerned.

"I'm fine," Tori muttered furiously through the napkin, still glaring at Jade over the top of it. "I just… I just need to go to the bathroom." She stood and shuffled her way past Ted, still clutching the napkin over her nose.

"I'll come with," Jade volunteered, standing on the seat and leaping over a confused Beck. She set off after Tori.

"What the hell did you do that for?" Tori demanded angrily, as soon as they were in the ladies room. "Look at me!"

Tori looked as though she'd suffered the world's most epic nosebleed. "I'm sorry," Jade said. "I just thought you looked a little bored, that's all."

"Bored? Jesus, Jade, I am so gonna… Oh my God."

"What?"

Tori peered at her nose in the mirror. "I think there's an actual piece of spaghetti up there."

"Want me to pull it out?"

"No, I don't want you to pull it out!"

"Just trying to help."

"Well don't! You've done enough damage as it is. Go back to the table."

"I gotta take a wazz."

"Then go wazz."

Jade disappeared into a stall. When she returned, Tori was cleaned up, and staring at herself in the mirror.

Not admiring herself, not fixing her hair or make-up, not checking for the remnants of spaghetti sauce. Just… staring.

Jade hovered, just out of sight. _What does she see when she looks in the mirror?_ she wondered. _Does she see beauty? Does she see worth? Or does she see herself as a commodity, clinging on to the one thing she thinks she's worth to Ted, wondering when to play her only card, knowing that if she holds on to it too long its value will be lost and the game will be over?_

 _And her only friend, her only ally, just made her look like an idiot._

"I'm sorry."

Tori turned to look at her.

"I really am," she said, sincerely. "I didn't mean to make you look bad, I just wanted to cheer you up. I didn't realize you'd… explode."

Tori looked back at the mirror, and sighed. "I guess."

"Look, Tori, why don't we just get out of here," she said, "forget all this and go somewhere else, have some fun. Just me and you. What do you say?"

For a moment she thought she saw a glimmer of light in hazel eyes, but reality quashed it. "What about Beck and Ted?"

"Beck wouldn't mind."

"I'm pretty sure Ted would."

"He's talking, he probably wouldn't even-"

"No," Tori said, firmly. "This was your idea. You wanted to meet him. So get back in there and make like a normal human being. You owe me that."

"But-"

"Go on. Scoot."

Jade sighed. "Okay, fine," she said.

"And be nice to him."

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.

.

They retook their seats. "Everything all right?" Beck asked.

"Yep. All good," Jade said, to prevent any further questions. At a look from Tori, she turned to Ted. "So, Ted," she said. "You were saying something earlier about… stuff."

Ted didn't need much prompting. "Oh, yeah," he said enthusiastically. "Well, basically, I was saying there was a synergistic relationship between…"

Jade rested her chin on her hands and adopted an expression of polite interest as Ted droned on. She wondered briefly if this was how Ted had snared Tori, if he'd simply talked her into submission, or if she genuinely found him interesting. Which raised the question – what _did_ Tori like? Jade had assumed she'd like Beck, and it had once seemed an almost foregone conclusion that eventually Jade would lose him to her. But after their initial flirtation, she'd kept her distance. She'd frothed like a twelve-year-old over Ryder, so maybe she liked bad boys after all, but then again Danny had been a nice guy. What did Tori want? What did Tori _need_?

She was still pondering the question when she felt something soft brush against her leg. She twitched, and it disappeared. She glanced around quickly, but no one else seemed to have noticed, and she was pretty sure that if there _was_ something like a rat running around under the table Tori would have hit the roof. It would have to be a heck of a big rat, too, to reach that far up her leg. She relaxed. It was probably just her imagination, a tactile hallucination brought on by the almost hypnotic boredom. But then it happened again, a soft stroke on her inner calf, gentle but insistent. She looked at Beck, but he had his arms folded on the table, and he'd have to dislocate his knee to reach her with his foot. She felt a sudden terror as she looked back at Ted. He wouldn't dare, would he? And then she looked at Tori.

Tori was concentrating on her food, hair hooked behind her ears, but there was a faint, secretive smile on her lips. It was _her_. Tori was playing footsie with her. She froze in shock. And it dawned on her that this was Tori's revenge. There was nothing she could do – she couldn't move her legs out of reach, so her only choice was to kick the other girl hard enough to make her stop, or to call her out on it in front of Ted. She swallowed dryly, and felt her face burning. Not just because it was a shocking breach of her touch-taboo, but because the feeling of Tori's bare foot against her skin was doing very strange things to her insides.

And then Tori looked up, and the expression on her face was so intense, so _wanton,_ that it hit Jade's libido like a steam-train. Her mouth fell open and for a moment she didn't seem able to breath.

"Hey, are you okay?" Beck asked. She turned to him, wide-eyed with confusion. "Er… " she croaked. And as quickly as it had started, it was over. The foot withdrew and Tori returned to her dinner with a sly grin and suddenly the Latina's attention was elsewhere, chatting to Ted and Beck, the incident forgotten, and all Jade could do was sit, speechless, the tingle still on her skin. She didn't know what to make of it, but she knew two things – one, she hadn't even _tried_ to move her leg, and two…

The dreams. The dreams were going to get a whole lot worse.

.

.

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 **So, what do you think? Ted seems like a blast, doesn't he? Let's hope he falls down a well.**


	5. Chapter 5 - The Elephant in the Room

**Hi there, how's things? Long time no see. I know I said I was probably done, but I thought it seemed unfair not to finish this, so I thought I'd try and see it through. I can't promise how long it'll be, or how soon it'll be, but I'll give it a go. I also have a question to ask you at the end.**

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For some time, Jade had had a recurring dream. She's sitting at the edge of a lake - the lake is vast, the other side lost in mist, and yet its waters are smooth. Idly, she picks a lily and drops it onto the surface, and watches as the ripples spread out, until they dissipate and the water is once again perfectly still.

Only it isn't. Somewhere there's a current, because as she watches the lily begins to move, slowly, away from her, and she makes a note to catch it, to retrieve it before it goes too far, before it's lost. But just as she goes to pluck it from the water, there is a distraction - the sound of a bird, the rumble of thunder, childish laughter - and when she looks back the lily has crossed that invisible boundary and is now out of reach, and all she can do is sit and watch as it drifts further and further away, visible and yet lost forever.

Man, what she wouldn't give to be having that dream right now, instead of the god-awful horror show that assailed her every night.

Tori and Ted. Tori _with_ Ted. Tori and Ted holding hands. Tori and Ted making out. Tori skipping naked through fields of golden wheat, pursued by a laughing Ted sporting a boner the size of a baseball bat. Sometimes she found herself a disembodied presence, floating above the bed, watching Ted's ass humping up and down with a terrible determination as Tori writhed and squealed below, looking up at her over his shoulder, fixing Jade with a grin and a knowing wink.

 _I was worth waiting for._

Her gut writhed as she hung there, wordless and impotent, unable to intervene, or even to look away.

And all the time she could feel it, a trail of hot fire branded on the inside of her leg, like the mark of Cain.

.

.

.

So," Tori said excitedly, the following day, "what do you think?"

Jade was in no mood for this, after a restless and increasingly frustrating night. "About what?"

"Ted."

"What about him?"

"What did you think?"

"About what?"

"About Ted."

"What about him?"

"What did you think?"

"About what?"

"Jade!"

"I dunno. He was fine, I guess."

"fine?"

"Well, what do you want me to say?" Jade said, irritably. "He's just a guy. They're all the same."

There was a long and uncomfortable silence.

"I'm right here, you know," Beck said from across the table. Jade rolled her eyes.

"Okay, apart from Beck, they're all the same."

"Ahem."

"All right, apart from Beck and Andre, they're-"

"Er…"

"Jesus. Okay, fine. Apart from Beck, and Andre and Robbie-"

"And me!"

"That doesn't even make sense, Cat. You're not a guy."

"I know," Cat pouted. "I just didn't want to get left out."

"Okay," Jade sighed, "apart from everyone sat round this table right now, including, for some bizarre reason, Cat, most guys are all the same."

"What about Sinjin?"

"I'm talking about normal guys."

Robbie's face scrunched up as he tried to work out where he sat in this Venn diagram of location and normality. Under the table, he gave a tiny fist pump _. 'Yes'._ The bell rang, and he sprang up. "Well, I guess us _normal_ guys had better get to class," he said. "Who's with me, chaparinos?"

Beck slunk reluctantly to his feet. "Yeah, I'm there." Andre and Cat rose too, and headed off into the school, leaving Tori and Jade at the table. Jade's scowl deepened, until Tori finally had to ask.

"Are you mad about something?"

"No."

"Yes you are."

"Okay, yes I am."

"What is it?"

"You. Last night. Under the table."

"What do you mean?"

"You know very well what I mean."

"Oh, that," Tori said. "I was only tickling you."

"You were not _tickling_ me, Tori." Jade dropped her voice as heads turned. "You were playing footsie with me."

"I was not!"

"Yes you were. And that is just..." She struggled for words to sum up the enormity of the crime. "Highly inappropriate."

"Oh, come on," Tori protested. "I was just trying to put you off while you were talking to Ted."

"Put me off?" Jade said. "If you wanted to put me off you could have just pulled a face or something. Not started... rubbing me."

"I was not rubbing you!"

"Yes you were. Look, if you want to get jiggy under the table, do it with your boyfriend. I'm sure it'll get his ball rolling."

"I don't need to get his ball rolling," Tori muttered. "I can practically see his 'ball rolling' through his pants."

"Tori!"

"What?"

"I'm eating, here."

"Sorry."

"What I'm saying is, there are some things you just don't do, and that's one of them. How you would feel if I just came over and grabbed your ass?"

The was a pause. "What, if it was _you_ , or just-"

"Jesus Christ, Tori. Are you sure you even want to date a guy?"

"What do you mean?"

"Because you're coming across as awfully gay, right now."

Tori's reaction wasn't quite what she'd expected. She grabbed her things, stuffed them in her bag, and walked away without a word, leaving Jade open-mouthed and befuddled.

.

.

.

She caught up with Tori at locker. "Hey," she said, "what's with you?"

Tori turned on her.

"You think I'm gay?" she demanded.

"What? No, of course not."

"That's what you said."

"That was just a joke!"

"A joke?"

"Yeah," Jade said. "A joke. Like if I'd said, 'are you sure you want to be a singer? Because your voice sure sounds like a bag of cats being fed through a mincing machine'."

"My voice does not… that's not even remotely the same thing!" Tori said. "You can't equate being gay with the sound of cats being put through a mincing machine! Cats in a mincer is a _bad_ thing, Jade. No one ever marched for the right to mince cats."

"Jeez. I don't get why you're being so antsy about it. You were the one saying you wanted me to grab your ass."

"I didn't say I _wanted_ you to do it," Tori snapped. "I was just saying I might tolerate a certain amount of ass-grabbery from you in a... friendly, inoffensive way."

"There is no inoffensive way to grab someone's ass, Tori. It's practically the definition of offensive."

"I'm sure there is."

"Really? Go try it in the girls' locker room, let me know how it works out for you."

Tori's lips pursed, and Jade sensed she'd strayed into a minefield. "Tori?" she said. "Hey, what is it?"

"Nothing."

"Come on, Tori. I insult you all the time, and you're usually pretty cool with it. What is it about the whole gay thing?"

Tori took a deep breath, and then pushed a book into her locker with an angry shove. "Because that's what they used to say about me at Sherwood."

Jade blinked. "They thought you were gay?"

"I don't know whether they thought it, but they sure as hell _said_ it."

"But why?"

"I don't know, Jade," Tori said, furiously. "Why did you dump coffee on my head? Why does Trina beat up on Robbie? Because kids are awful, nasty little shits who can't wait to pick on someone."

"Christ, Tori, I didn't-"

"It was _hell_ , Jade," Tori went on. "People saying things behind my back. People saying them to my _face._ People writing them on the wall of the girls' room. People making jokes about me. All the goddamn time. Even when I dated Danny it didn't stop. They just said I was using him to cover up, said he was my... moustache."

"I think it's 'beard'."

"Whatever! I used to dread it sometimes, I used to pretend to be sick so my mom would let me stay home. but you know what the worst part was? Do you?"

Jade groaned. "Tori..."

"Yeah, _that's_ right," Tori said, with grim satisfaction. "The locker room."

"Look, I was only-"

"Do you know what it's like," she fumed, "sharing a changing room with a bunch of girls, all giggling and nudging each other? 'Don't drop your towel, Marnie, Vega's got her eye on you.' Jesus Christ. I thought at least here it'd be different, that no one would care what you did."

"No one _does_ care."

"Well, you obviously do, otherwise you wouldn't use it as a put-down."

"I didn't mean it like that!"

"Yeah, right."

"I didn't!"

"Then why say it at all?"

"Because I was just trying to get a rise out of you."

"No, Jade, you were just trying to make me feel bad."

"I really wasn't," Jade said, exasperated. "Look, I get it. I'm sorry. I'm totally sorry. I didn't know about Sherwood, I didn't know about any of that. It was just a stupid remark, that's all. I didn't mean to hurt you. You believe me, don't you?"

Tori folded her arms defiantly, determined to hold on to her grievance, and said nothing.

"Don't you?" Jade pressed, cranking up the sincerity, but still Tori stood firm. "Do you really think I'd do that?"

Still nothing, but the cracks were beginning to show. Jade decided it was time to use the F-bomb.

"To a friend?"

There was a long pause, and Tori finally succumbed. "I guess not," she said, reluctantly.

"There you go," Jade said. "So, how about we roll back about a half-hour, and pretend this never happened. What do you say?"

"I-"

"Good girl. You know it makes sense." She pulled the other girl into a hug before she could object, a move so unexpected Tori was forced to return it out of sheer surprise.

"You do realize," Tori mumbled after a moment, from somewhere in Jade's hair, "that this isn't going to work _every_ time you want to get around me."

"I don't know what you mean."

"Hmm."

And so things returned to normal, disaster averted. But there were no more sleepovers, no more sharing. They found themselves sitting a little further apart, hugging a little less, breaking contact a little sooner, as though each was afraid that too much contact would disturb the other. Neither could have told you why, but there was a weird, unspoken feeling that they'd brought an elephant into the room, and now it sat heavy on the bed.

.

.

.

 _Two weeks later…_

Jade lay, curled on her side, staring at the wall of the RV. Beside her, Beck lay snoring, his reserve of pillow talk having run out a few months into their relationship. She hated this RV. It had once represented freedom, but she'd soon come to realize it represented Beck's freedom, not hers, Beck's freedom to do as he liked, to screw his girlfriend any time he wanted on his parents driveway. A teenage boys wet dream. But there was nothing of hers in here, nothing to suggest that she was anything other than just another fixture in the Fratmobile. She refused to try and tidy it up, to put her stamp on it, because she couldn't bear the thought of slipping into that role.

Her phone rang. She grasped at it, blearily. Eleven-thirty. Late, but not 'Emergency Room' late. She squinted. _Tori._

"Hello."

"Jade?" The voice was low, and strangely echoey.

"What?"

"I know it's late, but…"

"What? What is it?"

"Ted's here."

"Look, if this is about what I said the other day, you don't need to prove anything to me. I get it, okay?"

"No, it's not that."

"Then what?"

"It's just… I don't know what to do."

"Oh, God, Tori, please don't tell me you want me to give you instructions over the phone."

"What? No!"

"Because you're going to have to wear a headset or put me on speaker, either way that's going to be a little weird."

"Jade!"

"Or maybe kind of kinky, I dunno."

"Shut up!" Tori's voice was peevish. "I don't need advice on how to do it, I need advice on how _not_ to do it."

"What?"

"I can't get rid of him."

"You've lost me."

"I told him my folks are away, and he came over, and now he's kind of drunk, and-"

"Whoa, whoa!" Jade sat up, suddenly. "Is he hassling you?"

"No! No. It's just... I don't know what to do, every time I say it's getting late he just starts grinning like I'm saying it's time to… you know."

"For God's sake, Tori, you don't have to take that. Just tell him to fuck off."

"I don't want to tell him to fuck off!"

"Why not?"

"Because that's not very nice, is it?"

"'Nice' isn't really what I was aiming for, Tori, if he's trying to pressure you into sex."

"He isn't!" Tori said. "It's just awkward, that's all. I just need to think of some kind of subtle excuse to get him to go home without making a big deal out of it."

"Tell him it's that time of the month."

"What time of the month?"

" _That_ time."

"I can't do that!"

"Why not?"

"I just can't. Anyway I can't use that excuse every week, he's going to think I'm some kind of freak."

Jesus." Jade shook her head. "Okay, we'll be right over."

"We?"

"I'm at Beck's. He'll have to drive me, I left my car at home." She cut off the call. "Beck." She nudged her companion in the ribs. "Hey, Oliver."

"Mmm?"

"We gotta go over to Vega's."

"What? Why?"

"Because Ted's over there, making an asshole of himself."

"Ted?"

"Yeah, your little pal Ted. He's trying to get laid."

"Good luck to him," Beck muttered, rolling over and going back to sleep. The jab in the ribs he got this time was enough to knock him out of bed. "Ow!"

"What the fuck is wrong with you?" Jade said. "She's supposed to be your friend!"

"I know , but-"

"Are you happy to just sit here on your fat ass while some drunken monkey gets his paws all over her?"

"Monkeys don't have paws."

"Don't fuck with me, Oliver."

"Honestly, Jade, why do you care so much? Tori's a big girl, Ted's her boyfriend, let them sort it out for once. You don't have to keep interfering."

"I'm not interfering," Jade said hotly. "I'm trying to help."

"Why?"

"Because she asked me to!"

"She asked you to?"

"Yeah, she did. She wanted my advice."

"Right. And your qualified to give relationship advice, are you?"

"What the hell is that supposed to mean?"

"Nothing." Beck sighed again. "Come on. I'll drive you."

.

.

.

Tori opened the door with a brittle smile. "Hey!" she announced loudly. "Hi!" She turned to Ted, who was slumped casually on the sofa, surrounded by beer cans. "Look who it is!"

"Who?"

"These guys!" She stepped back and waved her hands at Beck and Jade as though expecting a drum roll. "Beck and Jade," she clarified, when Ted seemed to be struggling to focus. "You know. My friends. You met them the other night."

"Oh." Ted looked distinctly unthrilled. "Hey."

"Wow." Tori turned back to the door, as though their arrival was the most exciting thing that had ever happened to her. "It's great to see you. How are you guys? I haven't seen you since-"

"Yesterday," Jade supplied.

"-yesterday," Tori echoed, glaring at her. "Gosh. Really? It seems like longer. Much longer." She stood back. "So, why don't you come in? Why don't you come right on in. Just right on in. In here. Come in. Into my house. Please."

Jade sighed and pushed past her, Beck smiling apologetically.

"We were just passing," Jade said. "On our way to-"

"Go bowling," Beck said.

Ted frowned. "Bowling?" he said. "At this time of night?"

Jade glared at Beck. "He meant the movies."

"He said bowling."

"Yeah, well, he's Canadian. That's what they call the movies up there."

"They call the movies 'bowling'?"

"Yeah."

"So what do they call bowling?"

"I dunno, _Beck_ ," Jade said, turning on him. "What do they call bowling in Canada?"

"Er," Beck floundered. "We call it... Ten Pin Wahooey."

"Ten Pin Wahooey," Jade said, flatly. "Wow. Those crazy Canucks. So what do you say? You guys up for Ten-Pin Wahooey? I mean bowling. I mean, the movies."

Ted reached up from his place on the sofa and patted Tori's leg with a little too much familiarly for Jade's liking. "Nah," he slurred. "We're good. Aren't we babe?"

This left them at something of an impasse, and it was clear that desperate measures were called for. Jade took a deep breath.

"I gotta go take a wazz," she announced, and disappeared up the stairs.

.

.

.

Jade had only been gone a few seconds when Tori's phone buzzed. She pulled it out and looked at it. A text, from Jade.

 **Put me on speaker.**

She was still staring blankly at it when the phone buzzed again. Jade. A call, this time. Suddenly the text made sense. She put it on speaker. "Hello?" she said, tentatively.

"Hi, honey." A passable imitation of Holly Vega's voice filled the room. "It's mom."

Tori blinked. "Mom?"

"Yes, mom." There was a touch of irritability in the voice.

Tori struggled for a moment, wondering why on earth Jade was prank-calling her in the middle of a crisis, but felt helpless to do anything other than go along with it. "Mom!" she said. "Hi, mom. Er... how's dad?"

"Who?"

"Dad. You know, dad."

"Oh. He's fine, honey. Just fine. Look, there's been a problem with the flight to... wherever we were going, so we're just going to have to turn right around and come home."

"Home?"

"Yes, honey. Home. Where you are right now. Our house."

"Right. Er..."

"So the place had better be super tidy, I don't want any mess."

Slowly the whole charade finally dawned on Tori. "Tidy!" she said. "Gosh, yes. It's really tidy."

"And you'd better not have any friends around. You know how I feel about having people in my house."

"No friends, got it."

"Except for that nice Jade girl. I like her, she's-"

"I'm on it, mom!" Tori shut of the call quickly. She looked up at Beck's barely concealed amusement, and cleared her throat. "That was my mom," she said.

"Your mom," he said. "Wow."

Jade reappeared. "What did I miss?"

It took a few seconds for Tori to realize that Jade wasn't supposed to have heard any of that. "My mom called," she said. "She's coming home."

"Oh. My. God." Jade said, dramatically, turning to Ted, who was still slumped on the sofa. "We gotta get out of here!"

"Huh?"

"Tori's mom coming home!"

"Ur..."

"And she really hates people. I mean _really_ hates them. Especially in her house. Isn't that right, Tori? Except me, obviously."

Tori rolled her eyes. "Obviously."

"And her dad's even worse. Man, is he a grouch."

Beck picked up an empty can. "Especially if you've been drinking his beer," he said, casually. The first alarm bells began to ring for Ted. "What?"

"Mr Vega," Beck went on. "He's pretty touchy about his beer. Got a thing about it. Gets real pissed if anyone touches it."

"Super pissed," Jade agreed. "And he's a cop. You are one brave guy, Ted, drinking Papa Vega's booze. You've got balls, I'll give you that. It's a pity you're gonna be wearing them round your-"

That was enough for Ted, and he began to struggle to his feet. "I think I'd better go," he mumbled, grasping at Tori for support.

"That's right. Run, Ted, run," Jade said, gleefully. "As fast as your legs can carry you."

This turned out to be not very fast. He swayed, dangerously, until Beck took pity on him. "Come on, Ted," he said. "We'll give you a ride home."

Ted looked at him, slightly unfocused. "I thought you guys were going to watch a wahooey, or something?"

"Another time, Ted. Another time." He turned to Jade. "You ready?"

"Yeah. Actually... I thought I might hang on here for a while, help Vega tidy up a little." She pointed at the stack of beer cans. "You know, with her mom coming home soon, and everything."

Beck raised an eyebrow, but the look in her eye said, _don't push me on this_. He sighed. Okay," he said. "Give me a call if you need me to come get you." He flung an arm round an unsteady Ted. "Come on, buddy. Let's get you back to the shack, so you can hit the sack. See you, Tori." And he hustled a compliant Ted out through the front door into the night, leaving Jade and Tori alone, looking at each other.

After a few seconds there was a loud crash. They both winced. "The lawnmower," Tori explained.

"Ah."

Another crash told them a lawnchair had also met an unfortunate end, in Beck's epic battle to steer Ted to the car. "So," Jade said, "we'd better get tidied up before your mom comes home." She made a move towards the sofa.

"My mom's not coming home. You just made that up."

"Oh, yeah." Jade shrugged. "Well, let's do it anyway."

.

.

.

"Thanks," Tori said, after a while, as they finished clearing up and pummelling life back into the cushions where Ted had been overcome by gravity and alcohol.

"It was only a few beer cans, Tori."

"No, I mean for coming over. For... rescuing me."

"What can I say? I'm just a good Samaritan. Anyway, it's good for my karma. You might find this hard to believe Tori, but I haven't always been the paragon of virtue you see before you."

Tori snorted. "Is that right."

"It is," Jade said, unfazed. "I have been known, on occasion, to be a little mean."

"You? Surely not."

"It's true. I need to atone for my sins."

"By putting a few cans in the trash?"

"Well, you've got to start somewhere. Anyway, I don't want to overdo it, I'm not Mother Theresa. I still don't see why you couldn't have just booted his ass out."

"Because I didn't want to get into an argument, that's why. I hate arguing."

"You're always arguing."

"I am not."

"You see?"

"Very funny. Anyway, I don't mind arguing with you, that different."

"Because I'm always right."

"That is very much _not_ the reason."

"Oh."

"The point is, I didn't want things to get awkward. I said he could come over, I even gave him a beer. I just didn't think he'd be so..."

"...much of an asshole?"

"Unmovable."

"So you invited him over while your parents were out, plied him with alcohol, and you wonder why he might think his luck was in? Words fail me."

"It's not my fault. I guess just underestimated how irresistible I am."

Yeah, right," Jade scoffed.

"What?"

"A drunk teenage boy'll screw anything that moves, Tori. And a lot of things that won't. You're lucky you didn't come back from taking a wazz and find him with his dick in your mom's pot pie."

Tori pulled a face. "Gross."

"Or even in your mom."

"Jade!"

"Hey, guys go for older women. It's that whole 'Mrs. Robinson' thing."

"You do realize I'll never be able to sit down to dinner with my family again now, don't you?"

"No need to thank me."

"I wasn't."

"Well if that's your attitude, maybe I should call Beck, get him to bring laughing-boy back over here for round two."

"Don't you dare!"

Jade grinned.

"Although now he's going to be absolutely terrified of my dad."

"That's a good thing," Jade said. "All guys should be terrified of their girlfriend's dad."

"Is Beck scared of your dad?"

"Damn right."

"Wow. I never had him down as being scary. A little cold and judgmental, maybe, but not scary."

"That's because you don't know that he's an ex-Navy Seal, and that he knows twelve different ways to kill a man with his bare hands."

"Really?"

"No. The only way my dad could kill anyone is through sheer boredom. He knows a heck of a lot about tax law." She shrugged. "But Beck thinks he can, and that's good enough for me."

"You told Beck your dad was a trained killer?"

"No, I specifically told him he _wasn't,"_ Jade said, "and that he should never, ever mention it to anyone, ever. Especially my dad."

"You are a terrible person."

"Yeah."

They finished tidying in pleasant silence.

"It's really late," Tori said. She bit her lip. "Do you... want to stay over?"

Jade huffed. "Well I guess I'm going to _have_ to, now Beck's abandoned me."

"But you told him to-"

"So yeah, I will."

"Well... okay." Tori hesitated. "I can make up the spare room, if you want, or…"

"No, it's fine."

"Are you sure? I mean, it's not a problem-"

"I _said_ , it's fine," Jade said. She shrugged. "Unless you're going to start snoring again."

"I don't snore!"

"Really? Then you need to call pest control."

"Why?"

"I think you've got a nest of warthogs in your room."

And with that, the elephant was gone. They grabbed a couple of sodas and a bag of chips, and headed upstairs.

.

.

.

Jade lay awake, staring at the sleeping form beside her. Somehow, this felt right. Disturbing right. She never felt comfortable next to Beck, particularly in the RV, and maybe it was because this bed was softer, and bigger, and Tori's slight frame took up less of it, but she resisted a sudden urge to snuggle down, curl herself around the contours of Tori's sleeping back, put an arm around her. And that was not right. That was _definitely_ not right. _Jesus, West_. Maybe she was just feeling protective, although she didn't know why. She sometimes felt protective of Cat, but that was because Cat was a few cents short of a dollar - when Jade had said she was basically a pet, it hadn't been so much a criticism as an acknowledgement of responsibility. Tori, on the other hand, was very much her own person, and although she could be as scatty as hell sometimes, she was still capable of standing up for what was right, giving as good as she got. And yet here she was, rushing halfway across town in the middle of the night to stop her from...

From what? Making a fool of herself? Falling out with Ted? Or just to make damned sure she didn't do the other thing?

From beside her there was faint snuffling sound. She looked across to see that a stray strand of hair had fallen across the other girl's face. Every time she breathed out, it puffed up in the air, only to drift back into place, tickling her nose and making it twitch. Jade watched for a moment, then reached across and gently brushed it to one side.

Best not to think about it too much, she decided. She reached down and scratched absent-mindedly at her leg, before she rolled over and closed her eyes, slowly sinking into a deep and, for once, dreamless sleep.

.

.

.

 **Not sure the elephant's gone, so much as just moved into Jade's spare room.**

 **So the big question is, does anyone still want Jori? Is it still a thing, or have we all moved on? I've nothing else to offer you in the way of fanfic, I'm afraid, I've never really got into other ships, but at the same time I don't want to end up playing to an empty theater.**


	6. Chapter 6 - Happy Families

**Hi, we're back. Wow, that was a lot of reviews, thank you so much -** **it's good to know you're still with me :) I should say that I wasn't suggesting that _this_ story wouldn't turn out to be Jori, or that we were going to leave them as friends while we wandered off to explore the romantic possibilities of Sinjin and Burf (Binjin? Surf?), it was more a question of whether you still wanted to read it at all. **

**I'm sorry I can't update quicker. I keep making a resolution to concentrate less on the writing and more on the story, and maybe cut some of the bickering to try and speed things up a little. My apologies for any typos, I'm writing this on a very tiny screen.**

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.

.

 _Tori's diary_

 _Jade stayed over last night, for the first time since we had our argument. I don't know why I blew up at her so bad, I mean, it brought back a lot of bad memories and everything, but I don't think I'd have made such a big deal out of it if it had been Andre, or Cat. I think it was because it was her - I've come to trust her so much that it felt like a betrayal, like a slap in the face. Not that she might think that about me, but that she'd find it something to mock – that if I had been gay, she'd think that was a bad thing, she'd think less of me. And that's crazy, because she couldn't have known about Sherwood, and she wasn't trying to hurt me, she thought I'd just laugh it off, and I should have. All I did was make it worse by yelling about it._

 _But she's here now, and I can't tell you how good that feels, knowing that we're back to normal. I can't believe she came all the way over here, and brought Beck too, to help me out. I guess I could have handled Ted on my own, he's not a bad guy, but calling her just seemed so natural. I've come to rely on her a lot, she's the first person I want to talk to when something happens, she's the first person I want to talk to when nothing happens, she's just the first person I want to talk to. The start of a friendship feels the way I always imagine a relationship ought to feel, everything's new and exciting, you can't wait to hang out, spend time together, share each other's life._

 _And why shouldn't it? Why shouldn't a friendship feel as intense as a love affair? Why should it be second-best? After all, people fall in and out of love all the time, but friendships can last forever. You can't say that one means less than the other, because you can't have one without the other. A good relationship is just friendship with the squicky bits thrown in._

 _Well, I guess I better go now, she's waking up, and I don't want her to see me writing this, I'd never hear the end of it. Promise me, Mr. Diary, that if she ever comes near you, you'll spontaneously combust, or something._

Tori slipped the book back into her desk drawer, as a long groan indicated that Jade was, indeed, waking up. A voice from somewhere in the middle of the covers said, "Do I smell coffee?"

Tori sniffed. "No, I don't think so."

"Well, why not?"

"Because I haven't... Ugh." Tori threw a spare cushion at the lump in the bed, and headed off downstairs to make coffee. She returned bearing two cups, placing one on the desk and one on the nightstand.

"Here."

Slowly a hand emerged from the bed, groped its way up the nightstand and crawled across the top until it came into contact with the cup. It prodded it a few times, and only then, once the physical existence of the coffee had been confirmed, did the rest of Jade follow, propping herself up against the headboard and bringing the cup to her lips. "Thanks," she muttered from somewhere inside it.

"You're welcome," Tori said. "You're not really a morning person, are you?"

There was no answer, except a slurp. "Anyway," she said, "thanks again for last night. You really didn't need to do that."

"My pleasure," Jade said. "And by 'pleasure' I mean, hideous ordeal that somehow I managed to endure."

"Or a people person."

"Mornings and people are my two least favorite things." Tori pouted, until Jade relented. "Present company excepted."

"That's better. So," she said, "what do you want to do today?"

"What, I have to spend the day with you as well?"

"You could always go home."

"I see. Just drag me over here in the middle of the night, then cast me aside like an old sock when you're done so you can go out and enjoy yourself."

"Did I ever tell what it feels like to have coffee poured over your head?"

Jade clutched her cup defensively. "Don't you touch my coffee."

"So _do_ you want to do something?"

Jade sighed. "I guess I could stand it for a couple of hours. What do you want to do?"

"We could go to the park?"

"Why?"

"Because it's nice."

"Is it?"

"Yes. It's a park. Parks are nice. That's what they're for."

"Well, okay, then. But it had better be, otherwise there'll be trouble."

.

.

.

They strolled through the park, watching the dog-walkers and the joggers, the weather warm but a little cloudy. "See?" Tori said. "Nice."

"Hmm."

A small dog raced across their path, in pursuit of a ball. As they looked, the ball hit a stone, bouncing unexpectedly sideways. The dog's head whipped around in response but the rest of its body couldn't react fast enough, sending it tumbling over and over into the long grass. Jade laughed.

"Jade."

"What? It's fine. Look." As she spoke the dog, having now got its legs back under control, was already bounding back towards its owner, ball clamped triumphantly in its jaws. "Dogs don't get hurt. They just bounce."

"Bounce?"

"You know, like babies."

"Babies don't bounce!"

"Sure they do. That's why they call them 'bouncing babies'."

"Remind me never to let you babysit my kids."

"Steady, tiger. You haven't even done it yet, and already you're talking about babies."

"Not babies with Ted," Tori said. "Not Ted babies. Just babies in a general sense. General babies. Kids."

"Thank God for that. Anyway, I'd be a great babysitter," Jade said. "I could tell some amazing bedtime stories."

Tori shuddered. "I'll bet."

"And later, when they're older, we can do all kinds of fun things, go out into the woods, climb some trees, set fire to a bunch of stuff, and then I'll teach them how to bake pound cake, so we can feed the ducks."

"You can't feed pound cake to ducks, Jade. They'll sink."

"Serves them right, the greedy little f-"

"Jade!"

"Flappers."

"Anyway, what do you know about making pound cake?"

"It's easy. It's a pound of flour, a pound of butter, a pound of eggs, a pound of sugar, a pound of ketchup, a pound of chocolate, a pound of-"

"That is _not_ how you make pound cake. There's no wonder my pizza base sucked."

"Don't shoot the messenger. And I'm cheap. Twenty bucks per hour per kid. No charge if I lose one of them."

"You're all heart."

"Reduced rate if it's just a limb or an eye."

"You know, maybe you should save 'Momma Jade's Funtime Extravaganza' for when you have your own kids."

"Who says I want kids? I just want to borrow yours, that way I get to hand them back when they're all sticky and gross."

"So basically you want me to have kids just so you can torment me?"

"Well that, and I think you'd make a pretty good mom."

Tori faltered, the way she always did when Jade casually dropped in a compliment in the middle of a tirade. "Er, thanks."

"No problem."

The tinkle of a bell heralded the arrival of an old lady on a bike, moving almost impossibly slowly, remaining upright only through sheer determination. They stopped to let her pass, a favor that earned them a look of deep condescension.

"Don't mind us, lady," Jade muttered.

"Jade."

"What?"

"Don't be snappy. It's not her fault. She must be nearly ninety."

"Then she needs to get a move on, time's running out if she wants to reach the ice-cream stand before she hits the big one. She probably set off in her early twenties."

Tori laughed, and absent-mindedly slipped her arm through Jade's. They both froze at the unexpected familiarity, and Tori went to whip it away just as Jade clamped her arm down to hold it in place. Tori was about to say something, but Jade just shrugged and moved on, dragging the other girl with her, skipping to keep up, until she matched Jade's stride and they walked on in pleasant silence.

Five minutes later Jade came to an abrupt halt, as a small drop of water landed on her nose. "It's raining, Tori," she said, accusingly. "You never said anything about rain."

Tori rolled her eyes. "I can't control the _weather_ , Jade," she said. "It's only a shower. Look, we can stand under those trees until it stops."

Jade allowed herself to be shepherded towards a small clump of trees, where a few other park-goers had taken shelter. Jade stood, arms folded, glaring at the rain, until she heard a sound beside her. She turned to see Tori, who was only wearing a thin T-shirt, rubbing her arms and shivering. She slipped off her jacket. "Here," she said. "Put this on."

Tori hesitated. "I can't take your jacket."

"Why?"

"Because then you'll be cold."

"I don't get cold."

It was an automatic reaction, and she realized that of all people, Tori was the least likely to be impressed by it. "I mean, I've got long sleeves." She held out her arms in evidence, but Tori still seemed reluctant. "Come on Tori, it won't bite. Even when it was alive, the worst it could do was moo at you."

Tori relented. "Thanks." She took the jacket and slipped into it, with a grateful smile, and Jade tried not to notice that that it suited her. Instead she turned back out towards the rain, and wrapped her arms around herself.

In the pocket of the jacket, her phone buzzed. Tori automatically reached for it and pulled it out. Jade thought about objecting but it seemed too late seeing as how Tori was already looking at it. "Who is it?" she said, instead.

"It's Beck," Tori said. "He got Ted home okay last night, apparently, but he says you owe him a-"

"Give me that!" Jade snatched the phone from Tori's fingers and stood, arms folded tightly with it clutched against her, blushing furiously. Tori frowned.

"What does he want?"

"Nothing."

"Come on. You were doing me a favor last night, the last thing I want is for you to end up owing something."

"It really doesn't matter."

"Is it gas money?"

"No."

"Homework?"

"No."

"Food?"

"No."

"It must be something. Is it something I could pay for?"

"God, no."

"Is it something I can help with?"

"No!"

"Is it something I can do _instead_ of you?"

"Jesus."

"I don't see why you're being... so..." Tori's eyes grew wide with realization, and she clamped her hand over her mouth as Jade's light pink blush became a deep red. "Oh, my God," she said. "Is it a sex thing?"

Jade didn't answer.

"It is, isn't?" Tori bit her lip. "I'm so sorry, I didn't mean to-"

"Shut up, now, Tori."

"I mean, obvious I'm not offering to-"

"Now, Tori. Now's a good time to shut up."

"Sorry."

The silence grew longer.

"So, what exactly-"

 _"No!"_

Tori shrunk back under Jade's thermal glare. "Okay, okay," she said.

Jade kept watching her until she was sure the danger had passed, the risked a glance at the phone. "Anyway, he's not getting it," she muttered. "Whatever it is," she added, as Tori seemed about to start over with the questioning.

God, who usually liked to prolong an awkward moment as long as possible, took pity on them, and it stopped raining. "Come on," Jade said. "Let's go."

"Here's your jacket."

"Keep it."

"Keep it?"

"What? no. I just mean keep it on until we get somewhere warmer."

"Oh. Okay. How about we go for coffee until we dry out a little?" Tori suggested. "My treat."

Free coffee was always an incentive.

"I guess so."

.

.

.

They sat at a table facing each other. The warmth of the diner had dried them out, and Jade's jacket, and more importantly her treacherous phone, were back in her possession.

"Are you sure you're paying?" Jade asked, as the waitress brought their coffee.

"Of course I'm sure," Tori said, brightly. "It's the least I can do after I offered to blow your boyfriend."

There was a loud crash as the waitress dropped her tray. "You know, sometimes, Tori," Jade said, "it's okay to _not_ say the first thing that comes into your head _."_

"Sorry, sorry. Sorry," she repeated to the waitress, who was backing away, staring at her. There was another buzz, but this time it was Tori's phone.

She looked down. "It's Ted."

"Well about time," Jade said. "What does he have to say for himself?"

"He says..." Tori scrolled down. "' _Sorry_ _sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry_ -'"

"Yeah, I get the picture. Is that all?"

Tori reached the bottom of the message, and giggled.

"What is it?"

"He says he hopes he didn't make you too jealous."

Jade looked up, sharply. "What?"

"Well, apparently," Tori said, grinning, "he thinks he may have told Beck he loved him."

Jade relaxed. "Yeah, well," she said, sourly, "a lot of people love Beck. He's a very loveable guy."

"Oh, come on, Jade. Don't be such a grouch. He's a nice guy. That's why _you_ love him."

There was a long pause.

"You do love him, don't you?"

Jade sniffed. "He's okay, I guess."

"Okay?" Tori said. "You used to threaten to murder anyone who even looked at him. Including me."

"Hey, whether I love him on, doesn't mean I want other people on my turf."

"Your 'turf'?"

"You know what I mean. I don't like people touching my stuff."

"He's your _boyfriend_."

"So?"

"So you must love him."

"Really? Do you love Ted?"

"Well, no, but it's early days yet, and-"

"So how long? How long before you have to love him? How long before the L.A.P.D. bust down your door and drag you away for Non-Reciprocation of Affection in a Built-Up Area?"

"Now you're just being stupid."

"Then don't tell me I have to love anyone."

"I'm just interested, that's all."

"So first you want to dig into my sex life, now you want to dissect my relationship."

"I wasn't-"

"Why do you care who I love?"

The question came out of nowhere, and for a moment it hung in the air, unanswered.

"Because I care about you," Tori said, eventually. "And I want you to be happy."

Jade wasn't entirely sure how to respond to that. "Oh," she said. "Um." It dawned on her that this wasn't quite enough. She picked up her coffee cup and mumbled something into it.

"Sorry?"

"I said, I care about you too," she said a little louder, her voice echoing around the inside of the cup, and was relieved to see Tori smile. She looked up for distraction to cover her embarrassment, and a movement behind Tori caught her eye.

"What?" Tori said, as Jade stared over her shoulder. "What is it?"

"There is a tide in the affairs of men, Tori, that taken at its flood leads on to fortune."

"You've lost me."

"That guy who just walked out left his phone behind."

She got up and walked over to the recently vacated table. "And it's unlocked."

"Jade!" Tori looked horrified. "You're not going to steal it?"

"No, of course not," Jade said. "I'm just going to have a little fun."

"What are you doing?" Tori went over.

"I'm sending a text."

Tori looked over her shoulder, to see that Jade had typed:

 **I can't hide it any longer. I think I love you. Let me know where we go from here xxx**

"Who are you sending that to?"

"Everyone in his contacts list."

"Jade!"

Jae hit send and put the phone down, just as its owner returned. He glanced around, and his face lit up when he realized it was still on the table. He moved to retrieve it, and his relief turned to puzzlement as it began to buzz with dozens of incoming messages. He stared at it, baffled. "What the... Oh, my God." He looked around, face ashen, and saw Jade and Tori. "Hey, you two," he said, "did you see anyone-"

"Sorry," Jade said, sniggering. "Gotta go." She hustled a giggling Tori to the door just as the next flood of texts came in, and they tumbled out, laughing, into the sunshine.

.

.

.

"That was mean."

"You have _met_ me, right? Anyway, we probably did him a favor. Poor guy looked lonely. It's not everyone who can hook up with hot chicks like us."

"'Us'?"

"Okay, me."

"No, I'm good with 'us'."

.

.

.

"Do you want to stay over tonight?"

"I can't. I've got to finish an assignment."

"At least come for dinner."

"No."

"Why not?"

"Because botulism's not really my thing."

"Very funny. I'll have you know I'm quite a good cook. Anyway, I'm not cooking. My mom is."

Jade showed the first glimmer of interest. "Your mom?"

"Uh huh," Tori said, smugly. "And guess what she's making."

"What?"

"Well, you'll never know unless you come."

"Why should I even care?"

"Because it's only _family pot pie_ , that's why," Tori said, smugly.

"Family pot pie?"

"Family pot pie."

"Your mom's making family pot pie?"

"Yes, she is," Tori said. "So if you want to be the first person ever - _ever_ \- to be invited to try it, you'll have to come over."

"Um… can I get it to take out?"

"No. You have to sit down and eat it with us, otherwise it's not 'family pot pie', is it? It's just 'pot pie'."

"I can cope with 'pot pie'."

"No. No family, no pie."

"Jeez. Okay."

.

.

.

"Well, this is nice, isn't it?" Holly Vega said, for the third time.

The five of them were sitting around the table, Jade shoveling pot pie into her mouth to avoid having to say anything, Tori watching her warily in case she _did_ say something, Trina wearing a scowl that said, _something's going on here but I don't know what_ , and David Vega wearing an expression of Buddha-like acceptance as he counted the hours down until he could safely make his excuses and leave.

"Mmm," Jade offered, when no one else was moved to comment.

"And I have to say," Holly went on, "I'm so pleased that you two have made up."

"Made up?"

"After all your little… tiffs."

Jade looked up. "Tiffs?"

"Yes," Holly said. "Tori's always telling us about how you two argue. It's nice to see you getting along."

"Oh, right." Jade glanced at Tori, who looked mortified. "Well, I wouldn't say we argue, so much, as-"

"Don't worry, Jade," Holly said, with a smile. "We've got two daughters. We're no strangers to teenagers and their little disagreements. Are we, David?"

"Hmmm?" David Vega looked up. Like most middle-aged men, he'd long since acquired a natural capacity to tune out any conversation that didn't involve the words _'beer'_ or _'sport'._ "What?"

"I said," Holly repeated, "we know all about teenage girls' tiffs."

He froze, torn between what he _thought_ he'd heard, and wondering whether he'd deleted his browser history. "Uh huh," he said, noncommittally.

"Well there you go," Holly said, satisfied. "These things soon blow over. Look at Tori and Trina. You wouldn't believe that they used to fight all the time."

Jade glanced at Tori and Trina, who were looking daggers at each other. "Yeah. Who'd have thought it."

"And it's so nice for Tori to have a little friend."

"Mom!"

"What?"

"I'm not five. Anyway, I've got lots of friends. Beck, and Andre, and…"

"I know, honey. But it's nice to have a girlfriend."

There was an awkward silence, and Jade was sure she heard Trina stifle a laugh. She wondered whether Tori's older sister was privy to the secrets of Sherwood. Tori, wisely, said nothing.

"So," Holly said, "what did you girls get up to last night?"

Jade snorted, and for the second time in their friendship Tori's foot collided with her leg, only this time it was hard enough to make her wince.

Nothing," Tori said. "Jade stayed over, and we watched a movie."

"That's nice," Holly said. "Which one?"

"What?"

"Which movie?"

"Er... "

"' _Cannibal Holocaust'_ ," Jade said. "I didn't want to, but Tori insisted. She's kind of weird like that."

"I did not..." Tori started, as Holly raised a disapproving eyebrow. "We did not watch _'_ _Cannibal Holocaust_ '," she said, crossly.

"My mistake," Jade said, cheerfully. "It was _'I Spit On Your Grave'_.'"

"It was not-"

"David!"

"What?"

"Are you happy they're watching this kind of thing?"

"She was _joking."_

"Oh, come on Honey. They're nearly... Wait, how old are you?"

" I'm seventeen, dad."

"You see? They're nearly... Wait, seventeen? Really?"

"Yes, dad."

"Wow, where does the time go? You know, it only seems like yesterday I was changing your diapers. Now, _that_ was a horror show."

"Dad!"

"Hey, you never forget your first one."

"Mom!" Tori appealed to Holly.

"No diaper talk at the dinner table, David."

"Anyway, what about Trina? She was first. Why don't you talk about _her_ diapers?"

"Trina didn't wear diapers. We just used to kick her out into the yard when she started scratching at the door."

"Hey!"

"Sorry, sweetheart, I forgot you were there."

Jade looked around, and gave silent thanks that her parents were cold and stand-offish, and she never had to be subjected to this kind of fiasco. "So," she said. "What do you guys think of Ted?"

There was a long pause, punctuated only by the scraping sound of Tori's foot trying to find Jade's leg again. "Who?" Holly said.

"Er…" Jade said. She stole a glance at Tori, who was desperately trying to shake her head without drawing attention to herself. "He's… the new dance teacher at school. Everyone's talking about him, he's one of those guys you either love or hate. I thought Tori might have mentioned it."

"No, Holly said. "She didn't say. So which is it?"

"What?"

"Do you guys like him or hate him?"

"Like him."

"Hate him."

They spoke simultaneously, and found themselves staring at each other. "Well, maybe hate's a little strong," Jade conceded. "He's…"

"… I don't really like him _that_ much, it's more…."

"… okay, I guess, and…"

"… just giving him a chance, but…"

"… we don't really know him yet," they finished together.

"Right," David said, inspired to join the conversation. "So is he better than that Psycho-pants guy?"

"Sikowitz?" Tori said.

"Yeah, that's him," her dad said. "He's one crazy mamajama. Reminds me of that guy from 'Lost'."

"No, he's not better. No one's better than Sikowitz."

"Right." Her dad said. He looked over at Trina, who Jade could see was practically fuming with suspicion. "So," he said, "what do you make of this Ted guy, Trina?"

They all turned to look at her. Tori's intake of breath was audible, but her sister's gaze slowly settled on Jade.

"I don't know," she said, icily. "I haven't met him. Yet."

"Well I expect you will, honey, I'm sure he likes a challenge," Holly said, brightly. "So, who's for dessert?"

.

.

.

Dinner over, Tori and Jade went up to Tori's room, Tori dragging her feet because she knew what was coming next.

"You haven't told them?" Jade said, as soon as the door was closed.

"I haven't had time."

"Time?" Jade said. "How much time do you need? 'Hey, mom, I'm dating a guy called Ted.' Four seconds. Five if you want to go into detail."

"Detail?"

"''He's just your average guy'."

"Very funny," Tori snapped. "What I mean is, I haven't really found the _right_ time."

"Jesus, Tori, it's not like you're telling them you're pregnant. You've got a boyfriend, woo hoo. They're going to be pleased, you dunce."

"You think?"

"Of course they are. It proves you're normal."

"Don't start that again."

"I don't mean straight, I mean normal. As in, you're not some unlovable, walking personality disorder that no one's ever going to want, and who's going to spend the rest of her life sitting on their sofa eating ice-cream until she's the size of a whale. You know. Like Trina."

"Don't be mean. Trina gets lot of guys."

"Yeah, 'cause she meets them all tits first. As soon the rest of her sorry ass catches up, it's bye, bye, Brad."

"Remind me again why I want to be friends with you?"

"Because you're a sucker for punishment?"

"I must be."

"Come on. You love me really."

Tori snorted. "Yeah, right."

Jade's face fell. "Oh," she said quietly. "I see."

"See what?"

She turned away. "Maybe I'd better go."

The sudden swerve in mood unnerved Tori. "Jade?"

"No, it's fine." There was a slight tremor in the other girl's voice. "I understand."

"Understand what?"

"I just thought that…"

"What?" Tori started to panic. "What's wrong?"

"I just thought that…" Jade turned back to face her, lip trembling, eyes wide and rimmed with tears. "That we were friends."

"We _are_ friends!" Tori flew off the bed. "Oh, God, Jade, I didn't mean it, I was only trying to… I was only.. I…"

Her outburst faded, as she spotted the sly grin forming on Jade's face. "You little ratbag!" she said, furiously. "That was _so_ mean."

"Yeah," Jade admitted. "But you really went for it. I was quite touched."

"I'll 'touch' you in a minute."

"Oooh, promises," Jade laughed. "Anyway, you must love me a little bit, otherwise you wouldn't be sleeping with me instead of your boyfriend." There was a long pause. "Okay, that came out wrong."

"Just a little."

There was a knock at the door. "It's Trina," Tori said.

"How do you know?"

"That's her knock."

"Well tell her to go whistle."

Tori looked at her. "You've never had a sister, have you?" she said. "She can keep that up all day. I'll be back in a minute."

She stepped out onto the landing to face Trina who was stood with arms folder, one eyebrow arched in enquiry. "Well?" she began.

"Well what?"

Trina sighed. She bunched up her knuckles and rapped them on Tori's forehead. "Ow!"

"Hello?" Trina said, sharply. "Anyone in there? I'm not an idiot, you know. We don't have a teacher called 'Ted'."

"Don't we?"

"No. So?"

"So what?"

"So who is he?" Trina said. "And why would Jade think mom ought to know about him?"

"Um…"

"I'm waiting."

"Well, he's the new barista at-"

"Are you dating, Tori?"

"Dating?"

"Yes, Tori. As in seeing someone."

"It's not really-"

"Dating, Tori. Yes or no?"

"It's kind of-"

She was cut off as Trina reached out and caught her by her lapels, drawing her close, until their foreheads were almost touching. "I'm your sister, Tori, she said, sweetly, "and lying to me is a punishable offence. So let's try again. Are. You. Dating. A guy. Called. Ted. Hmm?"

Tori resisted for a moment, then crumbled. "Yes," she muttered.

"You see?" Trina said, releasing her and smoothing out the crumples in her shirt. "That wasn't so difficult was it?"

Tori hesitated. "Are you going to tell mom?" she said, guardedly.

"Hell, no. What's it got to do with mom? I'm just pleased for you, that's all. It's about time you got serious. I was starting to think…"

"Think what?" Tori's eyes widened at the penny dropped. "Not you as well!" she moaned. "What is it with everyone?"

Trina held up her hands. "Hey, you can't blame me, Tori. You've been spending a lot of 'quality time' with the creature from the black lagoon in there, and I beginning to think maybe you two were-"

"Well we weren't!" Tori hissed, glancing at the door and hoping Jade wasn't listening.

"Well I know that _now_ , don't I?" Trina said. "Honestly, Tori, if you weren't so damned secretive I wouldn't have to be so nosy."

"I'm not being secretive!"

"So I'll just go down and tell mom, then, shall I?"

"What? No! Nononono."

"Right. So spill. Is it serious?"

"I don't know," Tori said, resigned to her fate. "Maybe? It's been a couple of months."

"A couple of months?" Trina sounded surprised. "And have you…?"

"What?"

"You know."

"Trina!" Tori pulled a face. "Not yet. We're kind of thinking about it."

"Thinking?" Trina echoed. "Guys don't 'think'. Guys just 'do'. You're the one who need to do all the thinking, sis." She rummaged hastily in her bag. "Here," she said, pushing something into Tori's hand. "Just in case. You owe me one."

Tori blinked and looked down at the shiny foil packet in her hand. It took her a few seconds to realize what it was, and then she recoiled, sending it bouncing to the floor. It lay there between them, innocently, as Holly Vega reached the top of the stairs. "Is everything… all.." She spotted the object on the floor, and the three of them stared mutely at it for a moment. Both girls opened their mouths to deny all knowledge of it just as Jade stepped out of the bedroom.

She took one look at the horrified desperation on Tori's face, and followed their gaze down to the floor. _"_ Sorry," she said, quickly. "Must have fallen out of my bag." She stooped to snatch it up, avoiding Holly's eye, and pushed past them across the landing. "Gotta go, Tori," she muttered. "Catch you later." She took the stairs two at a time, and headed out into the night before anyone could say a word.

.

.

.

Outside in the car, she stared at the tiny foil packet in her hand, and cursed Trina to hell and back for forcing this on Tori, encouraging her. Then she was struck by the far worse thought that maybe Tori had _asked_ her for this, that maybe Tori had been the one to bring it up, and cursed Trina all over again as an enabler. But either way this was an escalation, her nightmare made flesh, or at least her nightmare made squishy, slippery latex. This was proof that the notional, if unpleasant, idea that one day Tori might share a bed with someone would soon become a horrible, sweaty reality, that very soon Tori would be slipping this out of the bedside drawer, fingers trembling with anticipation, and…

She found herself short of breath, and suddenly nauseous. She flung the packet out of the car and hit the gas, top down, needing the wind in her face. That wasn't going to happen. Not now. Not ever.

 _Not on my watch._

 _._

 _._

 _._

 **Next up…. SABOTAGE!**

 **.**

 **.**

 **.**

 **Or maybe not. Anyway, let me know what you think, we're eventually getting to the stage where someone's going to have to make a move, but I don't want to rush things too much because half the fun is in the build up. So who's it going to be? I'll give you a clue - one of them says something, and then one of them _does_ something.**

 **Note: 'Cannibal Holocaust' and 'I Spit On Your Grave' do not make for a successful sleepover. Don't try this at home, kids.**


	7. Chapter 7 - Running Interference

**I thought I was doing quite well keeping up with this, then it turns out it's actually taken me weeks to write it. Sorry. Anyway, regular readers will know by now that Jade invariably tries to solve problems in the stupidest way possible, so let's see how she gets on this time.**

 **I don't know why I think Tori likes 'The Lion King'. It's just stuck in my head, like the banana thing.**

.

.

.

It wasn't that Tori didn't _like_ Ted - she liked him very much. He was clever, and funny, and good-looking, and once they'd got over the night of their slight... misunderstanding, he'd been considerate and gentlemanly. He was quite a catch, and she couldn't for the life of her explain why she hadn't introduced him to her parents. It was just... she wished she _felt_ something. She kept waiting for the fire to start, to feel the sparks when he kissed her, the butterflies in her stomach when he touched her, to be 'overcome with lust' at the very thought of him, as Jade had put it. But it just didn't happen. Maybe it takes time, she told herself, maybe passion is something that has to develop, that takes a while to build up pressure before it ignites.

But that's not what TV told her. Or the movies. Or books, or music, for that matter. In fact pretty much no one supported that theory. Maybe it was her. Maybe that was why Danny hadn't stuck around. Even kissing Beck hadn't done much for her - it had been a thrill to watch Jade react, but the kiss had left her nowhere. It just didn't grab her that way. Heck, she'd been more excited at the thought of Jade staying over than she ever had about seeing Ted.

Well maybe the whole of western civilization was wrong, she decided. Maybe they were all saying it ought to be like that just to spite her, to fool her into thinking that being in love was all about fireworks and fluttering hearts, when actually it was a more humdrum affair. After all, the only person she knew with any actual experience of it was Jade, and she seemed pretty unimpressed with the whole thing - she'd passed off sex as being much ado about nothing, and Tori couldn't imagine there being anything wrong with Beck.

Oh, well. There was no point dwelling on it. The movies tonight. Ted was picking her up in half an hour. She resolved to make it to the back row, and maybe let him get a little frisky, just to show willing.

.

.

.

Not quite the back row, but far enough back to allow them some privacy, she loosened her grip on Ted's hand, knowing that as soon as she did it would slip away from its chaperone and make its way towards her leg. She tried not to shiver. _Concentrate_ , Tori. _You're supposed to like this_.

"Hey."

They both turned in surprise to see Jade's beaming face appear between them, as she leaned over from the row behind. Tori was the first to recover.

"Jade?"

"That's me."

"What are you doing here?"

"I just thought I'd come and catch a movie."

Tori glanced around. "On your own?"

For the first time Jade's smile drooped a little. "Yeah," she said, defensively. "What's wrong with that?"

"Er... nothing," Tori said. She looked at Ted, confused, who misread this as a sign he should say something.

"Hi, Jade," he started. "Look, about the other night, I'm really sorry if I-"

"Yeah, no talking now," Jade said, abruptly. "The movie's starting."

"But-"

"I _said_ no talking." She leaned back and crossed her legs as the music began, and sat, arms folded, apparently engrossed in the opening credits. Ted and Tori looked at each other and turned back towards the screen, their ardor, or at least Ted's, a little dampened by the knowledge that Jade was sitting three feet away from them.

Two hours later they emerged into the foyer to find Jade waiting for them. Tori, torn between feeling bad for Ted at having his evening interrupted, and feeling bad for Jade at apparently having to come to the cinema on her own, decided not to make a big deal out of it.

"Hi," she said, as they reached her. "So what did you think?"

"About what?"

"About the movie."

She shrugged. "It was okay. Not really my thing."

"So... why did you come to see it?"

"I was bored."

"Oh."

"So what did you think, Ted?" Jade turned to him.

"Well..."

"It's kind of a drag, isn't it? When girls bring you to see chick movies."

Ted seemed a little torn himself, now, between staying in Jade's good books by agreeing with her, and staying in Tori's by denying it. "Well I wouldn't say it was a 'chick' movie, as such, the director's got quite a-"

"I guess it could've been worse," Jade went on. "It could have been 'The Lion King'. They're showing that over at Central. Tori loves it. You're lucky you weren't trying to get your freak on to The Circle of Life, or whatever it is."

Tori's well of sympathy for Jade ran dry instantly. "I do _not_ love 'The Lion King'," she said, furiously. "And we were not 'getting our freak on', thank you very much. We were enjoying a good film by a well-renowned director. It was Ted's choice."

"Right."

"It was!"

"Okay." Jade nodded, chastened, by Tori's outburst. "I believe you."

"Right," Tori said. "Good."

Jade paused for a moment, and then started humming _'Hakuna Matata'_.

"Stop that!"

"Sorry," Jade said. "I've just got it in my head now."

"Well get it out."

"So," Ted said, itching to get away from all this. "I guess we'd better go."

"Great," Jade said. "Where are we going?"

" _'We'_ are not going anywhere," Tori said. " _You_ are going home, and we are going..." It dawned on her that she was leaving an open invitation to Ted to take her somewhere else. "Home," she said. "Also. As well. Or at least Ted's going to his home, after he's dropped my off at my home. Where my parents are totally in, and will be very much still awake and waiting for me." She crossed her arms defiantly.

"Oh," Jade said. She shrugged. "Okay. See ya." And she was gone before Tori could say another word.

.

.

.

"What was that all about?" Tori demanded, the following day.

"I don't know what you mean."

"You, turning up last night."

Jade shrugged. "I went to see a movie."

"So you just decided, for no reason, to go on your own to watch a movie you didn't like."

"I didn't say I didn't like it."

"You said it was a 'chick flick'."

"Maybe I just wanted to get in touch with my softer side."

"What softer side?"

Jade looked offended. "I do have a heart, you know," she said. "And anyway, you said it was a classic piece of cinema by a well-respected director."

"Well..."

"In fact, you said Ted chose it, which must be true, because otherwise that would mean you were just trying to cover up the fact you were deeply, deeply embarrassed about it."

"I..." Tori struggled in the face of Jade's logic, and gave up. "Anyway," she said, "you didn't have to tell him I like 'The Lion King'."

"You do like it."

"I've seen it, like, once!" Tori said. "Maybe twice. Three times, tops. When I was a kid. And even if I _did_ love it," she went on, in the face of Jade's skeptical look, "I don't want Ted to know that, do I?"

"Why?"

"Why do you think? Why don't you want anyone to know about your goldfish?"

Jade's eyes narrowed. "That was a low blow, Vega," she said. "I told you that in confidence. The first rule of 'Truth or Dare' is you do _not_ talk about Buggles."

"I'm not talking about Buggles, though, am I?" Tori said, exasperated. "That's the point. I'm certainly not turning up unexpected while you're out on a date and telling your boyfriend about it. I want Ted to think I'm mature, and cultured, and classy. Not some Disney-obsessed fruitcake."

Okay, okay," Jade said. "I'm sorry. Jeez. I thought maybe he'd find it cute."

"I don't want to be cute!"

"Not even a little bit?"

"Not at all. I want to be-"

"Mature, classy and cultured. I get it."

"Good."

"And a little cute."

"No!" Tori insisted. " _Not_ cute. No one wants cute. Cute is for puppies. People want..." She pulled a sultry look. "Sexy."

There was a long pause, as Jade stared at her.

"Well they do," she said, defensively. "That's what guys want, anyway."

"Right. And that's you doing 'sexy' is it?"

"Yes."

"Wow."

"What's wrong with it?"

"Nothing. It's great."

"Really?"

"No. The thing about you, Tori, is that you're sexy because you don't know you are, you've got that whole 'girl-next-door' vibe going on, all sweetness and fairy cakes but with killer cheekbones and a great ass. It's what they call, 'sexy unawares'. When you try too hard, it kind of ruins it and you look like a dork. No offence," she added, before Tori could open her mouth to protest.

But Tori wasn't protesting, or taking offense, because Tori was too busy thinking about something else. "I have a great _ass_?" she said.

Jade rolled her eyes. "You see? You don't even know, do you? Most girls would give their right arm to have a butt like that."

Tori twisted round to try and see the object of Jade's admiration. "What, like really great, or just-"

"Don't milk it."

"Do people do that? I know Trina puts all kinds of crap on her face, but-"

"I meant, don't milk the compliment."

"Oh. Okay."

"Look," Jade said, sensing her opportunity, "I'm sorry about the movie, I honestly didn't know you were there."

Tori was still a little preoccupied with her ass. "Er, okay. It's fine," she said, distractedly. The bell rang. "I better get to class."

"Okay. See you later."

"Yeah," Tori said. "And thanks for the... ass thing."

"No problem," Jade said. She watched as she watched Tori wandered away, trying to sneak casual looks over her shoulder at her own backside without walking into anything. "No problem at all."

She turned to leave. "Although Ted's sure as hell not going to get his hands on it," she muttered under her breath.

.

.

.

 _Two days later…_

 _._

"Ted was supposed to come over, but it turned out he had a flat."

"That's a shame. Still, you know what they say."

"What?"

"That you shouldn't drive anywhere with a flat. It damages the rims."

"Oh. Right. Anyway, the weird thing is that his spare was flat too."

"Wow. That is a coincidence."

"Yeah. Especially since it was locked in the trunk."

"Spooky."

"Almost as though someone had done it deliberately."

"Who'd do that?"

"I dunno. Maybe he has a stalker. Hey, I wonder if his dad has cameras on the garage? Maybe they-"

"He doesn't."

.

.

.

 _Four days later…_

 _._

"Why the long face?"

"Ted said he bought me some flowers."

"That's good, isn't it?"

"Except I never got them. He said he left them on my doorstep, with a note, but when I got home they weren't there."

"Shame."

Pause.

" _You've_ got some nice flowers."

"Hmm? Oh yeah."

"Are they from Beck?"

"No, I just... found them."

"Found them?"

"Yeah. Just laying around. Some people are so careless."

"Right."

.

.

.

And so it went on. But it couldn't last forever. Jade couldn't spend half her life driving past Tori's house just in case she was up to something, people were beginning to notice. At one point David Vega had given her a cheery wave as she passed, she'd has to sink down so low in the seat that she couldn't see over the dash and nearly taken out a mailbox. Plus Beck was beginning to question her 'busy' status, pressing her for a night off from the endless extra evening classes she was lying about. Fate finally caught up with her.

It was the wink that did it. She was over at Tori's after school, and something about the other girl's mood had already made her feel uneasy – she seemed distracted, and unable to look Jade in the eye, mumbling something about homework, and Jade was just about to leave when she saw Trina wink – it was subtle, barely noticeable, which was remarkable for Trina, but still Jade caught it. Tori didn't respond, but something had passed between them, and Jade was determined to find out what it was. Her eyes fell on Tori's bag, opened on the sofa.

She waited until Tori disappeared upstairs to do whatever it was that to her hair that always took her so long, and slipped her hand inside, rummaging around. There was all the usual stuff, body spray, hairbrush, books, lipstick, but not what she was looking for. Maybe a false alarm. But then after the other night Tori wouldn't dare leave it anywhere it could fall out, or be found by her mom.

She began to run her fingers around the side, feeling the lining, looking for a seam, a pocket, anything. She found a small zipper tucked under a flap.

And there it was. A telltale bulge. She unzipped it and drew out the little shiny packet. _Got you..._

"What are you doing?"

She jumped and looked up to find Tori watching her from the foot of the stairs. "Um..."

"Why are you looking in my bag?"

"I just though... maybe I could borrow… something."

"What?"

"Er…"

"What's that in your hand?"

Jade's hand clenched involuntarily. "It's nothing."

"Jade…"

"Look, it's not what you think."

"Are you _stealing_ from me?"

"What? No!"

"Then what is it?"

"It's…" She was contemplating just turning and running away, but Tori had maneuvered herself between her and the door. She opened her hand, sheepishly.

Tori stared at the object in her hand, and then at her.

"You were going to take that?"

"No! Well, yes, but only because..."

"Because what?"

Jade gave up the pretense. "Because I don't think you're _ready_ for this," she said. "And Trina shouldn't be pushing you. It's not time."

"Who says it's not time?" Tori demanded. "Who gets to say when it's time or not? You?"

"I'm just looking out for you!" Jade protested. "That's what-"

"Don't!" Tori said. "Don't start with the 'friends' thing again! I'm not stupid, Jade, I know you think I'm a sucker for 'let's be friends', but this isn't what friends _do_."

"Hey," Jade said, "you started it. You wanted my advice."

"Yes!" Tori said. " _Advice_. But it's not up to you to decide for me. It's not up to you to say when it's 'time' or not. I'm not a child, Jade, no matter what you think, and you don't get to go rooting through my stuff because just because you think I'm not capable of deciding for myself."

"I don't think that!"

"Is this why you turned up at the movie theater?" Tori fumed. "Just in case I got it on with Ted?"

"No!"

"Yeah, right. Just watching a movie, my ass. What else, Jade? What else have you done that I don't even _know_ about? Did you bust Ted's tire?"

"It wasn't-"

"I swear to God, Jade, this is way out of line. What gives you the right to do that? What gives you the right to decide what I do or don't do? Are you smarter than me? Or older than me? Wiser than me?"

"Come on, Tori-"

"Do you think I'm not capable of thinking for myself?"

"Now you're just being-"

"Or are you so bored with your own crappy little relationship you can't help interfering in mine?"

There was a deathly silence, and a sense that things had gone too far.

"I see," Jade said, icily. "It's like that, is it?"

"Jade..."

"No," Jade snapped. "You're right. You're absolutely fucking right. I should be hanging out with Beck and having some fun for a change, instead of getting dragged over here every weekend to save your ass, while you dither around trying make your mind up whether to screw your own _boyfriend_."

She flung the condom back on the sofa. "Here," she said. "Take it. I hope you have lots of fun with it. I'd say I hope you choke on it, but I _really_ don't need that picture in my head. So go. Go fuck his brains out. See if I care. But don't come running to me when you feel like a cheap little whore in the morning."

She turned and made for the door, leaving Tori standing aghast behind her, hoping she made it before the tears started.

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Tori sat in front of the mirror. She wasn't sure why she'd been so upset with Jade - the other girl had stolen her phone, her books, pretty much anything she took a fancy to at one time or another, and Tori had never really minded, which said something about their relationship, although she couldn't say what, exactly. But this was different, this was deception with a motive, and that motive was to undermine something that was difficult enough as it was – Jade had no right to dictate to her the terms of something so personal, that was too much. But even as the embers of anger died, another, more fraught emotion rose.

Ted was coming over. In an hour Ted was coming to pick her up.

She wasn't stupid. She wasn't easily led, or weak, no matter what Jade thought. It _was_ time.

 _You're not a child._

She reached for the brush on the dressing table, and hesitated, as she caught sight of herself in the mirror. Her shirt was drooping at one shoulder, revealing a dark, satin bra strap. She ran a finger over it, gently. She'd bought this underwear a couple of weeks ago, as a bulwark against the fear, to try to inject some excitement into the prospect, to make her look forward to it.

She'd hoped it would make her feel special.

But now she felt anything but special.

She felt eyes boring into her and turned to see Cathy on the nightstand, her immobile expression all the more judgmental for its innocence. "Don't," she said. She crossed the room and took the doll, shoving it harder than she'd intended into a drawer, and felt a surge of guilt. "Sorry," she mumbled.

She sat back at the table, and began to pull the brush roughly through her hair.

 _Grow up, Tori._ It's time. Time to take the step, time to join the club. Time to become a woman. Whatever that means. You're not a kid anymore, everyone's doing it, you don't want to be left out, do you?

 _Time to put away childish things._

She heard a strange, choking sound, and realized it came from her own throat. She swallowed and wiped angrily at the treacherous tear rolling down her cheek.

.

.

.

Jade lay on the bed, curled up on her side, trying to ignore the gnawing sensation in her stomach. She could feel the dampness of the pillow under head, and still the tears kept coming. _This is your fault_. She's going to do it now, and it's your fault. You made her do it. She's going over there tonight just to spite you, just to show you that she can. You treated her like a kid, and now she's fighting back. This time tomorrow it'll all be over, and every time you look at her you'll know that she gave it away to someone else just to hurt you.

This is your fault.

 _What now?_

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.

Seven thirty. Half an hour. Tori finished applying her mascara for the third time, the unsteadiness of her hand making it almost impossible. She leaned back. That would have to do. She ran a hand through her hair and was just about to tie it back when she heard the doorbell.

He was early. Damn it. How could he be early? That wasn't fair. She'd said eight o'clock. It dawned on her that Ted was probably pretty eager to get on with things and her stomach took another lurch. She glared at herself in the mirror. _Come on, Tori. Get a grip. This time tomorrow you'll be wondering what all the fuss was about._

She made her way downstairs, and paused, hand on the door. She brushed back her hair, and arranged her features into an expression of cheerful enthusiasm. Not too keen, not too casual. _God, she wished Jade was here_. She took a deep breath, and opened the door.

"Hi," she said. "I wasn't expecting... you..."

She tailed off. It wasn't Ted on her doorstep. Ted was nowhere to be seen. Instead there was a smaller figure, black hair tipped with green, eyes wide and red-rimmed, face streaked with tears. For a moment they stood there facing each other.

"Jade?"

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.

The voice, when it came, was a whisper.

"Please don't go."

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 **So is this it? Is Jade finally going to say something? Find out next week, or at least some time before Christmas. But this is not the end, I'm afraid. This is not even the beginning of the end. But it is, perhaps, the end of the beginning.**

 **All comments welcome, good or bad. If you want to picture Jade at the end of this chapter, imagine the moment she turns up to Tori's trying to blag her way onto the quiz team, only for real.**


	8. Chapter 8 - Night of the Living Ted

**Hi, back again, I'm afraid, turning up like a bad penny. So, the moment of truth - is Jade going to do the sensible thing, be totally open and honest, lay it on the line and bare her soul to Tori?**

 **What do _you_ think?**

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.

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"You can't go to Ted's. Not like this. Not tonight."

"Jade, I-"

"Please, Tori."

"But why? Why not tonight?"

Jade hesitated. She hadn't really thought this far. "Because he's… dead."

" _What_?"

"I'm sorry," Jade said, sympathetically. "I didn't want to be the one to tell you."

"Oh, my God."

"I'm so sorry, but that's the way it goes."

"But he can't be dead! I only spoke to him an hour ago!"

"Death keeps no timetable, Tori. The sands of time trickle endlessly through your fingers. When your number's up, it's up."

"But why? How? What happened? Was it an accident?"

"Er…"

"What about the police? Do his parents know? Oh God, I'd better call them."

"What? No! No, don't do that! They'll be… busy."

"Busy?"

"You know. Grieving."

"But I… they… we should…" After a moment, Tori's eyes narrowed. "Wait a minute," she said. "How do _you_ know?"

"I… um…"

Jade heard the gasp and closed her eyes, to block out the sight of what she knew would be Tori's 'righteous indignation' face, when eyes and mouth became perfect circles in horror at uncovering whatever scheme Jade had been trying to get away with.

"He's not dead at all, is he?"

"Not as such, no," Jade conceded. "Well, maybe a little on the inside, but-"

Tori was apoplectic. "You little... You are unbelievable!" she fumed. "Right, that's it! Get out of my house!"

Come on, Tori it was just-"

"Out!"

"No!"

"Yes!"

"Come on, Tori."

"No! Get out!"

"I'm not leaving."

"Yes you are!"

"No I'm not!"

"Yes you are!"

"No I'm not!" Jade put her foot down. "I am not leaving this house, Vega, and that's final."

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.

.

"I can wait out her all day if I have to!"

"Good!" Tori's voice was muffled by the door between them.

Jade sighed, and rested her head against the woodwork. This had not, on reflection, been such a great idea. "Come on, Tori."

"Go away!"

"I'm not leaving."

"Fine. You just wait right there until Ted turns up."

Suddenly there was a new terror, that she'd have to stand here like an idiot while Ted came ambling up the path, whistling a happy tune as he rehearsed the many and varied ways he was going to get lucky, have to stand aside, rejected, as he walked past her with a grin. She could always waylay him, a veiled threat, an accidental boot to the groin, but all that was putting off the inevitable and making it worse. She hammered on the door, redoubling her efforts.

"Tori, please!"

"I'm not talking to you!"

"Yes you are!"

"Only to tell you to go away!"

"That still counts!"

"No it doesn't!"

"Jesus." Jade took a breath. "Look, I know I did wrong, okay?" she shouted. "I know it was none of my business, that I shouldn't have stayed out of it, but please don't do this! Don't go just to punish me, or to prove a point. If you do something you'll regret just because you're mad at me, I'll never forgive myself. _You'll_ never forgive me. And I…" Her voice tailed off. "I don't want to lose you."

There was silence on the other side of the door. She turned and leaned her back against it, tilting her head to look at the sky. She wondered if Tori had gone, taken herself upstairs to get ready, resolved to ignore Jade altogether. Finally she slammed both hands flat against the woodwork, pushed herself upright and began to walk away.

There was the snick of a latch, and she turned to see Tori in the doorway. For a few seconds they looked at each other, then Tori gave a slight tilt of the head, as though to say 'come in'. Silently Jade pushed past her into the house.

Tori still said nothing, just glaring, as Jade stood wringing her hands, a mess of anxiety, but after a few seconds her hand slipped into her jeans pocket. She glanced down to check the number, and then dialed, lifting the phone to her ear without taking her eyes off Jade.

"Hey. Hi. It's me," she murmured when it picked up. "Look, I can't make it tonight. Something's come up. "Yeah, I know. I'll call you." She killed the call and slid the phone back into her pocket.

Jade practically crumpled with relief. She hadn't won. There was nothing to win. Nothing good would come of this, every path still led to disaster. But at least the danger had passed for tonight. "Thank you."

"You're welcome," Tori said, a touch coldly. "But let's get one thing straight. This is my life, okay? Not yours. It's not up to you what I do, and it's not up to you when I do it. If I want to sleep with Ted, I'll sleep with him. If I don't, I won't. But whichever it is, it's my decision. Got it?"

Jade nodded.

"And if you ever, ever pull a stunt like that again, we're done. I mean it."

Jade nodded again, looking as contrite as she possibly could.

"Good. So…" Tori puffed out her cheeks and looked around. "What do you want to do tonight?"

Jade blinked in surprise. "You want me to stay?"

"Well I am kind of at a loose end right now, what with having to cancel my _date_ , and everything…"

Jade was about to apologize all over again, but then she spotted the small smile on Tori's lips. She puffed out her cheeks and sighed. "So now you want me to ditch my plans just to hang out with you?"

"Only if you're not _too_ busy."

"Well, I dunno, I suppose I could spare you a few hours."

" _Yeah_ , you can," Tori said, smugly. She went over to Jade and took her by the hands. "Look, I was pretty mad, but that wasn't why I was going over to Ted's, I swear it wasn't. I wouldn't do that to you. I don't want to lose you either, you know?" she said, ducking her head to catch Jade's downcast eye. "You do believe me, don't you?"

Jade shifted awkwardly at the contact. "I guess."

"There you go." Tori let go of her hand. "But maybe this is for the best, you know?"

"The best?"

"It wouldn't have felt… right, going over there when I was still angry at you."

"Well, it would kind of kill the mood."

"Yeah," Tori said. "I guess I'd have a hard time concentrating if I was thinking about _you_ the whole time."

Jade snorted. "You don't know the half of it," she muttered under her breath.

"What?"

"Nothing. So, are you still mad?"

Tori shrugged. "Yeah, I am. But not that much. I know you're only trying to protect me, even if you _were_ doing it in the dumbest way possible. And I guess I should be thankful someone's looking out for me."

"What about Trina?"

"Trust me, you really don't want to know what Trina has to say about it. Some of it made my toes curl."

"I'm surprised anyone's stuck around long enough for her to get that much experience."

"I'm not sure she even _has_ any experience, if you ask me she gets most of it from the internet. I dread to think what her search history looks like."

Jade laughed. "Trina Vega, porn addict."

"Ugh. Don't. And I'm sorry."

"What for?"

"For what I said about you and Beck. I didn't mean that. I was just-"

"Angry, I know. I guess I deserved it," Jade said. "I didn't _really_ mean what I said about hoping you choked to death on a condom."

"Are you sure?"

"Sure, I'm sure. No one deserves to go out that way. Except maybe Trina."

"You know what you said about mental images?"

"Sorry."

"Now go grab a couple of sodas. I think there's some leftover pizza in there too."

"I'm on it."

.

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"There's someone trapped in your drawer."

"What?"

They were sitting on Tori's bed, the movie had finished, and Jade was casting around for something to say. "There's a leg sticking out of your drawer. Over there."

Tori looked, to see Cathy's leg stuck out from her temporary prison. "Oh, God." She jumped up to free her, as Jade laughed.

"You don't need to hide her from me, Vega. I've seen her hundreds of times."

"It wasn't from you," Tori said, fluffing the doll back into life.

"You've had someone else here?"

"No. I just didn't want her watching me while I was..." She trailed off.

"Jilling off?"

"What?"

"You know, like jacking off, only for-"

"No! Eww," Tori said, clutching the doll to her protectively to shield her from Jade's accusations. "I just didn't want her watching while I was... getting ready."

"Getting ready for what?"

"You know."

Tori writhed in embarrassment, her eyes darting everywhere except towards Jade, and Jade understood. She felt a slight lump in her throat at the thought of Tori feeling ashamed, trying to hide the fact she was growing up from her childhood friend.

"Oh."

"Anyway, it's all fine now," Tori said quickly, smoothing down the doll's hair, and propping it back up on the nightstand. "Everything's fine," she repeated.

Jade wondered if the reassurance was for the doll, or for Tori. The other girl still couldn't catch her eye, obviously mortified, and she decided to offer something in return..

"If it's any consolation," she said, "I had to hide Sergeant Stuffly the first time Beck came over."

Tori looked at her guardedly. "Right," she said. "Is that some kind of weird sex euphemism I should know about, or..?"

"What? No, he's a bear."

"What kind of bear?"

"A _stuffed_ bear, Tori, although I'm kind of touched that you think I'd keep a live bear in my room."

"You have a stuffed bear?"

"Yeah," Jade said, defensively. "Hence the name. Sergeant Stuffly. Because he's stuffed. And…" she felt herself redden slightly, "…he's a sergeant."

"A sergeant?"

"Yes."

"Police or army?"

"What?"

"Is he a police sergeant or an army sergeant?"

"Er… army."

"GI?"

"Special Forces."

"Wow. So does he know how to kill a man with his bare paws?"

"Are you mocking my bear?"

"No, not at all. I think it's really sweet. I'd never have guessed that about you."

"Yeah, well let's not talk about it right now."

"But-"

"Or ever again. Seriously."

"Okay."

"Good."

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.

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"So… did he train with your dad, or what?"

"Shut up."

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 _Tori's Diary_

 _._

 _Why can't I stay mad at her? That's the thing that always bugs me. Take tonight._

 _I've been antsy all day because I knew I was going over to Ted's house, his parents were away and so were mine, and it just felt... not right, exactly, but like fate. As if the world had said, time's up. But I couldn't tell her. I don't know why, but I just couldn't. It felt like I was... cheating on her, somehow. I mean, lying to her was just as bad, a betrayal, like I was going behind her back, which I was, I guess, but the alternative was telling her to her face, and that would have been even worse. So I let her drive me home, and I didn't say anything, and then I found her going through my bag looking for my you-know-what, and I just lost it, I don't know why. I think maybe I felt a little guilty that she'd found out and I hadn't told her, but she was still in the wrong. Anyway, we both said some pretty nasty things, and then she left._

 _And then she came back, and made it even worse by trying to tell me I couldn't go because Ted had died, for God's sake. I mean, seriously?_

 _Anyway it turns out that wasn't true, obviously, she just didn't want me to go because she felt like she'd pushed me into it by being such a gank, like I'd do it on purpose to teach her a lesson. So I didn't go, obviously, otherwise this would be a whole different entry. And if I'm honest I'm kind of relieved I'm not writing it. But the thing is, I can't stay angry with her. She can do all that, and in the end I forgive her._

 _I know what you're thinking, I'm a gullible sap. But it's not that. Sometimes she can fool me, sometime she can make me believe all kind of things – she almost had me with the 'Ted's dead' thing - but I always know when she's really, genuinely sorry . She gets this adorable pink tinge in her cheeks, like apologizing is literally the hardest, most embarrassing thing she can imagine. So when she does that, she means it._

 _Of course she also blushes when you find out she's got a stuffed bear at home. That's so cute. Maybe I should get her to bring him over, introduce him to Cathy._

 _Crap, I've got to stop writing things like that, it makes me sound like a five-year-old. You know, when I started this, I thought it would be nice to write it in a notebook, to keep and look back on, but it seriously needs an 'undo' button. Anyway, we made up, and I have to tell you I felt… euphoric, like a huge weight had been lifted off me. Not just because I didn't have to go to Ted's, but because we made up and she stayed over. It was like if you'd been dreading an exam for weeks, and then right at the last minute someone said, hey, you don't have to do that exam. Have a cake instead._

 _So I think we're all good. But I still don't know why she didn't want me to go in the first place, I mean, I get why she wouldn't want me to do it after an argument, but that doesn't explain all the other stuff, the tires, and going through my bag._

 _Anybody would think that she didn't want me to do it at all._

 _I wonder if maybe she's worried that once it's over I won't need her anymore. I hope that's not what she thinks, I couldn't bear that. When all this is over and I've got it out of the way I want us to carry on just the way we are. I can't imagine not having her here. I've gotten so used to waking up next to her sometimes it feels like we're married._

 _I'll tell her that in the morning, clear the air, make sure she doesn't think I'm going to abandon her._

 _._

 _Except the bit about being married. That sounds kind of weird._

 _._

 _._

 _._

 **So close, and yet so far. And yes, Tori, that does sound kind of weird.**


	9. Chapter 9 - Earthquake!

**Hi-de-hi, campers. Yet again, the first ninety percent of the chapter took the first ninety percent of the time, the last ten percent of the chapter took the _other_ ninety percent of the time. I've got to stop fiddling around with stuff and just post it.**

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 _Jade spent an uneasy night. The dreams, so lately banished by her proximity to Tori, had returned with a vengeance, but a new and disturbing twist. She found herself floating as always above the writhing figures on the bed, watching Tori's face contort in ecstasy, her hands gripping the sheets, her legs hooked around the body on top of her, but now something was different. The body on top was no longer Ted, the back was less muscular, the waist narrower, the hair long and dark, flecks of green intertwined._

 _And there on the arm was a five-pointed star…_

She woke up in a cold sweat. Beside her, Tori stirred but didn't wake. Jade looked down at her, hair strewn across her face and neck. Soft. Unthreatening. Vulnerable.

She slunk down to the kitchen to get a glass of water. She should just go. Last night had been the end, there'd be nothing now she could do, Tori would be on her guard for any more tricks, and she could hardly come over every weekend and plead with her not to go. Maybe she should have just stayed home and let it happen, stuck her head under the pillow, or raided her dad's liquor cabinet, turned her music up full and lost herself in oblivion. At least then it would be over, like ripping off a Band-Aid. As it was she'd made a total fool of herself, and she still had the nightmare to come, only this time Tori was probably going to make it a million times worse by announcing it ahead of time, for Christ's sake, and she'd just have to sit there like a cuckold, taking it, whispering reassurance, picturing it in her head.

She brought the glass to her lips and turned to see something laying on the kitchen table.

Tori's phone.

She knew how to unlock it, in the same way she knew how to get into Tori's locker, or how to get her medical records - she did her research. It sat there invitingly, almost glowing with temptation, pulsating with opportunity, drawing her towards it with its promise of illicit meddling. She might not be able to put a stop to Tori and Ted's relationship, but _Tori_ certainly could. One text, one message, one hint, and Ted would be dust.

But that would be wrong. That would be _so_ wrong. That would a betrayal of trust so epic, so fundamental, that Tori would never forgive her.

If Tori ever found out, that was. If, for instance, Jade didn't delete both the outgoing message _and_ Ted's reply, and then maybe drop the phone in the waste disposal. In _those_ circumstances, everything would be absolutely fine. But that was a purely academic consideration, because of course Jade wasn't going to do anything like that.

And even if she _was_ to do something so underhand, so deceitful, what would she write, anyway? What kind of message would be guaranteed to put Ted off completely? She didn't want to start a conversation or get into a discussion, she didn't want a response, she just wanted to give him a nudge in the right direction. He'd already be feeling pretty pissed about his date. So how about, s _orry I couldn't make it last night, I just remembered..._ what? I had an emergency appointment at the STD clinic? I was playing strip poker with the guys from the football team? I think you're a total prick? I'm gay?

 _I was looking out wedding dresses with my mom._

Boom, yeah, that was the one. Slam dunk. Nothing would terrify a teenage guy more than that.

But naturally Jade wasn't going to do that, because Tori was her friend, and, as she'd already concluded, it would be very, very wrong. So best just to leave the phone alone, and…

She looked down at the table to see that the phone had disappeared. Strange. She tapped her chin thoughtfully, only to discover that the thing she was tapping it with was Tori's phone. She recoiled in surprise to see that not only was it mysteriously unlocked but that she'd already typed half the message. _Damn it, Jade._

She was still looking at the treacherous device when Tori arrived in the kitchen, already talking.

"Hey, look, I just wanted to say that whatever happens with me and Ted, it won't affect us, okay?" she was saying. "I won't ditch you, or need you any less once we've… well, you know. I don't want you to think that I'm only using you as a crutch to get over the difficult part, I still want us to be friends afterwards, and… what are you doing?"

Busted. _Again_.

"Er…" Jade clutched the phone guiltily to her chest. "Well. It was the weirdest thing," she said, "but I was just getting some water, and... there was an earthquake."

"An earthquake?"

"Yeah, hey, I'm as surprised as you are. Anyway, it wasn't a big one, but it shook the table pretty bad, and your phone was about to hit the floor, and-"

"Give me that." Tori snatched the phone. She looked at it, and then held it up to Jade's face accusingly. "Why is my phone unlocked?" she demanded.

"Aftershocks?" Jade said, hopefully.

"There was no earthquake!" Tori said, furiously. "You're still doing it, aren't you?"

"I was just-"

"Christ on a circus pony, Jade," Tori said, "what the hell is wrong with you? After everything we said last night! After I let you stay! And you're still trying to screw me over! Why, for God's sake?"

"I wasn't-"

"Why are you so dead set against it? Is it Ted?" she said. "Do you know something about him? Is there something wrong with him?"

"Well, no, but-"

"Is it me? Is there something wrong with me? Have I upset you in some way? Have I wronged you? Is this all part of some terrible revenge thing, have I've done something so bad that you feel the need to hurt me?"

"No!"

"Then why, Jade?"

"Please, Tori…"

"Why?"

"I-"

"Why don't you want me to sleep with him?"

"He's not-"

 _"_ _Why don't you want it to be him?"_

"Because I wanted it to be me!"

The words escaped before she had chance to stop them, and for a moment the two of them stood, frozen in the silence. Tori's jaw dropped.

" _What?_ "

"I know!" Jade whirled to face her, angrily. "I know how stupid that sounds!" she said. "I don't even know what it _means_. All I know is that I've watched you all this time, getting ready for this, worrying about it, planning it, getting excited, and all I could think was… I wanted it to be me. It should have been _me."_

"But…"

"Okay, fine," she snapped. "Even if it wasn't me, it should be someone who _cares_ about you, Tori, someone who'd respect you. Ted doesn't care about you, he couldn't give a rat's ass about you. You'll just be a step up the ladder, a shin up the greasy dick of manhood, he'll be laughing about it with his buddies before you've even got out of the shower, telling them all what you were like, what you'll do, how far you'll go. whether you were worth all the fucking flowers he had to buy just to get in your pants. And they'll all laugh, and slap each other on the back, and call him 'dude', and congratulate him on nailing you. And you deserve more than that, Tori." She felt herself welling up. "You're special. You should be treated like a fucking princess, not some… piece of _meat."_

Tor was still staring at her, her mouth opening and closing like bewildered goldfish, and suddenly Jade knew she had to leave. Everyone knew that running away from your problems solved everything. That was a cast-iron fact, backed up by years of experience.

"I've gotta go."

Tori was dumbstruck for a moment, but then, spurred by some deeper motive, sprang into action. "What? Whoa!" She vaulted over the sofa, reaching the door a split second before Jade, and spread-eagled herself across it. "You can't leave."

"Let me go, Tori."

"No."

"Let me go." It was almost a growl.

"No."

"Tori…"

" _No_ , Jade." Tori was adamant. "We have to talk about this."

"What?" Jade said in frustration. "What is there to talk about? I'm not gay, you're _definitely_ not gay, we've both got boyfriends, we've been on double _dates,_ for fuck's sake. What the hell is there to talk about? All I've done is try to screw up your relationship for the sake of some weird, sick little fantasy. Heck, I don't even like you, your ears are too big and you walk funny. Now let me _go."_

"I don't mean _this_ , this," Tori said. "I don't even know what 'this' is. But I am not going to let you go out of this door and ruin a friendship I've spent years trying to build."

"It's already ruined."

"No it isn't!" Tori insisted. "But it will be if you walk out of here. Because you'll be so wound up, so terrified that you've made a fool of yourself that you'll probably never speak to me again. You'll just spend the rest of school making my life hell to make up for it, and I couldn't stand that. Not after everything." Her voice softened a little. "Not after we've been bed-buddies. Please?"

Jade's right eye twitched, the way it did every time Tori used the dreaded 'b' words, but for a moment said nothing, just stood there stewing in her embarrassment. Eventually she looked away and nodded.

"Thank you." Tori breathed, and reached out, tentatively, to put her hands on Jade's shoulders. "So why don't we both just take a deep breath, calm down, and talk things though, hmm?"

Jade hesitated. "Okay."

"Over breakfast?"

"Fine."

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.

.

"So.. are you actually gonna _make_ some breakfast, or are we just going to stand here in the hallway like a couple of idiots and hope it turns up?"

"You see? You're feeling better already."

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They sat in the diner, each lost in their own thoughts. Jade was, in truth, desperately hungry, but she couldn't face the task of actually putting food in her mouth, so she contented herself with pretending the egg yolk was an eyeball, and seeing how much pressure it could stand before it popped.

"Maybe you're just jealous," Tori said, eventually.

Jade snorted. "You think?"

"I don't mean like that," Tori said, "I just mean… Look, we've been spending a lot of time together lately, it's all been pretty full-on. I'm not complaining, or anything, it's been great, but sometimes it's easy to get confused about how you feel. Especially if it's the first real friendship you've had."

There was a splat as the egg finally gave way.

"I don't mean that in a cruel way," Tori went on, perhaps sensing a little hostility in the egg's demise. "I just mean that I've seen you and Cat together, and you'll do anything for her, but you don't ever let your guard down, do you? You never let her _see_ you, it's all on your terms. I'm guessing this is the first time you've ever opened up and let someone be _your_ friend, and I'm really kind of honored by that. But sometimes, you can get carried away, go too far the other way. You get so close to someone, so wrapped up in them, that you want to be there all the time, share everything they do, be the center of their attention. And now with Ted on the scene and everything, maybe you just feel a little like he's intruding. Like he's… on your turf."

"On my turf?"

"You know. Touching your stuff."

Jade looked up and blinked, slowly. Tori's rationalization was complete nonsense, but it sounded a heck of a lot more plausible than the 'brain aneurism' excuse she'd been quietly working on.

"I guess," she said, guardedly.

"What I'm saying is, you're feeling threatened by me getting close to him, because you're worried about getting shut out, that I might end up forming a bond with him that I can't with you. That in some way if he's first, then he'll always _be_ first, and you'll be second best. And that's not true, Jade. Whatever happens with Ted, you'll always be my number one. If I had to make a choice between the two of you, I'd always choose you."

Jade didn't quite know what to say. "Er… thanks," she muttered. "And I'll always… you know. The other thing. What you said."

"I know," Tori said. "So… are we okay?"

"We're okay."

"Friends?"

"Friends."

Tori sighed with relief. "Thank God for that." She went back to her food, evidently pleased with her explanation, and Jade watched her in wonder. Tori was effectively giving her a 'get-out-of-jail-free' card, a way of salvaging at least some of her self-respect, even if it meant sucking it up and taking the hit when it came. And she wondered if the other girl knew she was doing it, if it was deliberate, or if she really believed it was that simple.

She was still thinking this when Tori cleared her throat. "That stuff you said earlier, about me being a princess, and deserving respect, and all that..."

Jade groaned. "I was really hoping we could kind of let that go."

"I'm just saying that was really sweet, that's all."

"Right. Good."

"And I just want you to know," Tori said, "that if you _did_ feel that way about me-"

"Jesus."

"No, hear me out. If you did, I wouldn't think you were… weird or anything, I wouldn't be freaked out by it. I'd be… I don't know. Flattered, I guess."

"Flattered? Why?"

"Well, why not?" Tori said. "You're the hottest girl in school, Jade, you could have pretty much anyone you wanted, and it would be kind of a compliment if you wanted me."

"I'm the hottest girl in school?"

"Sure you are. You're pretty, you're smart, your funny, you look amazing, you've got a great… what?"

"You seem awfully well informed about my attributes, Tori."

"I'm not blind, Jade. Anyway, _you_ said I had a great ass."

Jade pulled a face. "Uh, yeah, about that, I didn't-"

"I get it," Tori said. "I really do. It was just a compliment. And I think it's sad that people can't say nice things about each other without _other_ people – other nasty, spiteful people, that only even _got_ into the cheerleader squad because their dad's the team coach – saying mean stuff about me. I mean them," she said, quickly. "About them."

Tori pursed her lips and looked down, and Jade suspected that she wasn't entirely plucking this example out of thin air.

"You're absolutely right," she said, as Tori glanced up at her warily. "Totally right. We should be able to nice stuff about each other."

"There you go," Tori said, evidently relieved. "I've got a great ass, you've got great…" Tori held out her hands towards Jade's breasts, and for one horrible moment Jade thought she was actually going to cup them. She folder her arms quickly to protect her assets.

"Tits, Tori," she said. "They're called tits."

"Yeah. Tits."

"You know, a half hour ago, I thought my life couldn't get any more awkward."

"Oh, hush," Tori said, with a wave of the hand. "We're all right now, now aren't we?"

"Hmm."

"Yeah, you see? Totally cool." Tori beamed. "Everything is absolutely, totally cool."

.

.

.

"Wait, what do you mean, 'my ears are too big and I walk funny'?"

"Can I pleads the fifth?"

"No, but you can pay for breakfast."

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Tori walked back into the house to find Trina standing there, arms crossed, tapping her foot.

"So?"

"So what?"

"So how was it? Are you okay?"

"It's complicated. Something came up."

"That's what's supposed to happen, doofus."

"I don't mean… oh boy, you are so gross. No, I mean, Jade came over, and she was really upset, and so I had to cry off."

"Right."

"I did!"

"You know, I'm beginning to wonder about you two."

"What do you mean?"

"You know _exactly_ what I mean."

Tori gritted her teeth. Trina was The Girl Who Knew Too Much, but at the same time understood absolutely nothing. How to explain? How to describe the complex relationship that defined her and Jade? How to make her sister understand that the bonds that bound them were strong but brittle, that twisted the wrong way, examined too closely, they could shatter, and leave her lonelier than she'd ever been? How to tell her that romance and friendship are merely facets of the same emotion, brought into the light by the jeweler of fate? How to find the words, the _mot juste_ , to sum up the situation?

"Fuck off, Trina," she said, and stomped off to her room, leaving her sister open-mouthed but mercifully, if briefly, speechless.

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She kicked shut the bedroom door, walked over to the bed, and with a low groan collapsed onto it. After a moment's consideration, she reached out to the nightstand, picked up its occupant, and rolled over onto her side, curling up into a ball, smaller and smaller, tighter and tighter, Cathy clutched to her chest, eyes closed against the light, and tried not to remember.

 _Alison..._

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 **So there we go. All's well that ends well, everything's back to normal. The end.**

 **.**

 **.**

 **Only kidding, we've still got a little way to go yet. So, Jade has now definitely Said Something, and Tori, for whatever reason, has talked her out of it. So, what's going to happen now?**

 **And whither Ted?**

 **In other news, I'm thinking of resurrecting 'Only a Winter's Tale', if anyone's interested. VoltageStone will still be going with their version, so we'll be diverging in a 'Power Play' kind of way, only without all the nipple-clamps and weirdness.**

 **UPDATE: 'Only a Winter's Tale' lives again! So if you're feeling bored, feel free to read it, all comments welcome.**


	10. Chapter 10 - Fireworks

**Okay, forgive me, I know it's slow, but at least we're getting somewhere. I had something to tell you here, but for the life of me I can't remember what it was.**

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 _I don't even know where to start, Mr. Diary. I can't believe that just happened._

 _I wanted it to be me. That's what she said. I wanted it to be me._

 _Yes, I know. We've been here before. Well, me and my old diary, anyway. But even I never came out and just said it like that. God, I can't imagine what they would have made of that at Sherwood. And I know she kind of took it back, but just for a minute, just for a second, I thought she meant it. And I know this is all some weird misunderstanding, but some of the things she said were so sweet, and for a moment, all I could think was… how much better that would be. It almost makes me cry. How much simpler, how much easier, for it be someone I trust so completely, for us to just slip into bed the way we have so many times before, knowing it was no big deal, that whatever happened it was going to be all right, that she'd make it all right. She'd treat me like a princess, and I'd treat her the same way. I wouldn't have to worry about being mocked, or talked about, everything would be just between us, and afterwards we'd just lay, snuggled up, and talk, and maybe laugh about it, how we'd bumped heads, or got our bra straps caught. How much easier it would be if it was fun._

 _But of course she didn't mean it. She just wanted to be close to me, to share something. To protect me, even._

 _Is Jade right about Ted? Am I really just a conquest? Jeez, the look on her face. It was heartbreaking._

 _I'm rambling. I've got to go, now. This is exactly why I had to burn my last diary._

 _._

She sighed, and closed the diary. How much easier. But of course, it was never going to be easy. _We've been here before._

She knew how Jade felt, how easy it was to confuse friendship with affection, she knew it all too well. She still cringed at the memory, the look of horror on Alison's face, the cold stab in her stomach as she realized she'd overstepped the boundaries of friendship, gone too far.

And once they'd all found out, they'd never let her live it down.

But that wasn't the worst thing. The worst thing was that when it was all over, when she'd come to her senses, as Jade surely would, when she realized she'd made a fool of herself, she'd hated them all.

But most of all she'd hated Alison.

It hadn't been Alison's fault - she hadn't joined in, or used it against her. But if Alison had given her one kind word, explained, let her down gently, everything might have been different. But she hadn't. She'd left her standing, hopeless and alone, knowing what was to come, knowing that that one unguarded moment had ruined everything. She'd hated Alison for that, and the thought that Jade might one day feel like that about her was too much to bear.

So she was damned if she was going to let that happen. Better like this, to nip it in the bud, pass it off as a misunderstanding, laugh and make up. Pretend it never happened.

Better like this, than to let one slip of the heart bring it all crashing down.

.

.

.

Despite Tori's belief that she'd diffused the situation, the next few days were hard work. Jade was still a little aloof at school, as though wary that too much contact might disturb the equilibrium, and so Tori's attempts at cheerfulness and inclusion tended to fall a little flat, prompting only a wan smile and an excuse to be elsewhere.

And other people noticed, too, not least Beck, whom Jade had been studiously avoiding for some time. In desperation he turned to Tori, who was the last person to be able help.

"Hey, Tori."

Tori had been trying to keep her distance. She groaned inwardly, but rearranged her expression into a smile before she turned to face him. "Hey, what's up?"

"Have you spoken to Jade?"

"About what?"

"Well, anything really. You two seem to talk a lot these days."

"We're friends."

"Yeah, I get that."

"Is there something wrong?"

"No, no," Beck said. "It's just, I wondered if she'd said anything to you. She seems a little distracted, that's all."

"She hasn't said anything to me."

"You don't think there's something wrong?"

"Like what?"

"I dunno. Girl stuff."

She almost had to laugh. _Girl stuff_. That was it. It was as simple as that, as far as Beck was concerned. There was important stuff, and there was 'girl stuff' - unfathomable, emotional, confusing, to be treated like some weird disease that guys couldn't come too close to. To be quarantined until it was safe to return.

"I'll talk to her."

"Would you?"

"Sure."

But Tori didn't really care about Beck. The only thing Tori was concerned about was Jade. It seemed infuriating, unbelievable, even, that after all her efforts, all the trials and drama, the one thing she cherished more than anything was on the brink of slipping away, that they were on the verge of moving from friends to acquaintances, that even the spark of their pre-friendship confrontation had gone out. The thought of them spending the rest of their schooldays passing in the corridor with a blank smile and a nod was just too much to bear. So she resolved to force the issue.

She waited until the next class, which she knew would require Jade to get a book out of her locker. As the bell rang she sprinted across the hall and planted herself firmly in front of it, and waited.

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.

Jade approached, and Tori tried not to notice the slightly pained look that crossed the other girl's face as she saw her, knowing that she was already committed to her approach and to turn away would make things worse.

"Hey."

"Hi."

There was a pause.

Jade lifted an arm towards the locker. "Could I just..."

But Tori didn't move. Jade let her arm fall back to her side, and for a moment the two of them stood there, awkwardly. Finally Jade turned to leave.

Tori's composure crumbled. "Oh, come on," she pleaded. "Why are you doing this?"

Jade looked genuinely surprised. "What?"

"This." Tori said. "Being weird with me."

"I'm not being weird."

"Yes you are. It's like... It's like you're not there."

Jade looked guilty, and Tori knew she'd been right. She reached out and took one of Jade's hands. "I thought we'd straightened everything out."

"That's an interesting choice of words."

"You know what I mean."

"Yeah, I do." Jade sighed. "I'm sorry. You're right. It's just I don't know how to act around you."

"You don't have to act at all. Nothing's changed, Jade," Tori said. "Please don't say we've changed."

The slight tremor in her voice played in her favor, leaving Jade no choice but to reassure her or risk the 'sad puppy' face.

"We haven't, okay?" she said. "We're fine."

Tori tilted her head. "Really?"

"Yes, really. Look, it's just embarrassing, that's all. I feel like an idiot."

"Well forget it," Tori said, firmly. "You don't need to feel embarrassed in front of me. I've seen you dressed as a giant cheeseburger."

"That really doesn't help. And what do you mean, 'giant'? Are you saying I'm fat?"

"No, I'm saying we've both seen each other in some pretty crazy situations, and one of the basic rules of friendship is that you shouldn't feel embarrassed in front of your friends."

"That's easy for you to say. You don't know what it's like."

"You all watched me get dragged across an arena by a huge dog in front of hundreds of people!"

Jade smiled at the memory. "Yeah, that was pretty funny."

"You're also not supposed to laugh when _they're_ embarrassed, either. That's the other rule."

"Damn it."

"So, are we okay?"

"Yes."

"Are you sure?"

"Yes."

"Good." Tori folded her arms in a 'that's that' kind of way. "So let's just put all this behind us, get on with our lives, and never, ever speak of it again."

"Right." There was a short pause, as Jade cast around for something to say. "So," she said, "how's it going with Ted?"

Tori's forthright stance sagged a little. She mumbled something.

"What?"

"I said, we broke up."

Jade's ire was immediately up. "He dumped you?" she said. "Just because you didn't-"

"Shhh!" Tori looked around. "No," she said, "it was me. I broke it off."

"Why?"

"Because... I don't know, it was just too complicated," Tori said. "I couldn't really concentrate with all this other stuff going on."

"What other stuff?"

"You know. Us."

"There is no 'us', Tori."

"I know," Tori said. "It's just that it's kind of weird knowing that you're not happy about it, and it makes everything seem wrong somehow. I don't want to hurt you."

"I'm a big girl, Tori. I can handle a little friendship-based jealousy."

"I know, but I still don't want to do it. I'd never do anything to hurt you."

There was a long, awkward silence, as there always was when Tori said things like this. Jade stared at her boots.

"Heck, now you making me feel bad about the water bomb I planted in your locker."

"You planted a..." Tori opened the door, gingerly, to reveal nothing but her books. "There's nothing in there."

"Gullible, much, Vega?"

"Funny." Tori scowled. "Now maybe I _do_ want to hurt you. Not with Ted," she said, quickly, as Jade's eyes widened. "Not in a Ted-based way. I just mean…hit you or something."

"Oh, _do_ you now?" Jade said. "Well, let me tell you something, Tori, one, I can take more than you can possibly dish out, and secondly, you wouldn't have the cojones to try it."

Tori's eyebrows rose. "Oh, really?"

"Really."

There was a standoff as Tori considered her next move, Jade's eyes twinkling in amused defiance. Finally she reached out and flicked Jade on the nose.

Jade blinked in surprise, and Tori looked smug. But it wasn't going to last.

"That's it?" Jade said. "That's all you've got?"

"Well, I-"

Jade hand darted out to where Tori's shirt showed an inch of skin above her jeans and pinched, hard enough for Tori to squeak.

"Ow! You…"

She turned on Jade, expecting her to defend herself, but Jade simply held her arms out with a dangerous grin, daring Tori to try. It was a trap, and Tori knew it was a trap, but if she was fast enough…

She wasn't. Her hands had barely reached Jade's waist when the other girl closed her arms around her like a vice, and Tori found herself in the same bear-hug that had left her breathless once before. _Damn it._

" _Now_ what are you going to do, Miss Vega?"

Their faces were inches apart, and for a moment there was no sound but their breathing. Then Tori twisted her hand, managed to get a finger to Jade's ribcage and dug in. Jade half-gasped, half-shrieked, and her arms involuntarily clasped tighter, pulling Tori closer in, trying to stop her moving. The unexpected shift of Tori's weight unbalanced them both, and the dawning realization seemed to strike them simultaneously as they slowly toppled over, still locked together, and landed on the floor.

Luckily Tori's enormous bag broke their fall, and they lay there for a moment, panting, neither trusting the other one enough to release their grip.

"Let go."

"You first."

"I can't let go until you let _me_ go."

"I can't let you go."

"Then I can't let go."

"Well then you-"

"Hey, you two!" a voice said. "Get a room!"

They looked up to see a bunch of students smirking at them, and the sudden awareness of their predicament blew all thoughts of mutual retaliation away as they scrambled to their feet, red-faced. They dusted themselves down and Jade glared at their audience until they melted away.

"Well, _that_ wasn't embarrassing at all," Tori muttered, finally.

"You started it."

"No I didn't."

"You attacked me in the hallway."

"You told me to!"

"Yeah, yeah. Come on, we'd better get to class."

And they made their way down the corridor, awkwardness dispelled, both safe in the knowledge that for now, things were back to normal.

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But normality wasn't to last.

That evening, Tori was restless. It was way too early to go to bed, and she wouldn't sleep anyway. Her relief that she and Jade were back on normal terms was tempered by something else, some new anxiety, spurred by her encounter on the floor of the hall. Not the mockery of her schoolmates, which in itself was strange - not long ago she would have been panicking that their off-hand remarks were the prelude to a full-scale rumor storm that would leave her back where she'd been at her last school. But Jade was right, Hollywood Arts wasn't Sherwood, nobody cared. No, what was disturbing her was the odd feeling in the pit of her stomach as she'd lain there, pinned under Jade, trapped by their mutual distrust, unable to release each other, a fluttering, a tingling sensation, for those few seconds when the other girl had been so close to her, close enough to hear her heart beating, close enough to taste the sweetness of the coffee on her breath, the heat of her body, she'd felt…

She sat bolt upright. No, that wasn't right. That wasn't right at all. That was the opposite of right. That was wrong in all kinds of ways. And yet, little by little, the realization forced its way into her brain, as she sat, watching an image of herself caught in the mirror on the dressing table. It was the opposite, all right. The opposite of the last time she'd sat at the dressing table, the night she was due to go over to Ted's house.

And then she knew then what she'd felt in the hallway, as they'd lain on the ground, arms wrapped tight around each other, faces inches apart. She recognized it as something she'd only experienced as a spark, as an ember, as a flicker of light seen dimly through a forest. But now she saw it in all its glory, felt the heat on her face, heard the crackle in her ears.

She'd felt the fireworks.

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Jade hummed to herself as she opened her homework book. She felt happier, more settled, than she had in months, now that it was clear that Tori was keen to put the whole... she didn't even know what to call it. Incident? Indiscretion? Stalking campaign? The whole thing behind them. And their wrestling match in the school hall had capped it off, proof that they could be close, play, touch each other, without Tori getting the wrong idea. Even the dreams had started to become less frequent, less intense. And now Ted was out of the picture, the immediate threat of having to cope with all _that_ had receded. It really did feel like it was all over, and while she had to admit to a certain fluttering in her stomach as she remembered the feeling of Tori in her arms, she put it down to gas. She uncapped her pen and rattled it against her teeth as she contemplated the mathematical gibberish in front of her. If she simply pretended it made sense, she decided, then maybe it would.

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 _Oh crap. No, no, no. Not now_. Not after everything. Tori lay back on her bed, staring at the ceiling. They'd been right. All that time at Sherwood, they'd known. Heck, maybe even _she'd_ known. All this time she'd been fighting it, denying it. What was that quote? _Methinks the lady... something something something_. The more you protest, the more likely it's true. She'd done a whole lot of protesting, first to them, then to Trina, then to herself. And all this time the truth had been jiggling its tits in her face. _I like girls._

She tried to say it out loud, but nothing came out. She closed her eyes and tried again.

"I like girls."

The words, whispered though they were, seemed to echo around the room, deafeningly loud in the silence, and for a moment she expected to see horrified faces at the window, or hear her parents clutching each other and weeping as Trina rushed in to point a finger - _Aha!_ But nothing happened. She said it again, a little louder.

"I like girls."

Now it sounded childish. She cleared her throat. "I'm gay."

That was better. That sounded more self-assured.

"I'm a les-"

No, no. That sounded too serious, too clinical, too... accomplished. Like the difference between saying, 'I'm interesting in science' and actually knowing how to build a nuclear reactor. It spoke of experience, of already being in the saddle, as it were. No, _'gay'_ would do it.

She said it again, and strained her ears for the sound of property prices falling across the neighborhood or disappointed ancestors spinning in their graves, but all was stillness, save the rumble of distant traffic. It seemed that the world at large was entirely indifferent to her decision.

She rested her head back down. Great. That was the easy part. Now all she had to do was never, ever mention it to anyone for the rest of her life, and everything would be fine. Because fundamentally, it didn't change anything. She was still up shit creek; the only difference was, now she _knew_ she didn't have a paddle. She was still looking for love in all the wrong places.

 _Jade_. She felt her stomach churn. First Alison, now Jade. Alison had been cold and aloof, how would Jade react? They were friends, but then she and Alison had been friends, and that couldn't have gone any worse. The idea of making the same mistake again was terrifying, the thought of going too far, a touch, a word, seeing Jade shrink from her unintentional advances, the look of distain as she-

 _Whoa. Hold on there, Tori girl. Back right on up. It wasn't the same at all._

Because Jade had already _said_ she wanted her, hadn't she? She'd practically volunteered. _I wanted it to be me._ What if that was actually true? They'd spent a lot of time and effort talking it over, rationalizing everything, but that had all been based on the twin assumptions that Tori wasn't interested, and that Jade was confusing friendship with something else. Now at least one of those premises had turned out to be crock, what about the other? Because all the talking and rationalizing had been on Tori's part, Jade had just gone along with it. What if it she'd really meant it?

She cursed herself for not having had her epiphany a few days earlier, before Jade had come to the house. What if, instead of letting her down gently, Tori had just said, _okay, hot stuff, give me your best shot?_ She felt a guilty shiver of pleasure up her spine at the thought of how brazen that would have been. What would Jade have done? Run a mile? Or smiled, taken her by the hand and led her upstairs? Even if Jade had backed out, she'd at least have known. And she'd have one-upped her on the risk-taking, for sure.

She pounded a fist into the bed in frustration. _Missed opportunities_. What was a girl to do? The best plan of action, she decided, was to do nothing, just wait. In a couple of days, maybe she'd slowly drop a few hints, let Jade know, subtly, that she'd come to this decision, and then, over the course of the next few weeks, if Jade was interested, she'd maybe say something. That was it. Problem solved. Just be patient.

.

An hour later she was outside Jade's house.

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Jade was wrestling with a particularly irritating piece of algebra, and had just decided that the whole damned equation could be equal to a big fat _f(u)_ as far as she was concerned, when she heard the knock. She gave a grunt of assent, and the door opened. She turned to see Tori, clutching something to her chest. She straightened up. "Hey."

"I let myself in. I hope you don't mind."

Jade had forgotten that she'd lent Tori a key. "No, it's fine," she said.

Tori didn't move, just hovered in the doorway.

"Are you gonna come in?" Jade said, eventually. Tori nodded, and sidled into the room, pushing the door shut with her foot. She still said nothing, and they stood for a moment, looking at each other.

"You're kind of freaking me out, now, Tori," Jade said. "Did you want something, or-"

"I came to ask you a question." Tori finally broke her silence.

"Okay," Jade said. "And you couldn't just text?"

"No."

"Okay, well, fire away."

"Did you mean it?"

There was a sudden chill in the room, and Jade felt her skin prickle.

"Mean what?" she said, guardedly.

"What you said, the night you came over."

"About..."

"About how you wanted it to be you."

Jade groaned as she realized that the 'thing' wasn't over. "Oh, come on, Tori."

"Please. I need to know."

"I thought we'd just decided, a couple of hours ago, that we were never, ever, ever going to mention it again. _'Let's just put it behind us'_ , you said."

"I know. But that was before. Now I _need_ to know."

"Why?" Jade said. "What possible difference does it make?"

"It just does."

"But we already went through this. I was… confused."

"Is that all?"

"What do you want me to say?"

"I want you to tell me the truth."

"That _is_ the truth."

"Please, Jade."

Jade began to back away, but came up against the closet door. "Please, Tori don't do this to me. It's embarrassing."

"I'm not trying to hurt you," Tori said, quietly. "I just need to know."

"But this isn't fair."

"I need to know how you feel."

"Why, for God's sake?"

"Tell me."

"No!"

"Tell me!"

"All right," Jade said, angrily. "You want to know? You really want to know? Fine. Yes, Tori, I did. I meant it. I wanted it to be me. Okay? Happy now?"

Tori only nodded, as though considering this. "Yes."

"So why?" Jade demanded. "Why do you want to know so bad?"

"Because the thing is…" Tori said, and hesitated. She held out the diary. "I think _I_ wanted it to be you, too."

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Jade tried to speak, but nothing came out, the words catching in her throat. She licked dry lips, and watched as Tori's gaze dropped to follow the movement, moistening her own lips in response.

And after that it was inevitable, as Tori closed the gap between them, the diary falling to the floor, her hands rising to Jade's face as Jade's came to rest on her hips, lips brushing, tentatively at first, and then deeper, sinking into each other with tiny groans and murmured sighs.

 _And suddenly everything was movement, fingers plucking at buttons, fumbling with belt buckles, hot breath on cool flesh, bodies pressed close, not wanting to let an inch of daylight between them for fear it would break the spell, falling backwards to the unmade bed, a flurry of limbs and legs kicking off clothing and clawing at underwear, desperate to shed anything that came between them, reveling in the overwhelming urge to feel skin against skin, hands and hair and teeth and lips, roaming, searching, a conspiracy of gasps and giggles, a playground of unfamiliar sensation, the ebb and flow of strange seas..._

 _And finally Jade paused, her hand on Tori's stomach, sliding down across the taut, tan flesh, and she pushed herself up, away from the girl beneath her, a silver string still joining their lips, her eyes scanning Tori's face for the glimmer of consent._

 _And she found it, in the breathless nod, the whispered yes, and she slid her hand down, further, deeper, curling upwards, and Tori was gone, lost in the waves, face turned into the pillow, back arched, her hands grasping at the covers beside her head, lost, gone, every nerve exploding across the sky like fireworks..._

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 **Well, I think we can safely say that Tori has now officially Done Something. A little out of character, maybe, but she's got to earn her risk-taking badge somehow. So, what do you say? Shall we leave them there, tucked up together in mutual bliss?**


	11. Chapter 11 - The Right Thing

**Well hey there, long time no see. How are things with you? Feeling good? Looking forward to summer? Anyway, I've been watching Gentleman Jack and Killing Eve recently, both of which have a kind of Jori feel, and I felt a little guilty that I never really finished this off, so here's the epilogue. It'll probably be a couple of chapters, I think.**

 **And of course, things were never going to be quite that simple...**

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Tori lay, eyes open, nestled in the crook of Jade's arm, feeling the steady rise and fall of her breathing. She felt light-headed, almost weightless, floating in a bubble of euphoria. _I did it. I did it with Jade. And it was... perfect._ Even down to the slight giggle as they'd untangled themselves and fallen back, exhausted, into bed, barely bothering to pull the covers over them, still bathed in the afterglow, damp with exertion.

And now it was dark. What time was it? Her mom would be wondering where she was. _Screw it_. She didn't care. Anything was worth a few more moments of lazy bliss, even if she got bawled out. She wondered whether Jade was asleep.

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Jade wasn't, and hadn't been for some time. She lay awake, staring at the ceiling. Her body sang a song of pleasure, while her gut played a requiem of guilt.

She always suspected Beck cheated on her, even if she had no evidence of it, and she'd always maintained to herself that she never would. She wasn't a good person, she knew that, but this was one of the lines she'd always vowed she'd never cross, the one tiny patch of moral high ground that she could honestly lay claim to, even if she failed in every other aspect. _She'd never cheat._ And now here she was, cheating like a river-boat card sharp, and not just with anyone, either. With _Tori_. There was a school of thought among guys that said it was okay for your girlfriend to cheat with other girls, because that was hot, right? Heck, you might even get to join in. But she was pretty sure that that particular philosophy was only entertained by guys who didn't actually _have_ girlfriends, or were likely to get one, and that Beck was in no way going to brush this off as girly hijinks.

She felt Tori stir, snuggle a little deeper into her side, and the delicate hand resting on her stomach began making little circling movements.

For a moment she feared it was heading downwards, that Tori was going to want to start all over again. She tensed. If she did, Jade knew she'd be helpless to resist, moral compass or no moral compass. Because if last night had been a revelation for Tori, it had been quite an eye-opener for Jade, too. Sex with Beck had been okay, but she'd valued it more for its daring, for the rebellion in doing it at all, than for the act itself. And it hadn't taken long for that to wear off, for her to suspect that Beck was getting more out it than she was. Half the reason they argued so much was that it gave her an excuse for putting it off. But this had been something else entirely. A whole different ball-game. Her dreams had been nothing compared to the reality of a hot, eager and willing Tori Vega writhing beneath her.

But the hand instead began to move upwards, carefully avoiding any unnecessary diversions, until it came to rest on her chest, the fingers gently touching the small silver necklace around her neck, and Tori looked up.

The morning after a one-night-stand can be a tricky affair. It's difficult to find something to say, to know where you stand. You can't say 'I love you' because you probably don't, and even if you did, it might not be reciprocated. The person laying in your arms might be thinking about their laundry list, or making plans, or regretting the whole thing and hoping you'll go away without too much fuss. It's an awkward moment.

Luckily, Tori breached it without a thought. "Hi," she said.

"Hey."

There was silence for a few seconds. "Are you okay?"

"Yeah." Jade hesitated. "You?"

Tori gave a tiny giggle, barely enough for Jade to feel the breath on her skin. "Uh huh." There was more silence. Finally she looked up at her hand. "This is nice," she murmured.

Jade blinked. "What?"

"This," Tori said, twirling her fingers across the silver chain. "It's nice. Pretty."

"Oh. Er... thanks."

Tori laid her head back down, her hand sliding down again to Jade's stomach, and for a moment there was silence. But at least the ice had been broken. Jade licked dry lips. "Listen-"

"I know," Tori said, without looking up.

"What?"

"It's Beck, isn't it?"

Jade sighed. "Tori…"

"It's fine," Tori said. "Honestly."

"But-"

"I'm serious," Tori said, hoisting herself up on one elbow to bring herself level with Jade, "I really am. Look, none of this is your fault, okay? I don't want you to feel bad about anything. This was my idea. I came over here, and I guess that was pretty selfish. I put you in a difficult position…" Jade's eyebrow flickered upward, unintentionally, and Tori rolled her eyes. "No pun intended," she said. "But the point is, you did this for me, and I'm grateful. You didn't promise me anything, and I'm not _asking_ for anything. I don't want to split you up, or ruin your relationship, or any of that. I don't want to lose friendships, I don't want to be the girl that breaks everything, the one that doesn't care who gets hurt as long as she gets what she wants. So I won't say anything if you don't. This can just be our little secret. Just between me and you."

Jade had no idea what to say to that, and after a moment Tori rolled of the bed and started pulling on her clothes, as Jade watched helplessly. Finally, Tori slipped on her shoes and turned back towards her, leaning over the bed and planting a kiss on the other girl's forehead.

"But I just want you to know," she said, "that if this never happens again, if we just go back to the way we were, I don't regret it. I don't regret a minute of it. It was the best night of my life." She smiled. "I'm glad it was you."

She turned and headed for the door.

Jade finally found her voice. "Tori, wait."

Jade jumped out of bed and padded across the room, naked as she was, and realized she had no idea what she was going to say. Instead she unfastened the necklace from around her neck, paused for a moment, and reached up to clip it gently around Tori's. She stood back, as Tori looked down and touched it.

"Thank you." She smiled again, and with that she was gone.

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"Hey, hey, hey, Trina-bae!" Tori bounced into the room to find Trina scowling at the TV.

She looked up. "What the heck is wrong with you?" she said sourly.

"Nothing. I'm just in a good mood."

"Why?"

"No reason."

And where have you been till now? Mom was going crazy."

"Nowhere."

"Nowhere?"

"Well, Jade's house."

Trina said nothing, but stood up and moved closer, eyes narrowing in suspicion as she inspected Tori's face. Finally her eyes grew wide, her mouth falling open in disbelief as she backed away. "You did it!"

"Did what?"

"Ohh, don't you come the innocent with me, Tori Vega."

"I don't know what you mean."

"Yes you do! You did it. I recognize that look."

"What look?"

" _That_ look. The one you've never had before."

"If I've never had it, how can you recognize it?"

"Don't get smart with me, Tori. You've got a look you've never had before, which means you've _done_ something you've never done before, and the only thing I can think of that you've never done before that you might conceivably have done now, is the one thing you've been talking about doing for weeks without actually doing it, so it doesn't take a genius to work out that that is the _very thing that you've done_." She leaned back, pleased with herself.

"You've lost me."

"Sex, Tori."

"Oh. Crap."

"'Crap' indeed. So, did you use protection?"

"Protection?"

"The thing I gave you?"

"Why would we need..." Tori began to wonder whether, for all her talk, Trina actually knew how sex worked, until it dawned on her that Trina was under the illusion that she was lying about being at Jade's house, and had gone to Ted's instead - an illusion it might be wise not to dispel. "I mean, yes," she said. "Of course we did."

"Are you sure?"

"Yep," she said, confidently. "Just popped it right in there."

" _In_ there?"

"I mean on there. Down there. You know. We just… I know how to use a condom, Trina."

"Yeah, well, you said you knew how to use hair curlers, too, and then you had to wear a hat for a week."

"They were faulty!"

"Yeah, right. Well I hope you _did_ do it right, because I'm not ready to be 'Aunt Trina' just yet."

Tori sighed. "There is really, really, no danger of that."

"Plus there's the whole 'mom and dad go nuts and throw you out of the house' thing."

"They wouldn't do that."

"You haven't known them as long as I have, Tori. "

"I'm pretty sure a year's head start doesn't give you that much insight, considering you spent it in diapers."

"Hey, kids are sensitive. They pick things up. And I can tell you, mom is not going to be happy with you and a baby."

"There isn't going to be a baby."

"You'd better hope not. You'd probably have to move into a home for troubled girls."

"This isn't the nineteen-fifties, Trina."

"Or get it adopted."

"No I wouldn't."

"I guess you could always leave it in a basket outside someone's door, with a note."

"Well I suppose…Trina!"

"What?"

"I'm not leaving my baby on someone's doorstep!" Tori said. "What if it gets eaten by wolves?"

"Problem solved."

"That is _not_ how you solve a problem, Trina. No problem, ever, was solved by babies being eaten by wolves."

"Not yet, Tori, but sometimes you have to think outside the box. No one ever thought you could wear eight-inch heels with khaki leg-warmers, but I proved them wrong."

"You really, really didn't."

"What do you know about fashion? Anyway, we don't have any wolves in L.A."

"Good."

"It'd have to be a bear."

"What?"

"Or a coyote. I'm pretty sure we've got coyotes."

"Good grief."

"Foxes."

"Trina…"

"Squirrels?"

"Squirrels don't eat babies!"

"Yeah, they're kind of picky. Maybe you could smear it in peanut butter or something."

"Look, I am not standing here discussing the best way to get my baby eaten by wild animals. Not that there even _is_ a baby. Or ever likely to be."

"Not with _that_ attitude."

"What the… That doesn't even make _sense_ , Trina," Tori said. "Why am I even talking to you?"

"Because-"

"Never mind. Forget it. I'm going upstairs."

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Jade lay on the bed, its sheets still warm from Tori's presence. _What the hell just happened?_ Well, that wasn't really the issue, it was pretty obvious what had happened, she'd just slept with Tori. So okay, _why?_ No, that wasn't the issue either, it felt as though she'd thought about nothing else, at least theoretically, ever since Tori had announced her intention of sleeping with Ted. The real question was...

What _was_ the real question? _Why had Tori done it?_ Tori had done it because she wanted to, and Jade had unwittingly offered herself up as a candidate, practically _begged_ to be her first. Unwitting but not unwilling - she tried to find it in herself to feel a little used, a little exploited, but the memory of her fingers fumbling with Tori's shirt buttons gave the lie to that. No, there was no mystery to any of these things, Tori had wanted it, Jade had wanted it, they'd done it, and then Tori had gone home. All perfectly normal. Well, not normal, exactly, it was beyond her powers of rationalization to describe the events of the last few hours as normal, she'd just slept with Tori Vega, for Christ's sake - but not unheard of, not something that would make the local news. _Teenagers Have Sex in Los Angeles Area, Participants Describe It As 'Pretty Awesome'. Film At Eleven._

The real question, then was... what now? Jade had never questioned her sexuality, but then up until now her entire experience had revolved around Beck. How do you know if you like something if you've never tried it, if you've just gone with the flow because that's the way things were? How would you know if you liked caramel popcorn if you'd only ever had salted? How would you know if you liked jam donuts if your mom only ever bought custard ones? How would you know that you wouldn't prefer tea to coffee if you tried it?

No wait, scratch that. Her sexual preferences may be up for review, but nobody fucked with her coffee. Anyway, the point was, other options were now on the table, there were twice as many runners on the field, and she was now exactly one-hundred per cent more aware of the possibilities than she had been a few hours ago.

Except, practically, she was no better off than she was before. Tori had left, apparently happy to call it a one-time thing, and she was still with Beck. So nothing had changed, except for a maddening snatch of a world that made more sense, that seemed more real, like a prisoner in Plato's Cave catching a glimpse of the sun.

And then she was gripped by a worse thought. What if _Tori_ had felt exploited? What if she'd felt that Jade had led her on, lured her into believing there was something more, only to be crushed by the realization that she wasn't going to leave Beck? What if Tori was laid in bed right now, writhing in misery, the necklace flung against the wall in a fit of angry tears, sobbing herself to sleep, cursing Jade as a heartless user, a manipulative predator, a flagrant violator of-

 _Bzzz._

Her phone buzzed. She picked it up. A message from Tori.

 **Hi, I know this seems a little weird but thanks for tonight xxxxx**

Okay, well maybe Tori wasn't quite the quivering blob of regret that she'd imagined. Unless she was just putting a brave face on it, or her message concealed a hidden plea for love that Jade couldn't quite decipher.

She was about to reply when another message turned up, again from Tori.

 **PS could you bring my art history text book back in tomorrow? Thanks x**

Hmm. That didn't sound too agonized. Unless 'art history book' was a euphemism for 'wantonly stolen virginity', which was a bit of a stretch.

 **PPS please don't paint it black! :) :) :) x**

It was difficult to detect much soul-searching in three smiley faces. She sighed, and texted back:

 **Sure, no problem x**

And then it occurred to her that while 'sure, no problem' might be an appropriate response to returning, and refraining from vandalizing, a missing text book, it was probably a little terse in reply to someone who was essentially thanking you for going to bed with them.

 **And you're very welcome for the other thing** , she texted. **My pleasure xxx**

 _Shit._ She wasn't sure whether that sounded sarcastic, pompous, or just plain creepy. She was halfway through another message that started, _'And by that, I mean-'_ when a final message came through that was nothing but smiley faces, so she guessed that Tori wasn't too offended. She deleted the half-written message and let her head fall back against the pillow, exhausted by the exchange.

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Tori looked at her phone, satisfied. Nothing smoothed over the troubled waters of an awkward situation like smiley faces. She wondered if she'd overdone it, and whether Jade would think she was some kind of simpleton, but the deed was done. She lay back on the bed, and sighed.

She felt a little pang of regret that this wasn't the start of something, only the end, but she'd meant what she'd said - she'd never intended to hurt anyone, and if the price she was going to pay for tonight was eternal silence then so be it. At least, she told herself, she'd done the right thing - if anything that involved sleeping with someone else's girlfriend could ever be considered 'the right thing' – by being practical about it. Jade had given no sign that she wanted anything more, and Tori had no right to expect it, or to make things difficult for her. It was done. Over. And if no one else could ever know she'd finally lost it, well… at least _she'd_ know. And Jade, of course. In the end, maybe this was better. She and Jade would forever be linked by last night, a bond of secrecy, and friendship was more important than love. Wasn't it?

She rolled over, but all she could see when she tried to sleep was Jade's face above her, tangled curls hanging down, her eyes dark and wild with an angry lust that had both frightened her and excited her. Instead she sat up, turned on the TV, and flicked through the channels in search of something diverting enough to blot out the one tiny, nagging doubt that still lingered – what would she have done if Jade _had_ wanted more?

Because the truth was that somewhere under all the regret was an ugly sense of relief. Relief that things _were_ going to carry on the way they always had, that she wasn't going to be called on to turn everyone's world upside down.

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Relief that everything would stay just the way it was.

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 **Well there we go, Tori's done the sensible thing, everything's going to be fine ;)**

 **I appreciate you reading this, I know it's been a while and I'm a little rusty. Any comments more than welcome.**


	12. Chapter 12 - The Wrong Thing

**So it turns out that this is less of an epilogue, and more like just some more story, sorry about that. I blame Tori for forgetting the damned diary. I mean, honestly, Tori.**

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Jade was getting into bed when her foot nudged something on the floor. She reached down and picked it up. A small, lavender notebook. And she remembered, when Tori had come over, just before she'd... Jade didn't know quite how to put it. Propositioned her? Seduced her? But anyway, she'd been clutching this to her chest, as though it had meant something. She looked closer, to see a small, handwritten title. Tori's Diary.

Now Jade knew that if you'd asked anyone who knew her, either personally or by reputation, whether she was the kind of girl that would sneak a look at someone's diary if she found it unattended, the answer would almost certainly be 'yes'. In fact if you asked them if she was the kind of girl who break into someone's house, tie them up, jimmy open their desk and steal their diary, or simple hold them at gunpoint and force them to read extracts of their own diary out loud whilst mocking them into a puddle of humiliation, the answer would also probably be 'yes'. And yet she hesitated.

Six months ago she'd be making herself some popcorn and settling down to a good read. But now this felt like spying on Tori, breaking her trust, and right now it was mutual trust that was holding everything together. They shared a secret, and if Jade betrayed Tori, she was pretty sure that karmic retribution would kick her in the ass. And in many ways, she didn't want to know – when she thought back to her behavior over the condom, and the phone, and Ted, and all the other stupid things she'd done, she wasn't entirely sure she wanted to read Tori's personal assessment of her crimes against common sense and decency, it would be like watching a blooper reel of your own life.

And so she carefully took the diary, unopened and unread, and slid it back under the bed. The time would come when it could be returned without any fuss, but for now she felt a strange sense of relief, of contentment. For once in her life, for one night only, she'd Done the Right Thing, and although there was no one around to record this epic event, to blow the bugle and break out the bunting, she lay back to savor the feeling before it slipped away. Before _she_ slipped away, into a deep and restful sleep.

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 _And sometime before dawn, she had the dream again – she's sat by the lake, watching the lily, and she knows what's going to happen, knows it will be lost, and she tries to resist, tries to ignore the distraction, tries to focus, but it's hopeless. And in the end there's only the long, lonely silence as she watches it float away._

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If Jade had expected things to be awkward back at school, she was pleasantly surprised. Tori's demeanor was happy, ecstatic, almost - what Jade would have considered 'Tori' turned up to eleven. And when it showed no sign of either abating or veering towards an explosive confession in the middle of the Asphalt Café that would leave a smoking hole in the middle of their little circle, Jade began to relax, enjoying the easiness with which they shared their new-found conspiracy. She would sometimes catch Tori glancing at her, and when she did, Tori would flash her a sly smile, and Jade would blush a little and look down with a secret smile of her own. She'd been carrying Tori's diary in her bag, hoping for an opportunity to either slip it into her locker, or hand it over with a modest shrug at her own personal sacrifice in not having read it. It said a lot for their new relationship that Jade expected Tori to believe this, but then things were different now.

The difference was noticeable, and if anyone was going to notice, it was Beck.

"What's going on with you two?" he asked, as Tori drifted past the table with a wave.

"What do you mean?"

"You and Tori. Ever since she broke up with Ted you've been all over each other."

Jade waved a hand dismissively. "It's your imagination."

"Yesterday you bought her coffee."

"What's wrong with that?"

"You've never bought _me_ coffee."

"You've never asked."

"And neither did she."

"So I'm a good Samaritan."

"And she wasn't even surprised, like it was the most normal thing in the world."

"It _is_ the most normal thing in the world."

"For some people, maybe. But not for you. The last time you, Tori, and coffee were involved, you were pouring it over her head."

"That was years ago," Jade said, irritably. For some reason, everything about Beck irritated her lately. "Things change. _I've_ changed."

"Yeah, right," Beck muttered.

"And what's that supposed to mean?"

"Nothing."

"Beck..."

"You've just been acting really weird lately, that's all."

"Because I'm nice to someone?"

"Not just that. It's like you're... distracted. Like you're not really here, even when you're with me. If I didn't know better I'd think you were..." He tailed off.

"What?"

"Nothing. Doesn't matter."

"Beck…"

"I've gotta go. See you later."

"But-"

He was gone, and Jade found herself staring at the table, a strange churning sensation forming in the pit of her stomach. She felt wretched, for all kinds of reasons. Not just guilt for having cheated, but something else, something worse, something she realized she hadn't felt in a long time.

She shook her head. It was a one-off, a favor for a friend, an experience to that she'd think of when she was older as her 'experimental' phase. Tori was happy to put it behind them, and so was she.

But still it lingered… along with the memory of a girl on a shoreline, longing for something she could never quite reach.

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"Tori. Hey, Tori!"

Tori turned to find Beck jogging to catch up with her. She stopped. "What's up?"

"Listen, could we talk?"

"Er..."

He took her by the arm and maneuvered her into the janitor's closet. "Listen," he said. "It's about Jade."

"What about her?"

"How long have we been friends?"

"You and Jade?"

"No, us. Me and you."

"Oh. Well, ever since I started school, I guess."

"And you'd tell me if there was something I needed to know, right? You wouldn't lie to me?"

"Yes. And no."

"What?"

"Well, there were two different questions there, and they-"

"The thing is," Beck went on, ignoring her, "you and Jade, you've been getting pretty close lately."

"Mmm..."

"I can tell, Tori. I've seen the looks. You and her, there's something going on."

Tori's blood ran cold. "Beck..."

"Come on. I'm not an idiot."

"I-"

"I know you like her, but I matter too, right?" The grip on her arm tightened.

"Well, yes, of course you do, but-"

"I mean, me and you, we were friends first, before you two were even speaking to each other."

"Yes, look, Beck-"

"So you'd tell me, wouldn't you?"

"Well-"

"Wouldn't you?"

"You're kind of hurting my arm, now-"

"Is it true?"

"I-"

"Is she cheating?"

"Um-"

" _Is_ she?"

"It's not…" Tori felt herself about to crack. _It's not like that._ "I mean-"

"Is she seeing another guy?"

There was a long silence, as Tori brain struggled to scramble back from the cliff-edge of confession.

"A... guy?"

"Yes."

"Why... Why would you think that?"

"I don't know," Beck said in frustration, releasing his grip. "It's just she's been so distant lately, like she's thinking about something else all the time. And she's _happy_ , too, and that's not like her."

"Happy?"

"Yeah. But only when she's not with me. When I try to get close to her, to join in, she just shuts down, like she'd rather be someplace else."

"I'm sure that's not true."

"It is. And when I ask her about it, she just brushes me off, like it's not my business. We haven't had... well, you know. In weeks."

"That's a little too much informa-"

"I mean, what does that suggest to you?"

"Well I'm not really an expert, but..."

"But you'd tell me, wouldn't you?" Beck pressed. "If you knew?"

"Beck-"

"Is she?"

The look on his face was horrible, torn between desperation and uncertainty, wanting to know and yet not to know, and Tori felt a sharp pain in her chest, a shard of guilt between her ribs. She couldn't bear to see him like this, and yet she couldn't betray Jade.

Tori was a terrible liar. She snapped like a twig under pressure, a fact that had been exploited by Trina for years. But she had a strategy. _Ignore the big picture, and focus on the specifics_.

"No," she said firmly, "she hasn't cheated on you with any other guys. And no, she's not seeing someone else."

His shoulders sagged and relief softened his expression. "Thanks."

"It's okay," Tori said, rubbing at her arm. Beck blinked, as though seeing her for the first time.

"God, I'm sorry," he said. "Are you okay?"

"Yeah, I'm fine," Tori said, airily, trying to massage some life back into it. "It's no worse than when Jade drags me in here."

She wondered if that was a wise thing to say, but Beck didn't seem to notice. "Okay. Well, thanks," he said. "I owe you one."

She gave him a brittle smile, which lasted long enough for him to leave, before she and it drooped, and she slumped back against the cleaning cupboard.

She wondered whether to tell Jade about Beck's suspicions, but it seemed risky – on the one hand she might be more on her guard, tone down her behavior, but equally she might fly off the handle at the accusation and drop them both in it. Probably for the best to just say nothing. She pulled herself upright, took a deep breath, and opened the door, striding out as though nothing had happened, and trying to ignore the wicked little sense of pride at the back of her mind. _She did it with me, now she doesn't want it with Beck._

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"Damn it."

They were sitting at the table in the café, as Tori was rummaging through her bag.

"What is it?" Jade said.

"I forgot my purse."

"Sucks to be you."

"Thanks."

"What do you need your purse for, anyway?"

"To get some lunch. I don't have any pockets in these jeans, so I put my money in my purse, and then I put my purse in my bag, and-"

"-and then the purse fairy took it out again."

"What?"

"Well it's clearly not in there, so either someone took it out again, or you're just a big fat liar."

Tori poked around in vain a few more times, and gave up. "Well I guess I just won't have any lunch," she said, sadly.

"Looks that way."

"And I'm really hungry, too."

"I'll bet."

"I feel a little faint."

"That can happen. Low blood sugar."

"Ohhhh..."

Jade couldn't resist any longer. "Okay, fine," she sighed, reaching into her pocket and pulling out a bill. "Here. That's my last five bucks. And I want it-"

"Thank you!" Tori sang, plucking it from her fingers before she had time to finish. She disappeared toward the food truck, leaving Jade to consider the truth of what Beck had said. It _did_ seem like the most normal thing in the world, in the way it never had before. It just felt right. There was no time to speculate on what this might mean before Tori returned with as much food as she could get for five dollars.

"Is there any change?"

"Uh uh," Tori mumbled, through a mouthful.

They were joined by the others, who sat down in a babble of inconsequential chatter. Beck was with them, but he made no move to sit next to Jade, instead dropping down onto the free seat opposite.

"Hi!" Cat said. Tori smiled, and Jade just nodded. She could have done without this, she'd rather have had Tori to herself.

Cat cast around for something to say, and her gaze came to rest on the silver necklace around Tori's neck. "That's pretty," she said.

"What?"

"That." She pointed.

Jade could sense Tori's unease as attention fell on the impromptu gift. "Oh. Er, thanks." Tori moved a hand towards the necklace to cover it up, but it was too late. It was ironic that when you wanted Cat to pay attention to anything important she could be distracted by her own hair, but when you wanted her to shut up she was like a dog with a bone.

"Have you got a middle name?"

"No, why?"

"It's got a little 'J' on it."

"Where?"

"Right there."

Jade groaned. She'd forgotten the tiny silver charm worked into the necklace. Tori looked down, squinting to see it. "Oh, that," she said. "It's, um… it's a 'T'."

"Is it?"

"Yes," Tori said. "For 'Tori'."

"Is it?" Cat looked skeptical. "It looks like a 'J'."

"Well it isn't."

Andre leaned in. "Sure looks like one," he said. "It's got a piece across the top, there, and then it goes down nice and straight like a 'T' would, but just when you think you're done, it curls right back up and _boom_. You're looking at a 'J', right there."

"It's not a 'J'," Tori insisted. "It's a 'T'. It's just got a little… tail."

"A tail?"

"Yes," Tori said, firmly. "A tail."

"Is that what they told you in the store?"

"What store?"

"The store where you bought it."

"Oh. Er, yes."

"They ripped you off."

"What?"

"They sold you a 'J'."

"No they didn't."

"Yeah, they did," Andre said, confidently. "Probably got a lot of 'J's they need to get rid of. Not that popular."

"If you turn it sideways it could be an 'h'," Cat said brightly.

"No it… how would that even help?"

"It could stand for 'happy'," she said. "My brother had some letters tattooed on his hand." She frowned. "They didn't stand for 'happy' though."

"Look," Tori said, "once and for all-"

"It's a 'J'," Beck said dully, staring at the table. They all turned to him. He looked up. "I ought to know," he said. "I bought it."

Jade's heart sank. _Crap_. Of course Beck had bought the necklace. It had been a present last Christmas.

Andre frowned. "You bought Tori a necklace with a 'J' on it?"

"No. I bought it for my-"

Jade had had enough. "Can we all just shut up about the stupid necklace!" she snapped, getting to her feet. "It was mine, I didn't want it anymore, so I gave it to Vega. That's it. End of story. Okay?"

There was silence. "Okay?" she repeated. She didn't dare catch Beck's eye, or Tori's, so she hoisted her bag over her shoulder and stomped back into school.

.

.

.

She regretted it immediately, not just because she'd probably hurt Tori's feelings, but because she'd left her out there to face the music. She was about to turn around and go back when she saw Tori walking across the hall, alone. She hid behind a locker, bracing herself for the look of anger on the other girl's face, for the sight of her ripping the gift from her throat and throwing it away. But instead she watched as Tori unclipped the necklace with a sad little sigh, letting it pool into the palm of her hand, and then, after looking both ways across the empty hall, she brought it to her lips, murmuring something Jade couldn't quite catch, before pushing it into her locker and turning away down the corridor, head bowed, leaving Jade staring after her.

Something was wrong. No, _everything_ was wrong.

Her hand moved unbidden to her bag, her fingers closing on Tori's diary. _You said you wouldn't_ , her conscience chided. _You said you were going to do the right thing_.

And now I'm doing the wrong thing. I need to know.

 _And what if it's not what you think? What will you do then?_

I'm a big girl. I can cope.

She pulled out the notebook and opened it, scanning the pages, looking for her name.

She didn't need to look for long. It was there. And there. And _there_ , and _there_ , and _there_ …

The whole damned diary was about her.

Jade said this, Jade did that, Jade came over, Jade _stayed_ over…

 _…_ _love is just friendship with the squicky bits thrown in…._

 _…_ _I don't care if I never share this bed with anyone but her…_

Aware that time was against her, she flipped to the end, to the last thing that Tori must have written before she'd turned up that night.

 _I'm going over there, right now. Maybe she'll turn me away, maybe she won't. But sometimes you have to take a chance, don't you?_

 _Sometimes you have to take a chance, to get what you want._

 _._

 _._

 _._

She made her decision. She snapped the book shut, and sprinted off down the corridor.

.

.

.

.

.

 **So, what's she going to do? What does she expect to happen? And what about Beck?**

 **Stay tuned. I'm really going to try to get this finished next week.**


End file.
